Best lines

Dec 18, 1992, 2:34 PM ET1 post by 1 poster
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newberg68

Since I have only been reading this newsgroup for the last two weeks, I probably missed any summary of best Seinfeld lines from people. If anyone wants to relay their favorites, I would be welcome to hear them.

Some lines that had me rolling for hours afterwards:

1. In the airport, first-class/coach episode:
    Captured murderer: Do you know what I would do to you if I wasn't in these
shackles?
    George: But ya aaaaaaaaaaaaare in the shackles, aren't you? That's right.
Ya aaaaaaaaaaare in the shackles.
2. In the Nipple/pick episode:
  A.  George: And then I thought of it.
      Jerry and Elaine: Thought of what?
      George: The pick.  She comes out of the bathroom, I'm in up to my wrist.

B. Elaine on the phone talking about her 10 year old nephew(?): Yes, I know how old he is. It's what? Well, check under his mattress.

C. Calvin Klein: You know, you're very graceful. Kramer: Why, yes. I am.

3. In "the contest" episode:
    George's mom: I don't understand why you even bothered to come here.  I'm
so hungry. Can't you just get me a sandwich?
    George: Here. Have some tic-tacs.
4. In the nazi limo episode:
  A.  Male nazi: You know, you don't look like a Murphy.
      Jerry: I may not look like a Murphy, but I act like a Murphy.
      Male nazi: Where are you originally from?
      Jerry immediately taking on an accent: Dublin.
      Male nazi: You sound more Scottish.
      Jerry: We were right on the border.
      Male nazi: Why'd you leave.
      Jerry: Oh, cereal famine. Terrible tragedy. Couldn't get a bowl.
  B.  George: Did you see the way she looked at me?
      Jerry: She's a nazi, George!
      George: But she's a nice nazi.
  • Bubble boy episode: A. George: I'm sorry, but the correct answer is 'moops'.
  B.  In trying to get Naomi to stop laughing as it is incredibly annoying:
       Jerry: That's not funny.
       Naomi laughs again.
       Jerry, angry: It's not funny.
       Naomi: "The Naked Gun" is on tonight. That just makes me laugh and
laugh. Wanna watch it.
       Jerry: Nope.
       Naomi: Why? I thought you were a happy-go-lucky guy.
       Jerry: No. I'm not happy.  I'm not lucky.  I don't even go.  I'm just a
sad-stay put-unlucky type of guy.  I hear "Holocaust" is on TV.
6. In the first episode:
     Woman: And you are?
     George: Oh, I'm George. I'm (pointing around at the building structure) an
architect.
     Woman: Oh. And what do you design?
     Meanwhile Jerry is staring at George as if yo ask the same question.
     George: Railroads.
     Woman: I thought engineers did that.
     George: Oh, they can do that too.
One last one, before I go-  back to the airport episode:
    George: These are Supersavers. They're non-refundable.  We were going to
return these.
    Kramer: Well, the saleslady convinced me that they were a great deal.

If anybody has some to add, feel free. Thanks all, Brad "Murphy" Newberg