Seinfeld question

which is the episode where seinfeld says "i don't wanna be switzeralnd!"

i just watched the label maker episode and i didn't see it

"Arsenio" wrote in message news:ytoa8.6022$[email]...

it was cut in syndication.

Kramer: We have to put the board in a neutral place, where no one will tamper with it. Jerry: So that's here. ===================== Kramer: Yes, yes. You're like Switzerland. Jerry: I don't wanna be Switzerland. Kramer: Jerry. ===================== Kramer: Newman and I are engaged in an epic struggle for world domination.

the cut is about 6 seconds long

That's a shame.....

"Ozmodiar" wrote in message news:k6qa8.16421$[email]...

tamper with

domination.

"Arsenio" wrote in message news:l8ra8.7575$[email]...

Not on Paramount in the UK though. I saw it last week and it wasn't cut.

switzeralnd!"

What's wrong with the US? Cut Seinfeld Episodes, we don't cut anything out in Norway. I even heard that they wouldn't rerun the episode susen died of envelope licking after the anthrax scare. How sensetive can people get?

"jargon" wrote in message news:a4en70$3sp$[email]...

"Christian Wulff Hansen" wrote in message news:[email]...

i would've thought this particular cut was to save time and not censor. AFAIK there was no protest from offended Swiss-Americans. where's the outrage?

On Thu, 14 Feb 2002 08:37:38 GMT, "Ozmodiar" wrote:

As H.G. Wells said: "Never sacrifice a good commercial for the sake of the program."

Sophie

Easy there, Champ. Small cuts (like the one mentioned in this thread) are made in all sitcoms when they're prepared for syndication, to allow for an extra minute or two of commercials. Jerry even helped supervise what was to be cut from Seinfeld. Syndication packages (not to mention advertising practices) will obviously vary in different parts of the world.

It's amazing how many Europeans in this newsgroup are so quick to criticize the U.S. as a country when Columbia TriStar Distribution pulls an episode of Seinfeld to avoid public backlash (perceived or actual). You do realize there's a difference between a single television show distributor and the rest of the nation, right? That such decisions are made by corporations who own the broadcast rights, rather than the government or the general populace?

The irony, of course, is the criticism that such actions are censorship or a restriction of freedoms. What you fail to realize is that a company like CTTD is "free" to air or not air any and all episodes. If, in the true spirit of capitalism, they feel that a specific Seinfeld episode may potentially hurt profits, they don't air it. Obviously this doesn't happen often; it's only happened twice that I'm aware of.

"John Twernbold" wrote in message news:RLRa8.40541$[email]...

criticize

of

Well yes. And I have a lot of time for the American people. But CTD wouldn't pull the ep if they weren't afraid of getting a negative reaction. And that fear is based on an impression they have of the American people being particularly litigious and sensitive about political correctness. And if an American company has that impression, I think you can hardly blame us Europeans for thinking it must have some validity.

*And* if the US public felt as offended and patronised by that as some think they ought to be then they would kick up such a stink, that it would be financially onerous for a company like CTD *not* to show the ep. Therefore they would show it. Therefore the fact that they don't does reflect to some degree on the US people in general. QED (IMHO :))

-TF

"Tod Friendly" wrote"

Hmm? Sweet! Could you come over and clean my basement?

Squeeky wheel gets the grease. Or do you think all 300 million Americans are a part of the Puerto Rican community? It would be foolish to make assumptions about the American public as a whole based on one company's reaction to the political posturing of a small subgroup.

Is it really that important? I'm a huge Seinfeld fan and I don't particularly like the situation, but what do you think Joe Average (who doesn't watch Seinfeld regularly and doesn't even realize that an episode has been pulled from rotation) will do? Sorry, but there are bigger fish to fry. If people are going to take a dip in activism, I'd hope it was for the truly important issues. Compared to the very real problems we face in the modern world, this is a non-issue.

"John Twernbold" wrote in message news:bGXa8.389284$[email]...

Did I say "people". Sorry I just meant the chicks. :)

are

Don't want to get into a fight about it. But if a small group can have such an influence then that *does* reflect on the American public. But don't get me wrong - the British public are assholes as well.

These things happen as you rightly say because of a minority. I just think the minority ought to be representative of the majority - a microcosm of such. So for every PR with too much time on their hands who complains to the network there ought to be about 10 Joe (or Jane) Averages with too much time on their hands who do likewise but in favour of screening the show. And those 10 ought to have their view given priority. If they aren't - why? Certainly this is not a big deal. But I just think its disingenuous to act as if the non-showing of the PR Day episode says nothing about the US in general.

But you should see some of the comedy that comes out of where I come from in Belfast. What that crap says about my society I'd be too scared to even wonder.

-TF

Right, same here. Just a stimulating discussion--no wagers, no eye-gouging. :-)

The very fact that they're a minority would suggest that they're *not* representative of the majority. And in fact the the PR minority status is actually part of the reasoning behind CTTD's decision, since so many Americans (as members of the world's largest "melting pot") are very concerned with not offending minority groups of any kind. How far "PC" should go depends on personal opinion, of course, and there will always be disagreement. Again, don't get me wrong--I disagree with CTTD's decision to pull the PR Day episode. That said, I do understand their decision, and it has nothing to do with freedom of speech or censorship. As for the anthrax scare and envelope-licking episode... well, that's sheer idiocy. :-) Sept. 11 has really made some corporations pretty skittish, unfortunately.

Right, I hear ya'. But that's not the way people work, American or otherwise. The passions of the people offended by TV and film content will always run hotter than the desires of the cool-headed libertarians like you or me. And certainly groups like the ACLU will fight for similar ideals, although this specific case really isn't a matter for them since it's just a private corporation making a decision, however poorly influenced by some overblown sense of PC.

LOL! I know the feeling--I have some UK friends, and I'm continually amazed at the low-grade American trash TV that you guys get over there. With all the quality programming available, it's surprising you also get our worst shows, too.

"John Twernbold" wrote in message news:_DYa8.41218$[email]... [Agree to differ on main point]

amazed

What good US ones do you reckon we're missing? Father Ted is a v. good British/Irish one, although it's been over for a few years noe

Re trashy Northern Ireland, shows - if you ever get the opportunity to miss "Give My Head Peace" I would grab it with both hands.

-TF

Oh--I don't think you're missing any good shows. I was just surprised that in addition to the cream of the crop, you also see the really bad shows, too. :-)

Who's on first?

What? Ever? Jerry and George, The Pilot. Was that your question?

No!! Who's on second. What's on first!!!

<<<No!! Who's on second. What's on first!!!

I don't know.

^^^^^^ "Art is often hailed as the grandest expression of human spirit, but we know now ... that the grandest expression of human spirit is whatever it takes for a man or woman to rush back into a burning building to save more people."

"Art Vandelay" wrote in message news:[email]...

third base

On Thu, 14 Feb 2002 19:25:18 GMT, "Peener" wrote:

And I don't even know what I am talking about!

Okay, here's the whole thing! There have been a few version.  I think they honed
this a bit more for some of theiir movie and TV appearances.
====================================================================

Abbott & Costello ================= Abbott: Well Costello, I'm going to New York with you. The Yankee's manager gave me a job as coach for as long as your on the team.

Costello: Look Abbott, if your the coach, you must know all the players.

Abbott: I certainly do.

Costello: Well you know I've never met the guys. So you'll have to tell me their

names, and then I'll know who's playing on the team.

Abbott: Oh, I'll tell you their names, but you know it seems to me they give these ball players now-a-days very peculiar names.

Costello: You mean funny names?

Abbott: Strange names, pet names...like Dizzy Dean...

Costello: His brother Daffy

Abbott: Daffy Dean...

Costello: And their French cousin.

Abbott: French?

Costello: Goofe'

Abbott: Goofe' Dean. Well, let's see, we have on the bags, Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know is on third...

Costello: That's what I want to find out.

Abbott: I say Who's on first, What's on second, I Don't Know's on third.

Costello: Are you the manager?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: You gonna be the coach too?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: And you don't know the fellows' names.

Abbott: Well I should.

Costello: Well then who's on first?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: I mean the fellow's name.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy on first.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The first baseman.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy playing...

Abbott: Who is on first!

Costello: I'm asking you who's on first.

Abbott: That's the man's name.

Costello: That's who's name?

Abbott: Yes.

Costello: Well go ahead and tell me.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's who?

Abbott: Yes.

PAUSE

Costello: Look, you gotta first baseman?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: Who's playing first?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: When you pay off the first baseman every month, who gets the money?

Abbott: Every dollar of it.

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is the fellow's name on first base.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy that gets...

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Who gets the money...

Abbott: He does, every dollar of it. Sometimes his wife comes down and coll- ects it.

Costello: Who's wife?

Abbott: Yes.

PAUSE

Abbott: What's wrong with that?

Costello: I wanna know is when you sign up the first baseman, how does he sign his name?

Abbott: Who.

Costello: The guy.

Abbott: Who.

Costello: How does he sign...

Abbott: That's how he signs it.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Yes.

PAUSE

Costello: All I'm trying to find out is what's the guys name on first base.

Abbott: No. What's on second base.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first.

Costello: One base at a time!

Abbott: Well, don't change the players around.

Costello: I'm not changing nobody!

Abbott: Take it easy, buddy.

Costello: I'm only asking you, who's the guy on first base?

Abbott: That's right.

Costello: Ok.

Abbott: All right.

PAUSE

Costello: What's the guy's name on first base?

Abbott: No. What is on second.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first.

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's on third, we're not talking about him.

Costello: Now how did I get on third base?

Abbott: Why you mentioned his name.

Costello: If I mentioned the third baseman's name, who did I say is playing third?

Abbott: No. Who's playing first.

Costello: What's on base?

Abbott: What's on second.

Costello: I don't know.

Abbott: He's on third.

Costello: There I go, back on third again!

PAUSE

Costello: Would you just stay on third base and don't go off it.

Abbott: All right, what do you want to know?

Costello: Now who's playing third base?

Abbott: Why do you insist on putting Who on third base?

Costello: What am I putting on third.

Abbott: No. What is on second.

Costello: You don't want who on second?

Abbott: Who is on first.

Costello: I don't know.

Together: Third base!

PAUSE

Costello: Look, you gotta outfield?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The left fielder's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: I just thought I'd ask you.

Abbott: Well, I just thought I'd tell ya.

Costello: Then tell me who's playing left field.

Abbott: Who's playing first.

Costello: I'm not...stay out of the infield!!! I want to know what's the guy's name in left field?

Abbott: No, What is on second.

Costello: I'm not asking you who's on second.

Abbott: Who's on first!

Costello: I don't know.

Together: Third base!

PAUSE

Costello: The left fielder's name?

Abbott: Why.

Costello: Because!

Abbott: Oh, he's center field.

PAUSE

Costello: Look, You gotta pitcher on this team?

Abbott: Sure.

Costello: The pitcher's name?

Abbott: Tomorrow.

Costello: You don't want to tell me today?

Abbott: I'm telling you now.

Costello: Then go ahead.

Abbott: Tomorrow!

Costello: What time?

Abbott: What time what?

Costello: What time tomorrow are you gonna tell me who's pitching?

Abbott: Now listen. Who is not pitching.

Costello: I'll break your arm if you say who's on first!!! I want to know what's the pitcher's name?

Abbott: What's on second.

Costello: I don't know.

Together: Third base!

PAUSE

Costello: Gotta a catcher?

Abbott: Certainly.

Costello: The catcher's name?

Abbott: Today.

Costello: Today, and tomorrow's pitching.

Abbott: Now you've got it.

Costello: All we got is a couple of days on the team.

PAUSE

Costello: You know I'm a catcher too.

Abbott: So they tell me.

Costello: I get behind the plate to do some fancy catching, Tomorrow's pitching on my team and a heavy hitter gets up. Now the heavy hitter bunts the ball. When he bunts the ball, me, being a good catcher, I'm gonna throw the guy out at first. So I pick up the ball and throw it to who?

Abbott: Now that's the first thing you've said right.

Costello: I don't even know what I'm talking about!

PAUSE

Abbott: That's all you have to do.

Costello: Is to throw the ball to first base.

Abbott: Yes!

Costello: Now who's got it?

Abbott: Naturally.

PAUSE

Costello: Look, if I throw the ball to first base, somebody's gotta get it. Now who has it?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Naturally?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: So I pick up the ball and I throw it to Naturally.

Abbott: No you don't you throw the ball to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's different.

Costello: That's what I said.

Abbott: Your not saying it...

Costello: I throw the ball to Naturally.

Abbott: You throw it to Who.

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: That's what I said!

Abbott: You ask me.

Costello: I throw the ball to who?

Abbott: Naturally.

Costello: Now you ask me.

Abbott: You throw the ball to Who?

Costello: Naturally.

Abbott: That's it.

Costello: Same as you! Same as YOU!!! I throw the ball to who. Whoever it is drops the ball and the guy runs to second. Who picks up the ball and throws it to What. What throws it to I Don't Know. I Don't Know throws it back to Tomorrow, Triple play. Another guy gets up and hits a long fly ball to Because. Why? I don't know! He's on third and I don't give a darn!

Abbott: What?

Costello: I said I don't give a darn!

Abbott: Oh, that's our shortstop.

THE END

"The News Guy(Mike)" wrote in message news:[email]...

honed

[skit snipped for brevity's sake]

i'm about halfway through reading Heller's "Catch 22" for the very first time, and then i read the Who's On First skit. thanks. i didn't need to warp my brain anymore today but now i'm thoroughly sure i'm quite insane. should help me get through the rest of the book :)

If Minderbinder's explanation of 'the syndicate' doesn't boggle your mind, you have nothing to fear from Abbott and Costello. :-)

Dave ("That's some catch, that Catch-22.")

"Dave" wrote in message news:[email]...

they

i think it's just getting to that part (i was wrong; i'm only about 1/3 of the way through at this point)... 'the syndicate' (which i still have no idea about) just got it's very first mention in the chapter i read after reading your post, and as soon as i read it, i felt the hair on the back of my neck prick up. if someone actually *warns* you about some sort of lunacy coming up in this book, i figure it's gotta be a whammy :) it's getting to the point where i think i'll need to keep a strong drink nearby as i read. i'm disappointed in myself that i never read it before because i could immediately understand why it's considered a classic.

"JTD" wrote in message news:...

I'm glad you're enjoying it, as it's always been a favorite of mine. Every five years or so, I pick it up and reread it. It actually gets better in successive readings.

If you get a chance, see the film. It's an all-star cast, and it sticks extremely close to the book.

And there's a Seinfeld connection. Orr, the guy who crashes during every mission, was played by Bob Balaban, ie. Reussell Dalrymple, and Milo himself is played by the guy who's car George thought he bought.

Dave (no, not the periodontist.)

"The News Guy(Mike)" wrote in message news:[email]...

....

On Sat, 16 Feb 2002 08:49:35 GMT, "Ozmodiar" wrote:

Merci bien. C'est tr�s amusant.

On Wed, 13 Feb 2002 15:22:12 -0500, "Arsenio" wrote:

Who are you Bud Abbott? What are you calling me an idiot for?

Scott

What is this - an Abbot and Costello routine?

-TF