kramer

which episodes of seinfeld do you find kramer to be at his best? at his worst?

Favorites: Kramer sitting with Elaine's shrink, asking for exotic coffee beverages. Any time he plays someone else: the cop retrieving the statue, Pennypacker, Dr. Van Nostren....any others? The opening sequence when Jerry goes out for a set and Kramer rides a bike in the apartment, impersonates Jerry with a wooden spoon, hooks a hose up to the sink, has a tea party.... Any time he gives completely wrong advice.

My all time favorite Kramer moment is when he talks Jerry out of getting married in "The Engagement"

JERRY: I had a very interesting lunch with GEORGE: Costanza today. KRAMER: Really? JERRY: We were talking about our lives and we both kind of realized we're kids. We're not men. KRAMER: So, then you asked yourselves, "Isn't there something more to life?" JERRY: Yes. We did. KRAMER: Yeah, well, let me clue you in on something. There isn't. JERRY: There isn't? KRAMER: Absolutely not. I mean, what are you thinking about, JERRY:? Marriage? Family? JERRY: Well... KRAMER: They're prisons. Man made prisons. You're doing time. You get up in the morning. She's there. You go to sleep at night. She's there. It's like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom. Is it all right if I use the bathroom now? JERRY: Really? KRAMER: Yeah, and you can forget about watching TV while you're eating. JERRY: I can? KRAMER: Oh, yeah. You know why? Because it's dinner time. And you know what you do at dinner? JERRY: What? KRAMER: You talk about your day. How was your day today? Did you have a good day today or a bad day today? Well, what kind of day was it? Well, I don't know. How about you? How was your day? JERRY: Boy. KRAMER: It's sad , Jerry. It's a sad state of affairs.. JERRY: I'm glad we had this talk. KRAMER: Oh, you have no idea.

two of my favorite scenes are when kramer's talking about postal insurance for jerry's stereo ("it's a write-off for them") and also in the puerto rican day when kramer is trying to talk jerry into leaving the car in the street and then collecting the insurance ("what's your deductable?...because they've already deducted it....")

dave

Classic K-man:(The Red Dot)

ELAINE: What about one drink? Would you smell it from one drink?

JERRY: Yes you would.

(Kramer enters)

JERRY: I'll prove it. Would you do me a favor?

KRAMER: Okay.

JERRY: Would you take a drink and let us smell you?

KRAMER: You can smell me without the drink.

ELAINE: I suspect that this guy I'm seeing might be drinking but I can't smell it.

KRAMER: Okay, well what am I drinking? What do you got?

JERRY: I got a bottle of scotch my uncle gave me. It's Hennigans. It's been here for two years. I've been using it as a paint thinner.

(Kramer drinks.)

KRAMER: All right.

(Elaine and Jerry lean up really close to him.)

JERRY: I don't smell anything.

ELAINE: Maybe we're too close to the bottle.

(Jerry's buzzer buzzes.)

JERRY: Yeah.

GEORGE: (over the speaker) It's George.

JERRY: Come on up.

KRAMER: That is *damn* good scotch. I could do a commercial for this stuff. Mmmmm, boy that Hennigans goes down smooth. And afterwords you don't even smell. That's right folks. I just had three shots of Hennigans and I don't smell. Imagine, you can walk around drunk all day. That's Hennigans, the no-smell, no-tell scotch.

GEORGE: Hello everybody.

KRAMER: Hey. (snuggling really close to George) I'm going to tell you what I think. I know you don't care what I think, but I'm going to tell you. I think that you are terrific.

(lines deleted)

KRAMER: Say you got a big job interview, and you're a little nervous. Well throw back a couple shots of Hennigans and you'll be as loose as a goose and ready to roll in no time. And because it's odorless, why, it will be our little secret. (singing) h-e-double n...

JERRY: Kramer. Yeah that'll do.