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---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------ Chicago Suntimes Sunday, January 18, 1998 By Richard Roeper
I've conjured up three possible plot scenarios for the last "Sienfeld".
- "Jerry's Demise"
Engrossed in the latest "Superman" comic, Jerry doesn't realize he is narrowly avoiding catastrophe as he goes through his day. A bus just misses him, an armed robber can't get his attentioon, a piano falls and lands just behind him. Once safely inside his apartment, Jerry opens a pack of Chuckles and happily hcomps on them, one at a time--but the fifth Chuckle, the evil yellow Chuckle, gets lodged in his throat, and he chokes to death. "He choked on a Chuckle??" is the reaction from a stunned George. "HE CHOKED ON A CHUCKLE! Jerry doesn't even like Chuckles! What was he thinking! Like I have a suit to wear to the funneral."
At Jerry's funeral , Elaine and George and Dramer promise they'll meet in one week at Monk's Diner--but they realize that w/out Jerry as the "centerpiece guy," the remaining three have nothing in common. A week later, the table at Monk's is empty.
Elaine is at work, trying hard to cultivate new relationships with co-workers who keep saying, "Why do you want to hang out with me, what happened to you weirdo buddies" George is on vacation with his parents, and hie's miserable. "he never liked Chuckles," George keeps saying, until his father swats him and says, "STOP MUMBLING!" Kramer sits alone in his apartment, ignoring the dancing Newman, who is singing a song he call's "Jerry's Dead".
The desperate Kramer bursts into the apartment formerly occupied by Jerry--and there's David Letterman in full creepy guy mode, wearing a bathrobe and hi-top sneakers, smoking a cigar and watching TV. "Hey Skippy, my name's Rhonda and I'm your new neighbor!" says Dave. The frightened Kramer stumbles out of the apartment, never to return. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------- SEND RICHARD ROEPER YOUR IDEAS, IN 100 WORDS OR LESS FOR THE SERIES CLOSER. THE ADDRESS IS 401 N. WABASH, CHICAGO 60611; OR YOU CAN EMAIL AT: [email] .