New Yorkers are NOT rude

Let's just take a step back for a second. Its NOT that New Yorkers are rude. They just are very direct and have a low tolerance for incompetence. In places like Southern California, incompetence is pretty much everywhere. New Yorkers have no patience for it and they will let you know DIRECTLY rather than walk on eggshells and tiptie around someone who is acting stupidly. Which is what they do in SoCal. I lived there for a few years and I almost wanted to kill a pizza guy who asked me if it was "...whoa, two slices dude?" that I wanted after I told him three times.

In article , [email] (Dave Block) wrote:

When I visit New York City and am walking down the sidewalk, I'm frequently bumped, cut-off, or otherwise jostled by the natives. (They never apologize or say "Excuse me," BTW.) Should I interpret this as meaning that I'm an incompetent walker, and all New Yorker are more competent walkers than I am?

Please help us, the less competent, understand.

Doctor Fang wrote:

Well, I don't remember experiencing that the last few times I was in New York, which means absolutely nothing.

All I can say is that my entire family is originally from the Bronx (we left when I was a baby) and my parents have tended to make friends with other native New Yorkers over the years. I have always thought that New Yorkers are generally friendlier, more outgoing, and easier to talk and laugh with than the rest of the general population.

Anyone else notice this?

-Jen

"Jennifer M. Blaske" wrote:

Absolutely! I believe the reason is that New Yorkers are not comfortable with "surface" friendships. They seem to have a low tolerance for "fake" behavior, they want to ingratiate themselves with others quickly so they can be themselves and relax. I think this comes from the culture of New York which breeds confidence in the abilities of its citizens. Its sink or swim here in NYC, and that puts New Yorkers in the top 5% of humanity by default. Unlike Los Angeles where everyone I met had enormous egos yet hated themselves at the same time, as if they said "I hate myself, but I am the most important self in the world."

--Dave Block

In article , [email] says...

Oh yeah, this puts things in perfect perspective.

Alan

[email] (Missy) wrote:

Now you are getting personal. I was speaking in general terms regarding Los Angeles vs. New York. But since you are getting personal, let me tell you a story. After being in LA for the first few days, a friend and former New Yorker told me this: "Dave, you won't realize this for maybe a couple of years, but trust me it is true: I've been here for 5 years. You are a very big fish in a very small pond." I looked at him and said, "What? Los Angeles is a huge city! What do you mean?!?!" And he told me, "Los Angeles is a little nothing town. You are from New York. You have it totally together compared to everyone out here. You are stable, you have a great job, you like yourself, you are a responsible person. These are qualities that are rare here in LA..." And he was right. I didnt realize it until about my second year there. He was completely correct. And what was really strange was that whenever I went back to visit New York, EVERYONE in NY thought I was this totally hip guy from LA. With my tan and shades. I would look up to see other women looking at me, it blew my mind a bit. Inside I was the same stupid shmuck from NY that I always was, but somehow I was special because of LA. New Yorker's think it is glamorous. What a load of crap! (For those of you who care, my company moved me out there, and they moved me back too)

Dave Block wrote:

<snip>

WHAT??? Top 5% of humanity? We're all in touble if that's true.

You gotta be KIDDING!!! If you can understand them thru that obnoxious accent, the ones I have met have been incredibly rude.

I just wanted to say, that I think the rudeness factor all depends on the person. I was taught that people treat you how you treat them. I frequently visit big cities where the citizens have a reputation as being rude, but, I suppose because I am a friendly person, I have never once encountered anymore rude people, than in any other city I have visited-big or small. As a matter of fact, my sister, who has a major Georgia accent, visited NY this summer and went to a Trendy, popular restaurant that is supposed to be impossible to get in, and by the end of the meal the owner was sitting at her table buying her drinks!!!! I just wanted to add this point of view to the list! :)

TElmgren "Smile and the world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone."

<<Let's just take a step back for a second. Its NOT that New Yorkers are rude. They just are very direct and have a low tolerance for incompetence. In places like Southern California, incompetence is pretty much everywhere. New Yorkers have no patience for it and they will let you know DIRECTLY rather than walk on eggshells and tiptie around someone who is acting stupidly. Which is what they do in SoCal. I lived there for a few years and I almost wanted to kill a pizza guy who asked me if it was "...whoa, two slices dude?" that I wanted after I told him three times. >>

AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I live in South Florida for the past 2 yrs (from NYC) and I tell friends/family all the time how rude people are here. You can hold a door for man/woman and no thank you. Also, when you talk to folks here they are comprhending your 1st sentence while you are on the 5th. Like I say all the time NYrs are straight and to the point. They tell it like it is. If that's rude I'd rather be rude than 'fake'.

[email] (Missy) wrote:

Thanks for your opinion, but I think you should stick to the subject. Every city has its share of overcrowding and filth. The subject was rudeness, I want to hear your opinion about that, OK?

Those dumps are unrealistically large. On their salaries they would be in much smaller apartments or not in the city at all. The TV people know that viewers would be uncomfortable watching the characters living in realistically sized New York apartments so they take liberties with that aspect of the show.

Alan

A low tolerance for incompetence is one thing. Telling me to "Buy your own f**kin' watch!!" when I ask for the time is another.

Missy, may I ask where you live now that you are no longer in NY?

If NY is such a wonderful place and NYers are such wonderful people, why the hell do they all move to Calif?

[email] (JKlompas) wrote:

I think brain damage is responsible....(joke). I moved out because of work and money. I was doing circles around all those laid back LA People. It took me a few months just to learn how to walk slowly. (I also had to buy loud clothing to blend in with everyone there.)

I think NYkers are attracted to the glamour, and the sunshine. Many also move there to rebuild their lives. Where else do you go when your house burns down, your wife leaves you, you lose your job, or you realize you were actually gay all along?

Dave Block wrote: Where else do you go when

You go to Nashville and write country music. ;-)

Frankly, maybe it's from living in Chicago all my life, but I can't take anyone too who chooses where they live based solely on weather. I mean, buy a damn coat!

Screw that. I live in Ft. Lauderdale FL. It's 79 degrees and sunny right now. What's it like where you live?

[email] (Dave) wrote:

I have to agree -- I based my decision on where to live largely -- but not solely -- on the weather. The deciding factor is being far enough south to avoid winter. Where in the south is negotiable.

The remark the Chicago guy made (the person you replied to) reminded me of someone in NY who said that, if I don't like winter, I should take up winter sports. Never could find the logic in that one. By moving south, I can avoid a coat for 10 months of the year -- which for me was a much better solution. Glad you're warm in Ft. Lauderdale. Pretty darn warm here in Texas too. Bet it's still cold in Chicago.

Hey everyone, let's calm down a bit. We WATCH the show because we like the characters, and part of what we like about them is their New York-ish-ness, isn't it? Let's enjoy it! It's not a question of good and better. Other shows or movies showcase other areas of the country. Heck, I think North Carolina is the best state in the Union, but I still really like the New Yorkers on "Seinfeld."

All I'm saying is that we can unite around one theme, even if we do disagree as to what "rude" means... Reminds me of one of my FAVE lines, from Part One of "The Keys." (Jerry is bringing his girl back to the apartment, but Kramer is inside.) Jerry's playing a game of "racing to get away from the attackers." The girl says, "I'm from Wichita."

Emily

How come every NYC-based sitcom has a neighbor who constantly bursts into other people's apartments uninvited and unannounced, e.g., Kramer on Seinfeld, Annie on Caroline in the City, etc.?

New Yorkers in real life are actually rather polite, but they rarely burst into each other's apartments uninvited and unannounced--- especially when they're also unarmed!

[email] (JKlompas) wrote:

They all don't move to CA.

You think New Yorkers are rude? I tell you what pal, stay the hell out of Seattle!

We've gotten a little tired of being portrayed as passive granolaheads in three layers of Eddie Bauer. It's a bit done. Where I come from, we'll not only cut your nose off to spite your face, we'll feed it to you as an appetizer, followed by your genitals in a rich cream sauce!

Anyway, New Yorkers are easily the rudest bastards on earth. I worked with one. She was like bamboo shoots under the nails.

[email] (DShort001) wrote:

Why are you directing that tirade at me? I know you directed it to me, because you sent me a copy by e-mail. I did NOT say New Yorkers are rude and I did NOT say New Yorkers are not rude. You made a mistake in posting your reply agains the wrong posting. It makes a difference, you know.

I avoid making personal attacks against people in the newsgroups (I know, djk thinks I made one at him, and if so, I appologize). All I said is that all the NY-bashing was starting to piss me off. Just a statement of opinion -- the opinion being that we shouldn't attack each other. None of us are any better, smarter, more important than anyone else here.

PLEASE be more careful how you thread your replies in the future, since I am obviously not the person who made the remarks that you are objecting to.

On Sat, 5 Apr 1997, debbie wrote:

While it's true that nobody on this ng is any better or more important than anyone else, I am smarter than most of you! Right Missy? Anyway, I empathize with your frustration, Debbie. I absolutely hate it when people attribute statements to me that I never actually made. Usenet is not that complicated, people. If you can't figure out who said what, you have no business responding at all.

I live in Washington, D.C. - how do you think I feel, with every movie and TV show portraying Washingtonians as politically crazed and conspiratorial?? I mean, the vast majority of citizens in the metropolitan area are just normal folks - but when people from other places in AMerica (let alone foreigners!) here I live in downtown Washington, they think I'm a cross between Geena Davis in "Long Kiss Goodnight," Vanessa Williams in "Eraser," and John Dean's wife!

We all have to put up with city stereotypes, sorry!

Emily

P.S. Since New York and DC are the absolute centers of civilization in our proud country, and we reap those benefits, I'd say we should endure a bit of ragging!

[email] (Dave Block) wrote:

As a Native NYer, I have to agree that what many people perceive as rude is in fact, people being direct and to the point. As for people getting run over, anyone who is in a hurry is going to breeze by you, not just New Yorkers. The hustle and bustle is what makes the city - people to see, places to go, things to do. Re:accents - I went to school in New England, and people I met couldn't get enough of it, asking me to say "water" "dog" and to do Coffee Talk skits from SNL. Between that and the millions of people that visit our fine fair city, I'd say that someone likes us.

You know, "being direct and to the point" CAN be a form of rudeness, as well as "saying it the way it is".

[email] (Doctor Fang) wrote:

native josting is a major at the New School for Social Research. Buts lets give NYcity some credit for great rude albeit rude servers. (hi buster) Missy "When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you." I _am_ a native New Yorker, and I get jostled. People are just always in a hurry and in a city that size, it's impossible not to get bumped once in a while. I don't think people looked at you, said "Ooh! Tourist!" and then smacked into you. Just my 2 cents. :) --Steph

I've been to New York several times and I never felt New Yorkers were rude, they're in a rush, that's different. Philadelphia is another story...

[email]. (djk) wrote:

Like what? I rarely post any opinions any more. And I am from NY, born and raised, family still lives there.

Apparently some dimwits are having a hard time wth the concept of sarcasm. Look in the dictionary somewhere between "sap" and "stupid". Then get over yourself as soon as you possibly can.

UGH!! How Ruuuuuuuuuude!!!!! ;)

I rest my case.