Movie Mega-Spoiler - Memeorable Quotes

Sep 16, 19992 posts by 2 postersalt.tv.southpark
2 posts

Here are some quotes from the movie that I found on the Net. I'm not responsible for misspellings or anything else, because I didn't write these...

Memorable Quotes from South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut (1999)

Mr. Garrison: Sorry kids, I just can't trust something that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.

[In bed together.] Satan: Is sex the only thing that matters to you? Sadaam Hussein: I love you.

Satan: How come you always want to make love to me from behind? Is it because you want to pretend I'm somebody else? Saddam Hussein: Satan, your ass is gigantic and red. Who am I going to pretend you are, Liza Minelli?

Terrance: You're such a pig-fucker, Phillip! Phillip: Terrance, why would you call me a pig-fucker? Terrance: Well, let's see. First of all, you fuck pigs. Phillip: Oh yeah!

[Demonstrating a "V-Chip" planted into Cartman] Dr. Vosknocker: Now, I want you to say "doggy". Cartman: Doggy. [to audience] Dr. Vosknocker: Notice, that nothing happens. [to audience to Cartman] Now, say "montana". Cartman: Montana. Dr. Vosknocker: Good. Now, "pillow". Cartman: Pillow. Dr. Vosknocker: Alright. Now I want you to say "horse fucker". Mrs. Cartman: Go on, honey. It's alright. Cartman: Horse fu-- [gets shocked by the V-chip] That hurts, god damn it! [gets shocked again] Dr. Vosknocker: Now I want you to say "big floppy donkey dick". Cartman: No! [to audience] Dr. Vosknocker: Success! The child doesn't want to swear! [to audience] Cartman: This isn't fair, you sons of bi-- [gets shocked repeatedly]

Cartman: Don't call me fat, you fucking jew! Mr. Garrison: Eric, did you just say the F-word? Cartman: Jew? Kyle: No, he's talking about "fuck". You can't say "fuck" in school, you fucking fat-ass! Cartman: Why the fuck not? Mr. Garrison: Eric! Stan: Dude, you just said "fuck" again! Mr. Garrison: Stanley! Kenny: Fuck! Mr. Garrison: Kenny! Cartman: What's the big deal? It doesn't hurt anybody. Fuck-fuckety-fuck-fuck-fuck. Mr. Garrison: How would you like to go see the school councelor? Cartman: How would you like to suck my balls? Mr. Garrison: What did you say? Cartman: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Actually, what I said was... [picks up a megaphone] HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SUCK MY BALLS? Stan: Holy shit, dude.

[Reviewing list of dirty words the children have been saying] Mrs. Broflovski: Rimjob? Whats a rimjob? Mrs. Cartman: Oh, it's when someone puts your legs over your head and licks your anus.

[To Phillip] Terrance: This is worse than the time when I fell asleep and you put your dick in my mouth and took a picture.

Brooke Shields: I once farted on the set of Blue Lagoon.

Howard McGillin: They may cut your dick in half / And serve it to a pig. / And though it hurts you'll laugh / And dance a dickless jig.

Cartman: Kyle, all those times I said you were a dumb, stupid Jew, well, I was wrong, you're not a Jew. Kyle: Cartman, I *am* Jewish! Cartman: There, there, don't be hard on yourself, Kyle.

Cartman: That movie has warped my fragile little mind.

Cartman: Mom? If you were in a German Scheisse video, you... you'd tell me, wouldn't you? [short pause] Mrs. Cartman: Sure, hon.

Cartman: Yes, that's right, I saw the Terrance and Phillip movie. Now who wants to touch me?

Chef: Ain't you heard of the emmancipation proclamation? General: I don't listen to hip-hop.

Dr. Doctor: We accidentally replaced your heart with a baked potato. You have about three seconds to live.

Steve Sutton Springfield, GA, USA - MILLENNIUM 2001 - Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/

Steve Sutton wrote...

Thanks for posting that, but some of my favorites were missing. I'll try to fill in some of the gaps.

Mrs. McCormick: Fine. You go ahead and miss church. But when you die and go to Hell, you can answer to SATAN!!!! Kenny: Okay.

Doctor: Son, we've accidentally replaced your heart with a baked potato. You have about three seconds to live.

Mothers Against Canada: We must blame them and raise a fuss/ before somebody thinks of blaming us.

Sheila Broslofski: Remember the message of the Motion Picture Association of America: horrific, deplorable violence is okay, as long as no one says any naughty words.