I Know What You Did Last Week - Part 4 by Andi
(Mr.Garrison's class) Stan: Okay, Fat-Ass, this has gone too far. What the Hell does Nora know about you? Kyle: Yeah, what? Cartman: Heh, like I'm gonna tell you dumb-ass losers. Stan: We won't help you if you don't tell us.. Cartman: Ah don't care! As if Nora is gonna have her own little army.. (Suddenly, Nora walks in, holding the bag of Cheesier Poofs.) Cartman: Goddammit, why does she pop up every time ah say her name?! Nora: Hello children. (Tweek looks up in admiration.) Tweek: Ahhhh! Hi Noraaaaaaaaahhh!! Clyde: Um, hi. Nora: (smiles sweetly) Do you know why I'm here? Stan: Uh, 'cause we have school? Nora: NO! Because I want to let Tubby know I have my own little army. Cartman: Aw, sonuvabitch!! Nora: Let me introduce them to you. Bebe, my general. (Bebe enters wearing a black headband, camoflauge and some dogtags, holding a water gun.) Bebe: Sir, yes sir! Nora: Terri, my first aid nurse. (The redheaded girl enters in a white outfit with a hat like the one Nurse Gollem wears, complete with a plastic dead fetus on the side, carrying a play doctor's kit.) Terri: Hey. Nora: Wendy, my fashion designer, manacurist, hairdresser, maid, secretary, and person that puts those teeny little umbrella thingies in my frappacinos. (Wendy enters looking kind of like she did in Tom's Rhinoplasty, except her hair isn't frizzed and she isn't wearing eyeshadow, carrying a makeup kit.) Wendy: Hi Stan! (Stan pukes) Wendy: Eww! Nora: See, I have an army. Kyle: Why does she get all the puns?! Nora: 'Cause I'm hella cool, that's why! Stan: Goddammit, you're sounding like Cartman! Nora: Then, I'll sound like.. Lit. (she grabs a microphone, the lights go out, and a big blue spotlight goes on Nora.) ((I don't remember all the words to this song exactly, so please don't criticize =)) Nora: Wendy's brother was watching Say What yesterday, so I learned this beautiful song. (clears her throat) Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk. I didn't mean to call you that. I don't remember what was said or what you threw at me. Please tell me! Please tell me whyyyyyyyyyyyy. My car is in the front yard, and I'm, sleeping with my clothes on! I came in through the window! And, you're gone.. It's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy. 'Cause every now and then I kick the living sh*bleep*t outta me. The smoke alarm has gone off now and there's a cigerrate-- (Mr.Garrison walks in) Mr.G: Nora, MTV has been brainwashing you. (sighs sadly) Take your seat. (Nora sits while the other kids stare at her with wide eyes, frightened.) Nora: What? (she pauses a minute, then gets a big evil grin.) Heyyyyyy! (What?) Nora: (fake sweetness) Miss Writer Creator Duder Person? Can this be a musical? (No.) Nora: WHY THE HELL NOT?! (Like that's going to help.) Nora: Daria got her own musical! (pause) Well, I'll sing anyway. (You remember the movie Clueless?) Nora: Um, yeah.. (I'll glue one of those big floppy hats to your head.) Nora: I'LL BE GOOD!! (That's my girl.) Nora: (rolls her eyes) This is getting way too weird. (It's called writer's block. I make up stuff as I go along.) Cartman: Ah call it a dumb-f*bleep*ck hippie writer with too much goddamn time on her hands! Nora: Amen! (Cartman and Nora share a smile a moment) Cartman: For once, we actually agree on something! (No, you have to fight. That's the plot!) Nora: Oh yeah? Well.. Well.. GO SCREW BILL GATES! (Look, you guys, this is really messing up the fic. Just follow the script and I won't have to pop up all the time.) Nora: F*bleep* your script! (goes over to Cartman and kisses him) HA! As much as I hate Tubby here, I'd bang him, Hell, I'd bang the whole goddamn school, just to piss you off!!! I say, we, as South Park characters, form a RESISTANCE! Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny: Yeah! Rest of Class + Mr.Garrison: Yeah! Nora: (sticks her tongue out at Andi) Bite me. (I can't, I'm not a cartoon. But, I CAN get a rabid turkey to bite you.) Nora: Uh.. (backs off) (Plus, you little plagarist, you copied the resistance thingy from the movie trailer) Stan: No we didn't!
To be Continued.. ~*~AnDi~*~ "T.. T is for turtle!" "Damn the smurfs! Damn ALLLL THE SMURFS!!" "Your sticks and stones can break my bones, but my words will drive you insane." "Dude.. I AM your father." "NOOO!"