Capsule of a Seinfeld Taping

Oct 5, 1993, 10:52 AM ET2 posts by 2 posters
🧩 Trivia
2 posts
Bob Warznak

Here's an ecapsulated version of the trip report that I sent out to the Vandelay group.

--- Bob Warznak [email] Bell Communications Research (908) 699-2488

---
============================================================================
Episode #914 -- "The Taping"
Originally Aired:  Tuesday, September 14, 1993, 5:30PM-12:30AM
============================================================================
Production Credits:
    Written By  ...........................  Bob Warznak
============================================================================
Cast:
    Donna Tschetter (The Donna)  ..........  [email]
    George Bullard  .......................  [email]
    Andre Player ..........................  [email]
    Todd Pearson ..........................  [email]
    Estelle Westbury ......................  [email]
    Barb Sauer ............................  [email]
    Dottie Bybee ..........................  [email]
    David Silver ..........................  [email]
    Ken Gidley ............................  [email]
    Rich Shiek ............................  [email]
    Bob Warznak	...........................  [email]
    John Schiermeier ......................  [email]
    Robyn Reid ............................  [email]
    Laura Baker ...........................  [email]
    Theresa  ..............................  ????@sgi.com
    Leanne Sinibaldi ......................  [email]
With:
    Karen Wilkie
    Michael Richards
    Estelle Harris
    Jerry Seinfeld
    Jason Alexander
    Julia Louis-Drefus
    Larry David
    Tom Cherones
    John Cygan
    and many more!
============================================================================
Quotes and Scene summary:
============================================================================

% This story is true, most of the people are real. This is all taken from % my memory of the events, and since it has taken so long to type it in, % slight embellishments may have been made. But only for the sake of making % the story more interesting.

% Sixteen members of the Vandelay Industries mailing list arrives en masse % to CBS Studio City. The group emerge from their cars looking very % inconspicuous, wearing various forms of Brutewear. The pack gathers % for a quick photo opportunity.

Donna: (to a security guard) Could you take our picture? Guard: No, I'm TOO busy.

% Hmmm, when have you ever seen a security guard, TOO busy.

Barb (to a burly looking guy): Excuse me, would you take our picture? Burly Guy: Nope, I HAVE to leave now.

% We continue to beg and plead passers by to take a brief moment and % snap our picture.

Bob: Really, it will take no time at all. Just snap our picture ... ah, with those ten cameras over there.

% Off in the distance, a familiar face starts approaching the group.

Donna: Would you take our picture?

% He answers our pathetic plea, and agrees to help. Like an acrobat, % he juggles the ten cameras, snapping a perfect picture with each one.

% Suddenly, an anonymous member from the group tactfully asks:

Vandelaian: By the way, are you anybody? Acrobat: Well, I used to be. My name is John Cygan, I used to play Harlan Stone on Bob, but most of the show has been redone, and I'M OUT!

% Too bad. I really liked that show. It had a real catchy title, too. % Rich and I quickly ask John the acrobat, to pose with us for a picture.

% At this point, all of us decide to store our cameras away in the car. % Surely they won't allow us to take them on the set. (Hint slight % foreshadowing indicating that this was a very stupid move.)

% The time has come to hunt down the Seinfeld set. We head straight ahead, % and low and behold we see a huge sein, er sign ahead. The latest grey and % blue Seinfeld logo is painted on the stage door. As we continue toward the % stage door entrance, we see Karen Wilkie, a production assistant and our % contact with the show.

Karen: What are doing here already. You're an hour early. Donna: Well Karen, we were deathly afraid that the famous california traffic jams may cause us to miss out on the show.

% Not knowing what to do with us, Karen goes back to try and get us onto % the set during the rehearsal. % Meanwhile, a familiar face walks by the group on his way onto the set.

Man: So, do you guys recognize me? Bob: Hmmm. Man: I play Mr. Lippman, Elaine's boss at Pendant Publishing. Bob: Those Bastards.

% At this point, I'm really beginning to regret leaving the camera in the car. % I leave my belongings with Dave Silver and start heading back to the car. I % walk about 10 yards when I nearly run into some lanky fellow. This "hipster % dufus" looks toward me and immediately stares at my "brute" shirt. It's % as if he's looking in a mirror.

% Being ever so calm and collected Bob: Ahh..., oh, Michael Richards!

% He continues to look real strangely at me, as if to say "Well, duh!" % Okay Bob, collect your thoughts.

Bob: Our group is here to see the show tonight. Michael: Oh yeah. The computer group.

% He's aware of our existence, and shows me the peace symbol.

Bob: It's a real pleasure to meet you.

% Again he puts on that "Kramer" grin, and gives me the peace symbol.

% Karen comes back, and directs us into the studio. % I turn around and get back into the group. % Suddenly, I'm getting quite a bit of attention from the % others, since I actually "talked" to Michael.

Karen: You guys can sit and watch for awhile, but be very quiet.

% Hey, we've hunted wabbits, we know how to be berry berry quiet.

Karen: I'm just afraid you guys will be bored sitting there.

% Ah, yeah, WE will be bored.

% So, like mice we sneak onto the set and sit down. They are % actually filming a scene with Jerry and Wayne Knight % (Newman) in Jerry's car.

Newman: I use dental tape. Jerry: (can't hold it in and starts laughing)

% This sequence is repeated several times, and Jerry has trouble keeping % a straight face.

% There are some scenes that get filmed prior to the audience's arrival. % The car was placed directly in front of Jerry's apartment, I imagine % it would get in the way if they kept it there while trying to film the % rest of the show. After 10 or 15 minutes, we head back off the stage % to kill an hour.

% As we walk through the stage door, Wayne Knight rushes past me.

Bob (sneering): Hellllooo, Newman.

% Okay, well maybe I didn't say it, but I was thinking it.

% We are now outside of the studio, contemplating our next move. % Suddenly, the stage door opens and Estelle Harris starts walking % down the steps. The group proceeds to approach her.

Bob: Excuse me, Ms. Harris, I just wanted to tell you I think you do a wonderful job as Mrs. Estelle Costanza. Estelle: Why thank you. Boy, you even know my character's name.

% Hey, I wrote the episode guide.

Bob:     I especially enjoyed you in 'The Contest'.  That's my favorite
         episode.
Estelle: You mean the episode about masturbation?  Yes that was wonderful.
Bob:     Would you mind giving me your autograph?

% Thinking quickly, I pull out a bumper sticker "MASTER OF MY DOMAIN".

Estelle: (Laughing) I sure am!

% She writes that, and signs her name. I found her to be very funny in person.

% After this, we kill about an hour. Most importantly, I make it back to % the car, and retrieve my camera.

% At 6:30, we all reconvene by the stage. This is right next to some % dumpsters. Two guys comes out to unload garbage into the dumpsters % as we wait. Well, one of the guys had quite an attitude. % unloading the garbage of celebrities.

Man #1: Gee, it must be fascinating it to stand around and watch garbage. Bob: Hey buddy, we didn't come here to watch Home Improvement!

% Someone comes out with a list of names. They decide to let us all enter % as a group.

% We take our seats in front of Jerry's apartment. Across the aisle from % us are Diane Keaton and Brad Hall. In front of us is Michael's daughter % Sophie. The studio is much longer than the padded stadium style seating. % Many of the scenes are only visible from the monitors over head. % % Once everyone is seated, we are treated to short vignettes from last % season. An MC, Pat Hazell, comes out to warm up the audience.

% Pat introduces Michael, Jason, Julia and finally Jerry to the audience. % Jerry comes into the audience to do some of his standup bits. Most of % his material was also used in the first three episodes from Season #5. % episodes from Season 5. % % After his standup, Jerry fielded some questions from the audience.

Audience member #1: What's your favorite episode from last year?
Jerry:              Hmmm, I'd have to say 'The Outing'.
Audience member #2: What's your favorite cereal.
Jerry:              Cheerios.
Audience member #3: What do you think of the restaurant in LA that airs
                    your show to their patrons?
Jerry:              Are you from that restaurant?
Audience member #4: Yes, I'm the owner.  Someone from your staff sent us
                    tickets for tonight's show.
Jerry:              Well, while your here, we are bulldozing your restaurant.
Audience member #5: Are you going to go back on tour soon?
Jerry:              Yes, right around Thanksgiving.
Ken:                Oh great!  Any new material.

% Oops, Ken, I heard your comment, too. It was pretty funny.

% Everything gets set up for scene #1 in George's parent's kitchen. % They film each scene at least twice. In the event that someone % blows a line, they either reshoot the scene, or go back a couple % lines.

% In between filming scenes, Pat Hazell fields questions from the audience. % If he can't answer it, he passes it on to a staff member.

Pat: Are there any groups here tonight?

% Sixteen hands go up.

Bob: Yes! We're a group of fans that discuss the show over a computer network. Pat: Oh, a *Computer* group.

% Uh oh. I think we've been branded. Maybe he'll lay off us.

Rich: Why is another actor playing the part of George's father? Pat: Sometimes we can't get an actor or we decide to replace him with another. You don't have to worry, it's just a show.

% Hmmm, okay, he's being funny.

David: It looks like Jerry's computer has been upgraded, what kind is it?

% D'OH!

Pat: (Talking to someone on stage) Would someone find out what kind of computer that is, for the *Computer* group?

% So we continue to get a little ribbing for being computer nerds, NTTAWWT.

% At one point, Jason's wife makes an attempt to get back to her seat, % trying to avoid attention. Pat purposely blocks her every move and % introduces her to the audience.

% Okay, there ready to shoot, scene #1.

============================================================================
See the episode capsule for "The Sniffing Accountant", for more details.
============================================================================

% After the filming was completed, our group was able to stick around, % as Karen promised. The ushers made valiant attempts to get us to leave, % but we held tight.

% We got to see them reshoot several of the scenes over again. Julia % was not in one of the first scene's that they were reshooting, so % some of us approached her for her autograph. She was very accommodating % and very pleasant. We waited and watched some more, until Michael and % Jason were available.

Bob:    Hi Jason, good luck on your Emmy nomination.
Jason:  Why thank you very much.
Bob:    Would you mind signing my bumper sticker?

% I hand him the one that says "My boys can swim!" % He got a real kick out of it, and laughs. He writes: % Oh YEA!", and signs his name. % Gee, I hope I didn't put the kibosh on him by wishing him luck.

% I had a second chance to meet Michael Richards. This time I got % him to sign one of my shirts. He seemed to be intrigued by the % "In my mind ... I'm already gone" shirt, he hadn't seen it before.

% At some point, Estelle asked Karen if we could take pictures on the % stage. Karen got the approval, and before long we were raiding Jerry's % refrigerator and drooling on his couch.

Karen: Well, did you get to meet everyone, and get all the pictures you
       wanted?
Bob:   Yes, I think we've seen everyone but Jerry.  By the way, thanks so
       much for making everything possible.

% Within 5 minutes Jerry popped out. At this point, it was after % midnight, and I'm sure the crew was hoping they could wrap up % everything soon. Jerry was not in the mood to entertain us at % this point, but he accommodated us by signing autographs.

% All in all it was an exciting and fun trip. My only regret was that % I never got to speak with Larry David. I had a couple opportunities % when I was standing next to him, but I was afraid that he was too busy % to stop and chat.

Joel SchneierBob Warznak

I was intrigued by the bumperstickers("master of my domain," "my boys can swim") and the kramer t-shirt mentioned in this capsule. Does anyone know of anywhere (particularly in the Philadelphia area) that they are available?

Thanks,

Joel Schneier [email]