What to do when you have the urge

When the temptation to masturbate is strong, yell stop to those
thoughts as loudly as you can
     in your mind and then recite a pre-chosen scripture or sing an
inspirational hymn. It is
     important to turn your thoughts away from the selfish need to
indulge.
   Set goals of abstinence, begin with a day, then a week, month,
year, and finally commit to
     never doing it again. Until you commit yourself to never again
you will always be open to
     temptation.

(tick . . . tick . . . tick . . . tick . . .)

Or, try the new "Pud Patch" <www.letthechickenbreathe.com>

Scene from the upcoming t.v. commercial: <frantic worker to calm co-worker> "We're all going down to the men's room.....to........y'know................................coming??" <calm worker> "No thanks, I think I'll just stay here and work" <frantic worker> "What?? did you get LAID last night..........or something?? How can you be so CALM???" <calm worker> Calm?? Hehe, or in CONTROL!! Thanks to THIS (rolls up pants leg) My new PUD PATCH!" <frantic worker> "Pud Patch??" (pulls on sweaty hair) "But does it work?? <calm worker> "I'll say! Plus, from the savings alone on Kleenex--- it pays FOR ITSELF!" <frantic worker> "Pud Patch, huh?........catchy" Announcer: "Pud Patch!...................give the wrist a rest!"

Steve wrote:

Go to White Castle�...just like the comercial sez.

Panhead wrote in message ...

you idiot. i think that says it all