Season 7 report card

Mar 7, 19974 posts by 4 postersalt.tv.seinfeld
😂 Loved it
4 posts
111. The Engagement 9/21/95 Grade:A-
          George and Jerry agree to change their lives so George get
engaged to Susan. Elaine
          wants to get rid of a barking dog so she gets Kramer and
Neuman to help.
     112. The Postponement 9/28/95 Grade:A+
          Geroge gets Susan to postpone the wedding date. Elaine is
jelous of George and
          confides in a rabbi who lives in her building. He then
procedes to tell everyone.
          Kramer sneaks Cafe Late into the theater and spills it all
over himslef.
     113. The Maestro 10/5/95 Grade:A
          Kramer sues the coffee shop because the Cafe Late was too hot.
Elaine dates a man
          who insists on being called the Maestro. George thinks a
security guard should be
          allowed to sit down. Jerry rents a house in Tuscany.
     114. The Wink 10/12/95 Grade:A
          George gets squirted in the eye by a grapefruit and can't stop
winking at all the
          inappropriate times. Jerry tries not to eat meat while dating
Elaine's cousin. Elaine's
          wake up service goes bad when she starts dating the caller.
     115. The Hot Tub 10/19/95 Grade:A+
          Jerry tries to help Elaine's friend make it to the marathon on
time. Kramer gets a hot
          tub. George acts annoyed so that he looks busy at work. He
then meets with some
          bastards from Texas.
     116. The Soup Nazi 11/2/95 Grade:A+
          Everyone wants soup from a guy with very strict ordering
procedures. George and
          Elaine are bothered by how affectionate Jerry is with his new
girlfriend. Elaine buys an
          armour, gets it stolen, and then gets one that belonged to the
Soup Nazi that contains
          all his recipes.
     117. The Secret Code 11/9/95 Grade:A+
          George won't tell anyone his ATM code. Jerry's foot keeps
falling asleep and it gets
          him in trouble with a handicapped store owner. Kramer tries to
help the fire
          department. Elaine is interested in a boring guy just because
he forgets her.
     118. The Pool Guy 11/16/95 Grade:A+
          Jerry gets rid of annoying pool attendant who wants to be his
friend. Elaine and Susan
          go out and George's worlds are colliding. Kramer becomes the
movie guide.
     119. The Sponge 12/7/95 Grade:A
          Elaine has to be picky about her partners when her birth
control is in short supply.
          George has to tell Susan everything. Kramer walks for AIDS but
refuses to wear the
          red ribbon.
     120. The Gum 12/14/95 Grade:A
          Kramer opens an old movie theater and befriends a childhood
friend of George's (see
          The Non-Fat Yogart) that had a nervous breakdown. Kramer
forces Jerry to help by
          wearing glasses and buying gum. Elaine tries not to lead the
guy on because she feels
          partly responsible for the breakdown. Another old friend of
George's thinks he's is
          mentally ill.
     121. The Rye 1/4/96 Grade:A+
          Geroge tries to replace a rye bread that his father took back
from Susan's parents
          after their dinner. Elaine is dating a musician and word gets
back to him that she thinks
          they are Hot-n-Heavy.
     122. The Caddy 1/25/96 Grade:A
          After locking his keys in his car, it's constant presence in
the employee parking lot
          makes George look like a hard worker. Elaine get's a bra-less
friend a bra and she
          wears it as a top, causing Kramer to wreck George's car.
     123. The Seven 2/1/96 Grade:A-
          George tells Susan he wants to name his kid Seven. Jerry dates
a girl who always
          wears the same dress. Elaine buys a little girls bike but then
has to give it to Kramer
          because he fixes her neck. Kramer runs a tab for the stuff he
takes from Jerry.
     124. & 125. The Cadilac 2/8/96 Grade:A
          Everyone is surprised at how much money Jerry makes. Jerry
buys his father a Cadilac
          and then Morty gets impeached because they think he has been
stealing. George gets
          fixed up with Morissa Tomei. Kramer keeps the cable man
waiting.
     126. The Shower Head 2/15/96 Grade:A+
          Jerry's parents won't go back to Florida because George
convinced his parents to
          move there. Elaine tests positive for Opium several times
because she is eating poppy
          seeds. Low-Flow shower heads are installed in the building and
Jerry and Kramer
          don't like it.
     127. The Doll 2/22/96 Grade:A
          Susan has a doll that resembles George's mother. Jerry carries
a package home for a
          friend of Susan's and he breaks his BBQ sauce that he was
using for a bit. Frank turns
          George's room into a pool hall and the Maestro and Kramer play
in their underwear.
          Elaine tries to get an autograph of the third tenor.
     128. The Friar's Club 3/7/96 Grade:A
          George sets Jerry up with Susan's cousin. Jerry suspects
gypsies of taking a jacket he
          was borrowing. Elaine thinks a co-worker is faking a hearing
disability to get out of
          work. Kramer tries a new sleeping pattern.
     129. The Wig Master 4/4/96 Grade:A
          Jerry feels "immasculated" when people keep hitting on the
person he's with. A
          salesman uses a discount to keep Elaine. Kramer and George
invest in a cheap
          parking lot where their cars are used by hookers.
     130. The Calzone 4/28/96 Grade:A+
          Jerry dates a women who gets anything she wants. Elaine meets
a man who uses bets
          as a dating "hook". Kramer heats up clothes before putting
them on. George gets
          Steinbrenner hooked on Calzones but loses his supplier.
     131. & 132. The Bottle Deposit 5/2/96 Grade:B
          Elaine buys JFK's golf clubs for Mr. Peterman but leaves them
in the back of            Jerry's stolen car. Kramer and Newman try to
cart a mailtruck of bottles to           Michigan where
          the deposite is 10�. George has no idea what his assignment is
or who did it.
     133. The Wait Out 5/9/96 Grade:A
          A marriage Jerry and Elaine have been "waiting out" is
destroyed by George's           folksy remark. Kramer buys slim fit
jeans that he can't get off.
     134. The Invitations 5/16/96 Grade:A+
          George tries to figure out ways to get out of getting married.
Kramer calls Susan "Lilly"
          and now he and Elaine are nothing in the wedding. Jerry gets
engaged to someone just
          like him. Susan dies from licking the wedding invitations.

I think Kurt is guilty of "Grade Inflation". I don't even think Jerry Seinfeld himself would rate The Maestro as "A".