In Memoriam: Cartman

Sep 9, 199811 posts by 8 postersalt.tv.southpark
11 posts

Im going to be busy with school for a while so here is one for the road, gang.

Jeus and chef goe crusing for young boys and dogs. Four boys trie to run from them. but they catch them easy. Jesus sayuy, this tiem I get to have you Cartsamann, your fatt butte terns me on. You will be priviedged to be raped by the Son of God. Cartsman say gotojheell,asshoel,sonbitchhateyou,goway! Jessus get reaally pissed off look on face. Child moelster chef look worried , say uh oh. Jeesus put hand on cartman butt. No no, stopasshoel, say carman. Then cartman feel tired, unable moev,he trie to moev bu all can feel his pain all over body. He can't breeethe because feel like something clocking in throat. His lungs stop working. Jesus give him hand mirror and he see purple veined, pulsing mass down throat blocking airway. I give you cancer with my hanbd, not my mind, say Jeeesus proudly. Damn, I really liked moelsting that fatass whiet boy, say child molester chef. Then cartsman grab stomache, something gorwing out of it making swell, face red and teech clenched, owwww, all can feel is pain. New fast acting, Son O' God Cancer, say Jeesus,. He and Chef both start laughting. then Cartsman feel something tear open inside stoameche, Hot stinging liquid fklow through his adbdominal cavity. HE wipe his fat swety face and a patch of ded skin cum off and smell reaaly bad. His body start sweeling even moer than is alread, His face turn blue. Then he fall over and cough up blood and die. Jessus say, I see to it he in Hell now too! Other boys just stare, thought only happend dto kinnie. They let chef and Jessus do whatever want with them after that! Chef have fun with body one more time just for old times sake!

Cartsman is litttle annoying , bigot boy! How can you not want him to die painfully? This what I wanted to see happen evrery time I watched show! I guess all of you like little ashole bigots? I thoguht so! Bye for now. See ya later.

On 10 Sep 1998 01:30:54 GMT, [email] (DocWonmug) wrote:

Aw... so SORRY to see you go.

I hope you get Aids and die painfully... but JUST in case...

*plonk*

killfiled, you obnoxious dip.

----- Lone Wolf My Kung-Fu is the best.

"It was as if the lights dimmed just for him." - Steve Buscemi, Desperado

"Oh my god! Kenny killed death!" "You... bastard?" - South Park

"You wanna see what I can bring to the party?" - The Drew Carey Show

Lone Wolf (Chris Baile) wrote in message ...

road, gang.

What, you hope he dies in about 10 years? You can do better than that, Wolfie.

Gaz Kelly (_*_) [email] http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Village/1408 The Times introduces topless obituaries as of today.

DocWonmug wrote:

Ok Doc, we understand. Kindergarden is a big first step up from preschool, you know. You'll have to work a lot harder there and you'll learn so many new things like tying your shoes, coloring within the lines, and (gasp!) spelling. Good luck!

-Toni

(note to Mark: Yes I just fed another troll so feel free to bean me over the head with your chart.)

DocWonmug wrote in message ...

gang.

from

me

worried ,

Now THAT's FUNNY!

Uhh..Thankyou for that "Interesting" message. I found it very amusing whilst I was eating my *tomato* sandwich =p. I say, Cartman's mean, but he don't deserve to be KILLED. Anyway, Chef ain't a child molester. Just a women molester =p I don't really know 'bout Jesus DocWonmug wrote in message ...

gang.

from

me

worried ,

pain

purple

chef.

red

liquid

patch

and

more

Uhh..Thankyou for that "Interesting" message. I found it very amusing whilst I was eating my *tomato* sandwich =p. I say, Cartman's mean, but he don't deserve to be KILLED. Anyway, Chef ain't a child molester. Just a women molester =p I don't really know 'bout Jesus DocWonmug wrote in message ...

gang.

from

me

worried ,

pain

purple

chef.

red

liquid

patch

and

more

In article, DocWonmug writes-

I hope you are really young and can't use a key board 'cause you can't speel shit!!

Kez "watch the water"

DocWonmug wrote in message ...

South Park's viewers KNOW Cartman's a twat. That's the whole point, twiddlebonce. If he was just a nice lad who said all the right things and didn't have a twatty bone in his body, there'd be no point to him. Now go and deal with your inner twat and leave us twats alone.

Oh, nearly forgot.

...<PLONK!>
Gaz Kelly (_*_) [email] http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Village/1408 The Times introduces topless obituaries as of today.

Right,I don't believe Doc said anything to the contrary. Why don't you answer his point about Cartman being annoying? I seriously don't think you can, whore.

Wow! A tremendously pretentious and stupid post, "Bessie," even for a South Park fan!

Hey, go PLONK yourself!

ALL TOGETHER NOW: BESSIE MORIBUND'S A STUPID BITCH!!!

We love you, DOC! Come back to us!

JoStalin13 wrote in message ...

point,<BR>

things<BR>

him.<BR>

answer

can, whore.

Doc deserves to be annoyed.

South

I am nobody's fan. And why don't you point out where the pretension and/or stupidity is in my post instead of just being snotty?

I do, every night.

"All"? What, you and your dog?

Oh, and your use of 'whore' and 'bitch' in your rant, even though the name in my sig is clearly male, speaks volumes about you.

Gary Robert Kelly (_*_) [email] http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/Village/1408 The Times introduces topless obituaries as of today.