Bob Hope, RIP

All, I've been feeling pretty bad about losing old Bob. None of us are getting any younger. Any of you vets (or anybody else for that matter) feel like getting together this weekend and supporting our local talent down at the Laff Hole, in honor of Bob? I hope they'll tell some of his jokes, and maybe even sing a few of his songs for old-times sake.

Heh I actually agree with you Tom.. King of the one liner put downs.. one of my hobbies too.

You wish!

should that be you hope? :p

"RMC" wrote in message news:bgreng$rsdpr$[email]...

LOL nicely done

eerrrrrrrrrrr wait.. I got one.

<< Subject: Bob Hope, RIP From: "Tom Anderson" [email] Date: Tue, Aug 5, 2003 10:27 PM Message-id:

All, I've been feeling pretty bad about losing old Bob. None of us are getting any younger. Any of you vets (or anybody else for that matter) feel like getting together this weekend and supporting our local talent down at the Laff Hole, in honor of Bob? I hope they'll tell some of his jokes, and maybe even sing a few of his songs for old-times sake. >><BR><BR>

Whoa! Uh, I think he said they're having a party with that old guy's dead body at Anderson's house. That rules!

"> All,

body

Cool, like that movie about that dude named Ernie or something who dies then walks around doing all that stupid crap all weekend with those two dorks. But I don't think they had a neck-or-feel-ya party with him like Tom Anderson plans on having with Bob. Thats pretty messed up, Tom. Your a pre-vert.

"King Turd" wrote in message news:iRy_a.7903$[email]...

dead

then

Dammit Turd-boy, you know who the pervert is here, and it's not old Tom.

Anyway, I went down to the Laff Hole, but there was no tribute to Bob. Just a bunch of kids hopped up on caffeine and who knows what else, generally acting like menaces to society. This one feller pulls his shirt over his head on stage and proceeds to scream out the most ridiculous string of sounds I've ever heard in my life. I don't know if it was comedy or not, but I got the hell out of there. I guess this younger generation never got to see Bob at his finest like I did...

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Tom, we all know about your turd thefts and midnight artificial insemination clinic burglaries. So who's the pre-vert, here?

Now I've defended you in the past Tom, told your neighbours that you're a veteran and suffer for what you've seen and done fighting Emporer Tojo but you've just gone too far this time. I was down the local Korean restaurant ("The Lucky Spaniel", motto "man's best friend, freshly fried") the other day when details of your murky past emerged.

I had just got my main course and the chef came to see me, to check that my clispy rabrador with regg flied lice was to my liking. The old man saw me and froze, I realized I was the only roundeye in the place and he didn't like the look of me. He trembled with fear and shouted at the top of his voice 'NO MALINE RANDERSON WE WILL NOT STLIP AND DANCE FOR YOU'.

When the guy came to his senses and realized I couldn't be the young marine that had torn through the little village of Hung Well, back in '57, he told me what he and the other monks from the Buddhist monastory had gone through. Apparently a certain marine had rounded them up, ordered them to strip, covered them in soy sauce and then forced them to dance the foxtrot to Glenn Miller tunes on a portable grammophone. This continued for fifteen hours until his superior, Major Eugene Buzzcut I had arrived and asked 'Private Anderson, what in God's name do you think you are doing?'

The poor Monk lost his faith in god after that awful day and hid in a tree until 1965. A sad, sickening tale indeed...

I think you've got your wars mixed up. Let it rest...