This is a kind of novel I'm creating... ...I know it's terribly off topic, but I want your opinion. I'm trying to decide how to work the story.... ...also Jeff, I used your last name for my main character.... ...hope you don't mind. ****************************************************** Tiagaron By Drew Warren
I looked up through the crystal clear water, my air bubbles floating to the surface, with the clear, crisp color of the Pacific waters on the bottoms of them, and the gleaming sun on the tops of the round air pockets. Then I remembered why I was there. I thought to myself, �Hello?! Earth to Jeremy?!� I was supposed to be collecting coral and shells for grinding into marble. Right. I�m Jeremy Plas, I�m 13, and I work � or worked � for an offshore shell marble company. That day, I was diving with a friend of mine, Drake Illarus, to gather coral from a rich reef off of Hawaii�s smallest island, Oahu, for my father�s marble industry. I had been daydreaming when Drake, my bud since we were infants, roused me back into reality. �Dude, come on! Your dad is gonna kill us if we don�t get the 180 pounds of coral he wants!� Drake reminded me. �I know, I know. I just want to get a good look at this place before we defile it,� I had replied. Drake and I were about the only kids on the 20-person team of teenagers that actually cared about the reefs we destroyed. We were just too scared of my dad to say anything. �Drake, let �s dive a little deeper, there�s an interesting coral formation over there,� I pointed to a fire coral formation that towered over all the other coral, it resembled a flaming watchtower. �Don�t touch it Jeremy!� Drake needlessly reminded me. I had an encounter with a fire coral the previous year that had left me blistered and miserable. I never touch fire coral. I floated down into the coral area that held the giant base of stinging coral, with Drake right behind me. I was examining the intricate web of a nearby sea anemone when something caught my eye. I called, �Drake! Come take a look at this!� I drifted closer to it. It was metal, definitely, but unlike any metal I had ever seen; it was laced with coral surrounding it in an upwardly spiral fashion. Drake took one look and said, �Unreal.� I drifted towards it until I was floating right next to it. There were some inscriptions and symbols that I couldn�t read, but then, all the symbols rearranged themselves and formed a word I could understand. I took a deep breath and whispered, �Tiagaron.�
That's the first chapter..... .....tell me what you think, your favorite parts... ...etc.
Gyrex Derision