I remember an episode before 1997 (when I stopped watching television) in which a Krusty The Clown doll asks "Wanna peek?". Of course, the Simpsons illustrate why "sick" is the new "cool". How would Krusty cover his ass on this one? The line is ambiguous, because it is just a doll, right? What would happen if principal Skinner witnessed "Wanna peek?" spewing from Krusty the doll? So a kid takes a doll up on the offer and a look of surprise tells us it is anatomically correct. The kid shows Skinner. Skinner gets on the phone to Krusty, whose cell-phone number is naturally on Skinner's speed dial.
Skinner: Why in the name of hell did you release a pedophilic doll? Krusty: Started as a prank in the office, but I got tuh thinkin' how I could cover my ass an' get the real McCoy caught and jailed. Skinner: WTF are you talking about. Krusty: Nothin' happened, Skinner, so wise up. Parents tell children not to talk to strangers. How far does that go? Skinner: Uh...by the time you introduce them to their uncle, who is the most likely perp, then make exceptions for teachers and cops...uh...nowhere. Krusty: Well, listen. I got this pedophilia innoculation program running at Kamp Krusty. It's the only thing I run there at my own expense. I shit you not, Skinner. I'm paying for it. You should see my legal bills. I house a real pedophile on day parole. It's part of his conditions: Continuous surveillance. Whenever he is not in view of three psychologists on my staff, he is on camera, being watched. Skinner: So, how does the rest of the deal go? Krusty: Every time I get a call from somebody about a perverted doll, I expose kids to this real McCoy. Kids go home with a card that has a picture of our perp on one side, and my lawyer's phone number on the other. If my lawyer *don't* get a call, then the kids go through my little house of horrors again. They gotta rat to get out of it for good, see? Skinner: So, what happens if they do rat? Krusty: My lawyer de-briefs the parents and warns them...tells them to pay close attention to any stories about anybody else. Hey, and you already told me it's uncles that are bent. Skinner: Your case rests with me. No billing, huh? In Loco Parentis, I'll release a few kids into Kamp Krusty. Can we start with Bart? If it works the wrong way, then nobody will believe him, anyway? Krusty: Nope. Each kid tells their own story, and it adds up the same way, comprendez? I want the kid who reported the doll. Gotta keep my expenses down. There's half a million dolls out there, and I get a call every day about this. All I'm ever gonna do is cover my ass on this, Skinner.