Mar 7, 2004, 4:03 AM ET·67 posts by 15 posters·alt.tv.seinfeld
🌀 Off topic😂 Loved it🔥 Controversial
Off-topic discussion about Mel Gibson's film "The Passion of the Christ" becomes derailed with religious debate and hostile personal attacks among posters.
I saw the movie the whole world has been buzzing about, and I must say, it be mucho violente.
Mel has been in two movies I can think of with a similar theme. One was Braveheart, the other was Payback. Each one featured the main character, Mel, enduring excruciating pain at the end. The difference, however, was that Jesus Christ wasn't greeted with a vision of his true love from the other side waiting for his arrival. In The Passion, it was the DEVIL and his punkass child the ANTICHRIST, moving undetected through the crowd as Jesus Almighty took a painful beating at the hands of the possessed and maniacal Roman soldiers. From now on, whenever I say, "In Jesus' name," or simply the word, "Jesus", I'll be able to picture of the unequivocal beating and suffering he endured for a wretch like me. The performance by the actors playing the Jewish religious leaders was excellent. When that one dude asks Jesus if he is the one they were after, he shows such an overwhelming amount of evil and iniquity in his eyes that you think, for a second, that you are there. Is the movie Anti-Semitic? I think it's impossible to portray a bunch of leaders aiming to put Jesus Christ to death without making them look hideously evil. At the end, when he reappears resurrected, with his perfect body, I noticed his eyelid drop slightly, and my take on that subtle yet unmistakable gesture was that it was his realization that he now had the POWER to judge the World, and that he WOULD some day. For all you nay-sayers, I only hope it's just that you've never been shown the Glory of Jesus Christ. And you know why.
On Sun, 07 Mar 2004 01:34:45 -0800, in alt.tv.sopranos, =?iso-8859-1?Q? =B1?= puts the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again. It does this whenever it's told -
I'm pretty sure that not many people would pay $10 to see a film about it.
And unto the reindeer he said, Take this magic dust, and flyeth thee up into the sky and pull my sleigh through the sky so that I may give presents to all the children of the world. Santa 3:16
Santa told us that reindeer could fly, and if you don't accept that, you will be punished by getting coal in your stocking every year for the rest of eternity.
You must have faith in Santa and believe in him even if you can't see or hear him, just know in your heart he is real and will give you presents if you truly believe in him.
He sees you when you are sleeping, and knows when you are awake, and when you are bad or good. - Chuck the Elf 4:32
You can choose to not follow the rules and orders that Santa has forced you to follow, but if you don't, you will end up with nothing but coal, while the rest of us will be rewarded with presents.
I should have known you wouldn't understand something that complex. Here, let me simplify it for you, just replace Santa with the Easter Bunny and then perhaps you will see it.
[ From: "G.Subramaniam" [ Subject: Cruelty and Violence in the Bible [ Date: Sat, 6 Mar 2004
Link to website
http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/
Cruelty and Violence in the Bible
Thou shalt break them with a rod of iron; thou shalt dash them in pieces.--Psalms 2:9
Genesis
God likes Abel's dead animals better than Cain's fruits and vegetables. Why? Well, no reason is given, but it probably has something to do with the amount of pain, blood, and gore involved. 4:3-5
Because God liked Abel's animal sacrifice more than Cain's vegetables, Cain kills his brother Abel in a fit of religious jealousy. 4:8
God is angry. He decides to destroy all humans, beasts, creeping things, fowls, and "all flesh wherein there is breath of life." He plans to drown them all. 6:7, 17
God repeats his intention to kill "every living substance .. from off the face of the earth." But why does God kill all the innocent animals? What had they done to deserve his wrath? It seems God never gets his fill of tormenting animals. 7:4
God drowns everything that breathes air. From newborn babies to koala bears --all creatures great and small, the Lord God drowned them all. 7:21-23
Noah kills the "clean beasts" and burns their dead bodies for God. According to 7:8 this would have caused the extinction of all "clean" animals since only two of each were taken onto the ark. "And the Lord smelled a sweet savor." 8:20
To free Lot from captivity, Abram sends an army of slaves to pursue and smite his captors. 14:14-15
God tells Abram to kill some animals for him. The needless slaughter makes God feel better. 15:9-10
Hagar conceives, making Sarai jealous. Abram tells Sarai to do to Hagar whatever she wants. "And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled." 16:6
Lot refuses to give up his angels to the perverted mob, offering his two "virgin daughters" instead. He tells the bunch of angel rapers to "do unto them [his daughters] as is good in your eyes." This is the same man that is called "just" and "righteous" in 2 Pet.2:7-8. 19:7-8
God kills everyone (men, women, children, infants, newborns) in Sodom and Gomorrah by raining "fire and brimstone from the Lord out of heaven." Well, almost everyone --he spares the "just and righteous" Lot and his family. 19:24
God threatens to kill Abimelech and his people for believing Abe's lie. 20:3-7
God orders Abraham to kill Isaac as a burnt offering. Abraham shows his love for God by his willingness to murder his son. But finally, just before Isaac's throat is slit, God provides a goat to kill instead. 22:2-13
Dinah, the daughter of Jacob, is "defiled" by a man who seems to love her dearly. Her brothers trick all of the men of the town and kill them (after first having them all circumcised), and then take their wives and children captive. 34:1-31
"The terror of God was upon the cities that were round about them." I don't know what the "terror of God" is, but I'll bet it isn't pleasant. 35:5
"And Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him." What did Er do to elicit God's wrath? The Bible doesn't say. Maybe he picked up some sticks on Saturday. 38:7
After God killed Er, Judah tells Onan to "go in unto they brother's wife." But "Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and ... when he went in unto his brother's wife .. he spilled it on the ground.... And the thing which he did displeased the Lord; wherefore he slew him also." This lovely Bible story is seldom read in Sunday School, but it is the basis of many Christian doctrines, including the condemnation of both masturbation and birth control. 38:8-10
After Judah pays Tamar for her services, he is told that she "played the harlot" and "is with child by whoredom." When Judah hears this, he says, "Bring her forth, and let her be burnt." 38:24
Joseph interprets the baker's dream. He says that the pharaoh will cut off the baker's head, and hang his headless body on a tree for the birds to eat. 40:19
Exodus
Moses murders an Egyptian after making sure that no one is looking. 2:11-12
God threatens to kill the Pharaoh's firstborn son. 4:23
God decides to kill Moses because his son had not yet been circumcised. 4:24-26
God will make sure that Pharaoh does not listen to Moses, so that he can kill Egyptians with his armies. 7:4
"And the Egyptians shall know that I am the LORD." Who else could be so cruel and unjust? 7:5, 17
God tells Moses and Aaron to smite the river and turn it into blood. 7:17-24
The fifth plague: all cattle in Egypt die. 9:2-6
The sixth plague: boils and blains upon man and beast. 9:9-12
"For I will at this time send all my plagues upon thine heart, and upon thy servants, and upon thy people; that thou mayest know that there is none like me in all the earth." Who else but the biblical god could be so cruel? 9:14
God kills all Egyptian cattle with hail. 9:19-20
The seventh plague is hail. "And the hail smote throughout the land of Egypt all that was in the field, both man and beast." 9:22-25
These verses clearly show that the mass murder of innocent children by God was premeditated. 11:4-6 (see 12:29-30)
God will kill the Egyptian children to show that he puts "a difference between the Egyptians and Israel." 11:7
God explains to Moses that he intends to "smite all the firstborn in the land of Egypt, both man and beast. 12:12
After God has sufficiently hardened the Pharaoh's heart, he kills all the firstborn Egyptian children. When he was finished "there was not a house where there was not one dead." Finally, he runs out of little babies to kill, so he slaughters the firstborn cattle, too. 12:29
To commemorate the divine massacre of the Egyptian children, Moses instructs the Israelites to "sacrifice to the Lord all that openeth the matrix" -- all the males, that is. God has no use for dead, burnt female bodies. 13:2, 12, 15
After hardening Pharaoh's heart a few more times, God drowns Pharaoh's army in the sea 14:4-28
Moses and the people sing praises to their murderous god. 15:1-19
"The Lord is a man of war." Indeed, judging from his acts in the Old Testament, he is a vicious warlike monster. 15:3
God's right hand dashes people in pieces. 15:6
Joshua, with God's approval, kills the Amalekites "with the edge of the sword." 17:13
"The Lord has sworn [God swears!] that the Lord will have war with Amalek from generation to generation." 17:14-16
Any person or animal that touches Mt. Sinai shall be stoned to death or "shot through." 19:12-13
God gives instructions for killing and burning animals. He says that if we will make such "burnt offerings," he will bless us for it. What kind of mind would be pleased by the killing and burning of innocent animals? 20:24
A child who hits or curses his parents must be executed. 21:15, 17
An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. 21:24-25
If an ox gores someone, then both the ox and its owner must die. 21:28-29
"Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Thousands of innocent women have suffered excruciating deaths because of this verse. 22:18
"Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death." Is it really necessary to kill such people? Couldn't we just send them to counseling or something? 22:19
"He who sacrificeth unto any god, save unto the Lord only, he shall be utterly destroyed." If this commandment is obeyed, then the four billion people who do not believe in the biblical god must be killed. 22:20
If you make God angry enough, he will kill you and your family with his own sword. 22:24
"The firstborn of thy sons thou shalt give unto me." (As a burnt offering?) 22:29
God promises to "send his fear before the Israelites" and to kill everyone that they encounter when they enter the promised land. 23:27
Moses has some animals killed and their dead bodies burned for God. Then he sprinkles their blood on the altar and on the people. This makes God happy. 24:5-8
Get some animals, kill them, chop up their bodies, wave body parts in the air, burn the carcasses, and sprinkle the blood all around -- in precisely the way God tells you. It may well make you sick, but it makes God feel good. 29:11-37
Have your killed and offered your bullock for a sin offering today? How about the two lambs you are supposed to offer each day? 29:36-39
Wash up or die. 30:20-21
Whoever puts holy oil on a stranger shall be "cut off from his people." 30:33
Those who break the Sabbath are to be executed. 31:14
God asks to be left alone so that his "wrath may wax hot" and he can "consume them. 32:10
God orders the sons of Levi (Moses, Aaron, and the other members of their tribe that were "on the Lord's side") to kill "every man his neighbor." "And there fell of the people that day about 3000 men." 32:27-28
But God wasn't satisfied with the slaughter of the 3000, so he killed some more people with a plague. 32:35
If you can't redeem him, then just "break his neck." Hey, it's all for the glory of God. 34:20
Whoever works, or even kindles a fire, on the Sabbath "shall be put to death." 35:2-3
Leviticus
God gives detailed instructions for performing ritualistic animal sacrifices. such bloody rituals must be important to God, judging from the number of times that he repeats their instructions. Indeed the entire first nine chapters of Leviticus can be summarized as follows: Get an animal, kill it, sprinkle the blood around, cut the dead animal into pieces, and burn it for a "sweet savor unto the Lord." Chapters 1 - 9
Wringing off the heads of pigeons for God. 5:8-9
The holy law of trespass offering: Find an animal; kill it; sprinkle the blood around; offer God the fat, rump, kidneys, and caul; burn and eat it in the holy place, for "it is most holy." 7:1-6
The priest must sprinkle the blood of the peace offerings. 7:14
Be careful what you eat during these animal sacrifices. Don't eat fat or blood -- these are for God. (And he doesn't like to share!) 7:18-27
God gives instructions for "wave offerings" and "heave offerings." He says these offerings are to be made perpetually "by a statute for ever." Have you made your heave offering today? 7:30-36
Moses does it all for God. First he kills an animal; wipes the blood on Aaron's ears, thumbs, and big toes. Then he sprinkles blood round about and waves the guts before the Lord. Finally he burns the whole mess for "a sweet savour before the Lord." 8:14-32
More killing, sprinkling of blood, waiving animal parts, and burning carcasses "before the Lord." 9:8-21
Two of the sons of Aaron "offered strange fire before the Lord" and "there went out fire from the Lord, and devoured them, and they died before the Lord." 10:1-2
If priests misbehave at the tabernacle by uncovering their heads, tearing their clothes, leaving with holy oil on them, or by drinking "wine or strong drink", then God will kill them and send his wrath on "all the people." 10:6-9
God's treatment for leprosy: Get two birds. Kill one. Dip the live bird in the blood of the dead one. Sprinkle the blood on the leper seven times, and then let the blood- soaked bird fly off. Next find a lamb and kill it. Wipe some of its blood on the patient's right ear, thumb, and big toe. Sprinkle seven times with oil and wipe some of the oil on his right ear, thumb and big toe. Repeat. Finally kill a couple doves and offer one for a sin offering and the other for a burnt offering. 14:2-32
God explains the use of scapegoats. It goes like this: Get two goats. Kill one. Wipe, smear, and sprinkle the blood around seven times. Then take the other goat, give it the sins of all the people, and send it off into the wilderness. 16:6-28
If you upset God, he'll cause the land to vomit you out. 18:25
"Whosoever shall commit any of these abominations ... shall be cut off from among their people." I'm not sure what being "cut off" means exactly, but I bet it isn't any fun. 18:29, 19:8
Kill anyone who "gives his seed" to Molech. If you refuse, God will cut you and your family off. 20:2-5
"For every one that curseth his father or his mother shall surely be put to death." Couldn't we try spanking first? 20:9
Both parties in adultery shall be executed. 20:10
"And the man that lieth with his father's wife ... both of them shall be put to death." Which? The man and his father? The father and his wife? Or the man and his father's wife? Oh heck, just kill all three. 20:11
If a man "lies" with his daughter-in-law, then both must be killed. 20:12
Homosexuals must be executed. 20:13
If you "lie" with your wife and your mother-in-law (now that sounds fun!), then all three of you must be burned to death. 20:14
If a man or woman "lie with a beast" both the person and the poor animal are to be killed. 20:15-16
People with "familiar spirits" (witches, fortune tellers, etc.) are to be stoned to death. 20:27
A priest's daughter who "plays the whore" is to be burned to death. 21:9
God gives us more instructions on killing and burning animals. I guess the first nine chapters of Leviticus wasn't enough. He says we must do this because he really likes the smell --it is "a sweet savour unto the Lord." 23:12-14, 18
Don't do any work on the day of atonement or God will destroy you. 23:29-30
A man curses and blasphemes while disputing with another man. Moses asks God what to do about it. God says that the whole community must stone him to death. "And the children of Israel did as the Lord and Moses commanded." 24:10-23
Anyone who blasphemes or curses shall be stoned to death by the entire community. 24:16
God tells the Israelites to "chase" their enemies and make them "fall before you by the sword." He figures five of the Israelites will be able to "chase" a hundred of their enemies, and a hundred will be able to "put ten thousand to flight." 26:7-8
God describes torments that he has planned for those who displease him. The usual stuff: plagues, burning fevers that will consume the eyes, etc. but he reserves the worst for the little children. He says "ye shall sow your seed in vain, for your enemies shall eat it", "I will send wild beasts among you, which shall rob you of your children", and "ye shall eat the flesh of your sons .. daughters." 26:16-39
All "devoted" things (both man and beast) "shall surely be put to death." 27:28-29
Numbers
God displays his hospitality with the admonition: "The stranger that cometh nigh shall be put to death." 1:51
Two of Aaron's sons are killed by God for "offering strange fire before the Lord." 3:4
God repeats his order (see 1:51) to kill any strangers who happen to come near. 3:10
Once again (see 1:51 and 3:10) God tells his favorite people to kill any strangers that come near. 3:38
Don't touch or "go in to see when the holy things are covered." God kills people who touch or look at uncovered holy things. 4:15, 4:20
"And when the people complained, it displeased the Lord: and the Lord heard it." (He had his hearing aid on.) He then burns the complainers alive. That'll teach them. 11:1
"And wile the flesh [of the quails] was yet between their teeth, ere it was chewed, the wrath of the Lord was kindled against the people, and the Lord smote the people with a very great plague. "The Bible isn't too clear about what these poor folks did to upset God so much; all it says is that they had "lusted." 11:33
More plagues and pestilence sent by God. God repeats one of his favorite promises: "your carcasses shall fall in this wilderness." 14:12, 29, 14:32-37
God gives more instructions for the ritualistic killing of animals. The smell of burning flesh is "a sweet savour unto the Lord." 15:3, 13-14, 24
The Israelites find a man picking up sticks on the sabbath. God commands them to kill him by throwing rocks at him. 15:32-36
Because of a dispute between Korah and Moses, God makes the ground open up and it swallows Korah and his family. And then, just for the hell of it, God has a fire burn 250 men (friends of Korah?) to death. 16:20-49
After God killed Korah, his family, and 250 innocent bystanders, the people complained saying, "ye have killed the people of the Lord." So God, who doesn't take kindly to criticism, sends a plague on the people. And "they that died in the plague were 14,700." 16:41-50
God threatens to kill those who murmur. To which the people reply, "Behold, we die, we perish, we all perish ... Shall we be consumed with dying?" 17:12-13
According to this verse, it is wise to stay away from holy things and places -- like churches. God will kill you if you get too close. 18:3
God shows us how to make new friends by saying : "The stranger that cometh nigh shall be put to death." 18:7
God describes once again the procedure for ritualistic animal sacrifices. such rituals must be extremely important to God, since he makes their performance a "statute" and "covenant" forever. Why, then don't Bible- believers perform these sacrifices anymore? Don't they realize how God must miss the "sweet savour" of burning flesh? Don't they believe God when he says "forever"? 18:17-19
Don't get near holy things or "pollute" them. If you do, God will kill you. 18:22, 32
The purification of the unclean. These absurd rituals, cruel sacrifices, and unjust punishments are vitally important to God. He even insists that they are to be "a perpetual statute" to all humankind. 19:1-22
"And the Lord hearkened to the voice of Israel, and delivered up the Canaanites; and they utterly destroyed them and their cities." This verse demonstrates the power of prayer: If you ask God, he will destroy entire cities for you. 21:3
God sends "fiery serpents" to bite his chosen people, and many of them die. 21:6
God delivers the Amorites into Moses' hands. (You're in God hands with Moses.) So Moses does the usual thing, killing everyone "until their was none left alive." 21:34-35
God's people will kill like a lion and then "drink the blood of the slain." 23:24
God, who is as strong as a unicorn, will eat up the nations, break their bones, and then pierce them through with his arrows. What a guy! 24:8
After the people "commit whoredom with the daughters of Moab," Moses has them all killed. Then God tells Moses to hang their dead bodies up in front of him; God says that this will satisfy him. 25:1-5
When one of the Israelite men brings home a foreign woman, "Phinehas (Aaron's grandson) sees them and throws a spear "through the man .. and the woman through her belly." This act pleases God so much that "the plague was stayed from the children of Israel." But not before 24,000 had died. 25:6-9
God tells Moses how to care for his neighbors by saying: "Vex the Midianites, and smite them." 25:16-17
The ground swallow Korah and his companions and a fire consumes 250 men. 26:10
"And Nadab and Abihu died when they offered strange fire before the Lord." When you go camping avoid making any unusual fires. 26:61
In these chapters, God provides ridiculously detailed instructions for the ritualistic sacrifice of animals. The burning of their dead bodies smells great to God. Eleven times in these two chapters God says that they are to him a "sweet savour."
Under God's direction, Moses' army defeats the Midianites. They kill all the adult males, but take the women and children captive. When Moses learns that they left some live, he angrily says: "Have you saved all the women alive? Kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women children, that have not known a man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves." So they went back and did as Moses (and presumably God) instructed, killing everyone except for the virgins. In this way they got 32,000 virgins -- Wow! [Even God gets some of the booty -- including the virgins. (31:28-29)] 31:1-54 28-29
God killed all the Egyptian firstborn. 33:4
"The revenger of blood" must murder the murderer just as soon as he sees him. 35:19, 21
When a murder is committed the blood pollutes the land. The only way to cleanse it is to spill more blood by killing the killer. 35:33
Deuteronomy
"The Lord destroyed them before them" -- the general treatment of the people who were supposedly displaced by the Israelites. 2:21-22
God hardened the heart of the king of Heshbon and so that he could have him and all of his people killed. 2:30
At God's instructions, the Israelites "utterly destroyed the men, women, and the little ones" leaving "none to remain." 2:33-36
Again the Israelites kill everyone: "men, women, and children, of every city." 3:3,6
When going to war, don't be afraid. God is on your side; "he shall fight for you." 3:22
God destoyed the followers of Baalpeor. 4:3
If you worship the wrong god, God will get jealous and kill you. 6:15
God instructs the Israelites to kill, without mercy, all the inhabitants (strangers) of the land that they conquer. 7:2
If you do show any mercy to such strangers, "give your daughters to any of them, or "take" any of their daughters, then you'll get God so angry that he'll "destroy thee suddenly." 7:4
God will kill those who hate him. 7:10
God commands his people to "consume all the people which the Lord thy God shall deliver thee; thine eye shall have no pity on them." 7:16
God will send hornets to kill your enemies, "for the Lord thy God is among you, a mighty God and terrible." 7:20-23
God is "a consuming fire" that destroys people. 9:3
"The blood of sacrifices shall be poured out ... and thou shalt eat the flesh." Isn't this the sort of thing that satanists are accused of doing? 12:27
Prophets and dreamers are to be executed if they say or dream the wrong things. 13:1-5
If your brother, son, daughter, wife, or friend tries to get you to worship another god, "thou shalt surely kill him, thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death." If Bible-believers followed this one, they would have to kill many of their own family and friends. 13:6- 10
If you hear of a city where another god is worshiped, then destroy everyone in the city (even the cattle) and burn it down. (Watch out Salt Lake!) 13:12-16
Kill everyone who has religious beliefs that are different from your own. 17:2-7
Anyone who will not listen to a priest or a judge must be executed. 17:12-13
False prophets are to be (you guessed it) executed. How do you know who is a false prophet? By whether or not their predictions come true. (Watch out Jehovah's Witnesses!) 18:20
Murderers and perjurers are to be executed -- "and thine eye shall not pity" them. 19:11-13, 18-21
God travels with people and fights in their wars. 20:4
In the cities that god "delivers into thine hands" you must kill all the males (including old men, boys, and babies) with "the edge of the sword .... But the women .. shalt thou take unto yourself." 20:13
"But of the cities ... which the Lord thy God doth give thee for an inheritance, thou shalt save alive nothing that breatheth." Kill the old men and women, the sick and the dying, the blind and the lame, pregnant mothers, nursing mothers, infants, toddlers, and babies. 20:16
If you find a dead body and don't know the cause of death, then get all the elders together, cut off the head of a heifer, wash your hands over its body, and say our hands have not shed this blood. (That'll do it!) 21:1-8
If you have a "stubborn and rebellious son," then you and the other men in your neighborhood "shall stone him with stones that he die." 21:18-21
Hang on trees the bodies of those who are "accursed of God." They make nice decorations. 21:22
If a man marries, then decides that he hates his wife, he can claim she wasn't a virgin when they were married. If her father can't produce the "tokens of her virginity" (bloody sheets), then the woman is to be stoned to death at her father's doorstep. 22:13-21
"If a man be found lying with a woman married to a husband, then they shall both of them die." 22:22
If a betrothed virgin is raped in the city and doesn't cry out loud enough, then "the men of the city shall stone her to death." 22:23-24
If two men fight and the wife of one grabs the "secrets" of the other, "then thou shalt cut off her hand" and "thy eye shall not pity her." 25:11-12
God commands the Israelites to "blot out the rembrance of Amalek from under heaven." A few hundred years later God orders Saul to kill of the Amalekites "both man and woman, infant and suckling." (1 Sam.15:2-3) 25:19
"Cursed shall be the fruit of thy body." 28:18
If you misbehave, god will send you "cursing, vexing, the pestilence, consumption, fever, inflammation, extreme burning, the sword, blasting, and mildew." 28:20-22
"And thy carcass shall be meat to all the fowls of the air." 28:25-26
"The Lord will smite thee with the botch of Egypt, and the emerods [hemorrhoids], and with the scab, and with the itch, whereof thou canst be healed. The Lord will smite thee with madness, and blindness, and astonishment of heart." 28:27-28
"Thine ox shall be slain before thine eyes." 28:31
Thy sons and thy daughters shall be given unto another people." 28:32
You will be enslaved and driven mad in another country. 28:33-34
"The Lord will smite thee in the knees, and in the legs, with a sore botch that cannot be healed, from the sole of thy foot unto the top of thy head." 28:35
You will be ruled by other nations, forced to serve other gods, become a laughingstock among your neighbors, have your crops destroyed by locusts, your vines eaten by worms, and have fruitless olive trees. 28:36-40
"Thou shalt begat sons and daughters, but thou shall not enjoy them; for they shall go into captivity." 28:41
"All these curses shall come upon thee ... and upon thy seed for ever." 28:48-49
God will enslave you and destoy you with hunger, thirst, hardship, and all kinds of deprivation. 28:48-52
"And thou shalt eat the fruit of thine own body, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters." 28:53-55
"The tender and delicate woman" will be forced to eat her own children "that cometh out from between her feet." 28:56-57
If you don't do as God says he'll send plagues to torment and destroy you. 28:58-67
God will have you sold to your enemies -- but even they won't buy you. 28:68
God, in his jealousy, "will not spare him and will smite him with "all the curses that are in this book." 29:20
"And the Lord will put all these curses upon thine enemies." See Dt.28:16-64 for some of the curses God has in mind. 30:7
When God gets mad -- watch out! He'll starve you to death, burn you with fire, and send vicious beasts to devour you. He'll "destroy both the young man and the virgin, the suckling also with the man of gray hairs." Not even the helpless and innocent are spared by this psychotic God. 32:21-26
God says, "To me belongeth vengeance, and recompense ... for the day of their destruction is at hand." God's attitude seems to be: "Go ahead, make my day." 32:35
God says, "I kill ... I wound ... I will make my arrows drunk with blood, and my sword shall devour flesh." Someone should take his sword and arrows away, at least until he's feeling better. 32:39-43
Joshua
"And the city shall be accursed ... and all that therein, to the Lord: only Rahab the harlot shall live." God explains that Rahab is to be spared since she hid Joshua's spies and lied to those who were searching for them (2:4-5). But why was everyone else killed? Some of them were probably liars too. 6:17
"And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass, with the edge of the sword." 6:21
After killing everyone, "they burnt the city with fire, and all that was therein." Only the valuables (silver, gold, brass, and iron) did they keep to "put into the treasury of the house of the Lord." 6:24
Joshua says that those who try to rebuild Jericho will be accursed by God, and will have to sacrifice both their oldest and their youngest sons in its construction. Well, Jericho still exists today, and is often considered to be the world's oldest, continuously occupied city. 6:26
If you happen to see "the accursed thing," don't touch it. If you do, you, your family, and all of your animals must be burned. 7:15
"And Joshua ... took Achan ... and his sons, and his daughters, and his oxen, and his sheep... And all of Israel stoned them with stones, and burned them with fire, after they had stoned them with stones." This is because Achan "took of the accursed thing" -- whatever that means. But why would God require that Achan's sons and daughters (and even his animals) be stoned to death along with him? The Bible doesn't say. But it does tell us that "the Lord turned from the fierceness of his anger" when Achan, his children, and his animals were stoned to death and their dead bodies burned. This story tells us about the loving kindness of the biblical God. 7:24-16
"When ye have taken the city [Ai] ... ye shall set the city on fire: according to the commandment of the LORD. 8:8
Joshua and his army, per God's instructions, slaughter "all the inhabitants of Ai." 8:22-26
Joshua hangs the king of Ai on a tree until evening. 8:29
After Joshua kills all the inhabitants of Ai, burns their city, and hangs their king on a tree, he kills some animals and burns them as a "peace offering" to his warlike God. 8:31
God curses the Gibeonites to be slaves of the Jews forever. 9:21-27
God slaughters the Amorites and even chases them "along the way" as they try to escape. Then he sends down huge hailstones and kills even more of them. 10:10-11
In a divine type of daylight savings time, God makes the sun stand still so that Joshua can get all his killing done before dark. 10:12-13
God tells Joshua to "pursue after your enemies and smite the hindmost of them." (Kick their butts.) Don't let any of them escape "for the Lord your God hath delivered them into your hand." 10:19
Joshua tells his captains to "put your feet upon the necks of these kings." He says, "thus shall the Lord do to all of your enemies." Then Joshua kills the kings and hangs them on trees. 10:24-26
Joshua, at God's command, kills everyone and everything that he can find (including babies and little children)-- or, as the Bible puts it, he "utterly destroyed all that breathed, as the Lord commanded." 10:28-32
God delivers the Hazorites into Joshua's hand, and he knows just what to do with them: he smites them all with (you guessed it) the edge of the sword until "there was not any left to breathe." 11:6-17
"And Joshua did unto them as the LORD bade him: he houghed their horses." 11:9
"For it was of the Lord to harden their hearts, that they should come against Israel in battle, that he might destroy them utterly." Notice that God hardens their hearts so that he can have an excuse to kill them. 11:20
"Did not Achan son of Zerah commit a trespass in the accursed thing, and wrath fell on all the congregation of Israel?" To find out see Joshua 7:1-26. 22:20
God is jealous and will never forgive you for your sins. "He will turn and do you hurt, and consume you." 24:19-20
Judges
God appoints Judah to succeed Joshua. The Lord delivers his foes into his hands and another 10,000 are slain. In the process, they capture Adonibezek and "cut off his thumbs and great toes." Nice guys. 1:2-7
"They slew the Canaanites that inhabited Zephath, and utterly destroyed it ... And the Lord was with Judah." (You can tell by the number of innocent people he killed.) 1:17, 19
Ehud delivers a "message from God" to the king of Moab. God's message consists of a knife thrust so deeply into the king's belly that it could not be extracted, "and the dirt came out." Just another lovely Bible story. 3:15-22
God "delivers" more folks into the hands of his chosen people. "And they slew of Moab ... about 10,000 men ... and their escaped not a man." 3:28-29
Shamgar kills 600 Philistines with an ox goad. Praise God. 3:31
"The Lord discomfited Sisera ... with the edge of the sword ... and there was not a man left." 4:15-16
Jael (our heroine) offers food and shelter to a traveler (Sisera, Jabin's captain), saying "turn in my Lord ... fear not." Then after giving him a glass of milk and tucking him in, she drives a tent stake through his head. "So God subdued on that day Jabin by Jael." 4:17-23
For murdering her guest while he slept, Jael is "blessed above women." (Hail Jael, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women....?) 5:24-26
"So let all thine enemies perish, O Lord." (Let them all have their temples pierced by blessed women.) 5:31
When Gideon and his water-lapping companions blow their trumpets, God forces all the enemy soldiers to kill each other. 7:22
Two princes are killed and their heads are brought to Gideon. 7:25
For refusing to feed him and his army, Gideon tears the flesh off the elders of Succoth and kills the men of the city. 8:7, 16
Gideon orders his son to kill two kings, but he refuses. So Gideon has to do it himself since his son isn't "man" enough to do it. 8:20
Abimelech kills 70 brothers "upon one stone." (He was trying to get in the Guinness Book of World Records.) 9:5
God sends evil spirits that cause humans to deal treacherously with each other. 9:23-24
God smites Sihon and all his people and gives their land to Israel. 11:21
"Whomsoever the LORD our God shall drive out from before us, them will we [the Israelites] possess." 11:24
When "the spirit of the Lord" comes upon Jephthah, he makes a deal with God: If God will help him kill the Ammonites, then he (Jephthah) will offer to God as a burnt offering whatever comes out of his house to greet him. God keeps his end of the deal by providing Jephthah with "a very great slaughter." But when Jephthah returns, his nameless daughter comes out to greet him (who'd he expect, his wife?). Well, a deal's a deal, so he delivers her to God as a burnt offering -- after letting her spend a couple of months going up and down on the mountains bewailing her virginity. 11:29-39
42,000 men are killed because someone mispronounces "shibboleth." 12:6
Samson rips up a young lion when "the spirit of the Lord came mightily upon him." Later, when going to "take" his Philistine wife he notices a swarm of bees and honey in the lion's carcass (a Divine miracle -- or just rotting flesh and maggots?). 14:5-8
"And the spirit of the Lord came upon him [Samson], and he ... slew thirty men." (Samson might have been a decent person if he could have kept the spirit of the Lord off him.) 14:19
Samson catches 300 foxes, ties their tails together, and sets them on fire; the Philistines burn Samson's ex-wife and father-in-law; and Samson smites them "hip and thigh with a great slaughter." 15:4-8
"The spirit of the Lord came mightily upon" Samson and "he found a new jawbone of an ass ... and took it, and slew 1000 men therewith." 15:14-15
Samson, with God's help, kills himself and 3000 Philistine men and women by causing a roof to collapse. 16:28-30
After taking in a traveling Levite, the host offers his virgin daughter and his guest's concubine to a mob of perverts (who want to have sex with his guest). The mob refuses the daughter, but accepts the concubine and they "abuse her all night." The next morning she crawls back to the doorstep and dies. The Levite puts her dead body on an ass and takes her home. Then he chops her body up into twelve pieces and sends them to each of the twelve tribes of Israel 19:22-30
God tells the Israelites to send the tribe of Judah into battle and 22,000 men were killed by the Benjamites. 20:18, 21
God tells them to go to battle again and another 18,000 are killed. 20:23, 25
Finally, God enters the fray and kills 25,100 Benjamites. 20:35, 37
To find wives for the Benjamites (they were unwilling to use their own daughters), the other tribes attacked and killed all occupants of a city except for the young virgins. These virgins were then given to the Benjamites for wives. 21:7-23
1 Samuel
"The Lord killeth ..." -- every chance he gets. 2:6, 2:25
"The adversaries of the Lord shall be broken to pieces; out of heaven shall he thunder upon them." If God doesn't like you, he'll send a thunderstorm your way to break your body into little pieces. 2:10
If you're not careful God will cut off your arm, consume your eyes, grieve your heart, and kill your sons and grandfathers. 2:31-34
God smites the people of Ashdod with hemorrhoids "in their secret parts." 5:6, 9, 12
for there was a deadly destruction throughout all the city; the hand of God was very heavy there. 5:11
God kills 50,070 men for looking into the ark. "And the people lamented, because the Lord had smitten many of the people with a great slaughter." 6:19
"I make a covenant with your, that I may thrust out all your right eyes." Deals like this can only be found in the Bible. 11:2
"And the spirit of God came upon Saul ... and he took a yoke of oxen, and hewed them in pieces, and sent them throughout all the coast of Israel [just as the Levite did to his concubine in Jg.19:22-30]". People do the darnedest things when the spirit of God comes upon them! 11:6-7
"Saul ... slew the Ammorites unto the heat of the day." Then he probably took a little break. After all, killing is hard work. 11:11
God delivers the Philistines into Johathan's hand. And his very "first slaughter ... was about twenty men." Not bad for a first slaughter. 14:12
Under God's influence, the Philistines killed each other. 14:20
But later, Saul and his army kill all of those who had not already been killed. 14:36
God orders Saul to kill all of the Amalekites: men, women, infants, sucklings, ox, sheep, camels, and asses. Why? Because God remembers what Amalek did hundreds of years ago. What did this have to do with the present situation? Nothing. God just wanted to some more innocent people killed. 15:2-3
Saul killed everyone but Agag (the king) and the best of the animals. But still God was furious with Saul for not killing everything as he had been told to do. He said, "it repenteth me that I have se Saul up to be king." 15:7-26
To please God, Samuel hacks Agag in pieces "before the Lord" [I bet God enjoyed that!] --after Agag pleads with him saying, "surely the bitterness of death has past." 15:32-34
David kills Goliath with his sling, beheads him, and carries the head back to Jerusalem. 17:51, 54
David and Saul have a contest to see who can kill the most people for God, and the women act as cheerleaders saying, "Saul has killed his thousands, and David his tens of thousands." 18:6-7
David kills 200 Philistines and brings their foreskins to Saul to buy his first wife (Saul's daughter Michal). Saul had only asked for 100 foreskins, but David was feeling generous. 18:25-27
"David went out, and fought with the Philistines, and slew them with a great slaughter." 19:8
Saul kills 85 priests of Nob and all men, women, children, and animals in the city of Nob. 22:18-19
"David inquires of the Lord, saying, Shall I go and smite these Philistines? And the Lord said unto David, Go, and smite the Philistines ... So David smote them with a great slaughter." 23:2-4
David vows to kill "any that pisseth against the wall." 25:22, 34
"And it came to pass about ten days after, that the Lord smote Nabal, that he died." This was convenient for David who then stole his property and his wife, Abigail. 25:38
"And David smote the land and left neither man nor woman alive." (No wonder God liked David so much!) 27:8-11
Saul visits a woman with a "familiar spirit" and she brings Samuel back from the dead. Samuel once again explains that God is angry at Saul for not killing all of the Amelekites. He says God is going to deliver all of Israel into the hands of the Philistines. (Since Saul refused to slaughter innocent people, God will slaughter the Israelites. Fair is fair.) 28:8-19
David spends the day killing more of those pesky Amalekites. They are completely wiped out again. (See 1 Sam.15:7-8, 20 and 27:8-9 for the last two times that they were exterminated.) 30:17
2 Samuel
David tells one of his "young men" to kill the Amalekite messenger who claimed to have mercifully killed Saul at Saul's own request. 1:15
Joab and Abner watch as the young men "play" a cruel game. "And they caught every one his fellow by the head, and thrust his sword in his fellow side, so they fell down together." 2:14
When Joab (David's captain) kills Abner (by smiting him under the fifth rib of course), David says that he and his kingdom are not responsible. The blame, he says, lays with Joab. So David curses Joab, his family, and their descendants forever. Let them all be plagued with venereal diseases and leprosy, starve to death, commit suicide, or lean on staves. (The Revised Standard Version translates "leaneth on a staff" as "holds a spindle," apparently meaning effeminate -- real men don't spin or weave.) 3:27-29
Some of David's men kill Saul's son (by smiting him under the fifth rib, of course) and bring his head to David, thinking that he'll be pleased. But he wasn't. David has the assassins killed, their hands and feet chopped off, and their bodies hung up (for decorations?) over the pool in Hebron. 4:6-7
Whoever kills the lame and the blind will be David's "chief and captain." 5:8
David asks God if he should kill some more Philistines. God says yes, and he'll even help. So David and God "smote the Philistines" again. 5:19, 25
Uzzah tries to keep the ark from falling off the cart, and God kills him for it. I guess it was God's way of saying Thanks. God is so taken with this story that he records it twice in the Bible: here and in 1 Chr.13:9-10. But in the 1 Samuel story, God kills Uzzah at "Nachon's threshingfloor", while in 1 Chronicles it happens near the "threshingfloor of Chidon." 6:6-7
David kills two thirds of the Moabites and makes the rest slaves. He also cripples the captured horses. 8:2-4
David kills and tortures thousands of people, "and the Lord preserved David withersoever he went." 8:6, 14
David tells Joab (his captain) to send Bathseba's husband (Uriah) to "the forefront of the hottest battle ... that he may be smitten and die." In this way, David gets another wife. 11:15, 11:17, 11:27
To punish David for having Uriah killed, God kills Bathsheba's baby boy. 12:14-18
David saws, hacks, and burns to death all the inhabitants of several cities. Maybe this is what is meant by "the tender mercies of David" (Acts 13:34). 12:31
Absalom has his servants kill his brother for raping his sister. (This chapter, which includes incest, rape, murder, should be rated NC-17.) 13:28-29
Poor Absalom gets his head caught in an oak tree, and before he can get free, Joab thrusts three darts through his heart. 18:14
Amasa is viciously slaughtered by Joab, who "shed out his bowels to the ground ... And Amasa wallowed in blood in the midst of the highway." 20:10, 12
"And they cut off the head of Sheba ... and cast it out to Joab." 20:21-22
To appease God and end the famine that was caused by his predecessor (Saul), David agrees to have seven of Saul's sons killed and hung up "unto the Lord." 21:6-9
A famine is sent on David's kingdom for three years. When David asks God why, God answers: "It is for Saul, and his bloody house, because he slew the Gibeonites. " So God sent a famine to punish a kingdom for something that a former king had done. 21:1
"He teacheth my hands to war." Might as well learn from an expert. 22:35
"Thou hast also given me the necks of mine enemies." 22:41
God offers David a choice of punishments for having conducted the census: 1) seven years of famine ( 1 Chr.21:1 says three years), 2) three months fleeing from enemies, or 3) three days of pestilence. David can't decide, so God chooses for him and sends a pestilence, killing 70,000 men (and probably around 200,000 women and children). 24:13
1 Kings
In David's last words, he commands his son Solomon to murder Joab. 2:5-9
Solomon has his brother (Adonijah) murdered. 2:24-25
Solomon carries out the deathbed instructions of his father David by having Joab murdered. 2:29-34
Solomon justifies the murder of Joab by saying that Joab also was a murderer, and that the blood of Joab's victims "shall therefore return upon the head of Joab, and upon the head of his seed for ever." 2:33
But Solomon is not done murdering yet. He has Shimei murdered --or as Solomon put it, "The Lord shall return thy wickedness upon thine own head." 2:44, 46
When the ark of the covenant was brought into the temple, Solomon killed more animals than could be numbered. 8:5
When dedicating the temple, Solomon kills 22,000 oxen and 120,000 sheep. All this blood and gore must have made God very happy. 8:63
Joab (David's captain) spent six months killing every male in Edom. 11:16
King Josiah is prophesied to sacrifice the priests of the "high places" on their altars. And he does so in 2 Kg.23:20. Note that this is a guy who "did what was right in the eyes of the Lord" (2 Kg.22:2). 13:2
God withers the hand of king Jeroboam. 13:4
God promises to "bring evil upon the house of Jerobaom" and says he will "cut off" anyone "that pisseth against the wall." God further explains that after he kills them, their dead bodies will be eaten by dogs (if they are city dwellers) or fowls (if they are country folk). 14:10-12
Baasha kills "all of the house of Jeroboam" leaving none "to breath." This slaughter was done "according to the word of the Lord." 15:29
God says that "him that dieth of Baasha in the city shall the dogs eat; and him that dieth of his in the fields shall the fowls of the air eat." 16:4
Zimri kills everyone "that pisseth against a wall ... according to the word of the Lord." 16:11-12
When Hiel rebuilds Jericho, he lays the foundation with the body of his oldest son and sets up the gates with his youngest son's body "according to the word of the Lord." 16:34
Elijah orders the people to kill all prophets of Baal. 18:40
God delivers the Syrians into the Israelites hands, and 100,000 were killed in one day. Of those that escaped, 27,000 were crushed by a falling wall. (Hey it can happen.) 20:28-30
God sends a lion to devour a man for refusing to strike another man. 20:35
The prophet tells king Ahab that he, and his people, shall be punished for releasing Ben-ha'dad: "Your life shall go for his life, and your people for his people." 20:42
Naboth is stoned to death for blaspheming god and the king. 21:13
"Thus saith the Lord, in the place where dogs licked the blood of Naboth shall dogs lick thy blood, even thine." 21:19
God says again that those that die in the city will be eaten by dogs, while those dying in the country will be eaten by fowls. 21:24
Jehoshaphat "did that which was right in the eyes of the Lord" and "took" the homosexuals (sodomites) "out of the land," or as the RSV says, "he exterminated" them. 22:43, 46
2 Kings
Ahaziah was sick and sent messengers to Baalzebub to ask if he would recover. God was jealous of the attention given to his competitor and tells Ahaziah that he will die for asking the wrong god. 1:4, 17
Elijah shows that he is "a man of God" by burning 102 men to death. 1:10, 12
God sends two bears to rip up 42 little children for making fun of Elisha's bald head. 2:23-24
God instructs the the Israelites, through the prophet Elisha, to implement a scorched earth policy on the Moabites. "Strike every fortified city and every choice city, and fell every good tree and stop all springs of water, and mar every good piece of land with stones." 3:19-25
In a desperate attempt to halt the slaughter of his people by the Israelites, the king of Moab sacrifices his oldest son as a burnt offering. 3:27
Elisha not only can cure leprosy, he can also dish it out. Here he makes his servant (Gehazi) and all his descendants lepers forever. 5:27
Elisha prays that God will make his adversaries blind, and God smites "them with blindness according the word of Elisha." 6:18
"So we boiled my son, and did eat him." 6:28-29
God sends a famine on the people that lasts for seven years. 8:1
God plans to have dogs eat Jezebel's body. 9:10
Jehu shoots an arrow right through poor old Jehoram's heart. 9:24
God has Jezebel thrown off a wall. Her blood is sprinkled on the wall and on the horses, by which she is trampled. Her body is eaten by dogs and all that remains of it is her hands, feet, and skull. God says that she "shall be as dung upon the face of the field." 9:33-37
All seventy of king Ahab's sons are killed, their heads put in baskets, and sent to Jezreel. He says, "Lay ye them in two heaps ..." 10:7-8
Jehu kills all that remained of king Ahab's family. 10:11
Jehu shows off his zeal for the Lord by murdering "all that remained unto Ahab in Samaria, till he had destroyed him according to the word of the Lord." 10:16-17
Jehu lied to the followers of Baal so that he could trap and kill them. 10:19
Jehu warns his guards saying, "If any of the men escape, he that letteth him go, his life shall be for the life of him." 10:24
Jehu, when he finishes his animal sacrifices, orders his men to "Go in, and slay them, let none come forth. And they smote them with the edge of the sword." 10:25
Jehu captures and then murders 42 men. 10:42
When Athaliah "saw that her son was dead, she arose and destroyed all of the seed royal." 11:1
The priest has Athaliah and her followers killed. 11:15- 16
Amaziah "did that which was right in the sight of the Lord" and killed ten thousand Edomites. 14:3, 7
God strikes king Azariah with leprosy "unto the day of his death" for not removing the high places. 15:5
King Menahem rips up all the pregnant women in Tizzah "because they opened not to him." Does God approve of such acts? It's impossible to tell from this passage; the mass murder is simply reported without editorial comment. 15:16
God sent lions to devour the foreigners in Samaria because "they feared not the Lord," and even worse "they knew not the manner of the God of the land." Well that'll teach them about God's manners. 17:25-26
An "angel of the Lord" kills 185,000 men while they sleep. "And when they arose early in the morning, behold, they were all dead corpses." I guess they all woke up and said, "Shucks, I'm dead." 19:35
Josiah, apparently with God's approval, kills "all the priests of the high places" and sacrifices them to God on their altars. Note that this is a guy who "did what was right in the eyes of the Lord" (2 Kg.22:2). 23:20
Even though Josiah did all that God asked of him, God still punished him and all Jerusalem for the acts of his grandfather. 23:26
1 Chronicles
God killed Er for being "evil in the sight of the Lord." 2:3
God kills Uzza for trying to keep the ark from falling. 13:9-10
David kills 7000 men in chariots and 40,000 footmen. 19:18
David tortures all the inhabitants of several cities "with saws, and with harrows of iron, and with axes." 20:3
God kills 70,000 men because David had a census. 21:7
2 Chronicles
Solomon, when dedicating the temple, killed 22,000 oxen and 120,000 sheep. All the blood, guts, pain, and suffering must have made God very happy. 7:5
God kills the king of Israel and helps Abijah kill 500,000 Israelites. "The children of Judah prevailed, because they relied upon the Lord God of their fathers." (That is, they had God on their side.) 13:15-20
In the largest single God-assisted massacre in the bible, Asa, with God's help, kills one million Ethiopians. 14:8- 14
"God did vex them with all adversity." Consequently, "nation was destroyed of nation, and city of city." 15:6
Whoever that does not seek the God of Israel should be executed. 15:13
If you're not careful, god will kill your wives and children. Then he'll make you so sick that your bowels will fall out. He's just that type of guy. 21:14-19
Amaziah, with the help of God, kills 10,000 people; another 10,000 he left alive so that he could have them thrown off a cliff to break them in pieces. 25:11-12
Pekah kills 120,000 people in one day "because they had forsaken the Lord God of their fathers." 28:6, 8
The priests kill bullocks, rams, and lambs. The blood of the dead animals is then sprinkled on the altars. 29:22, 24
God gets angry with his people, so he sends the king of the Chaldees to kill all the "young men with the sword." He has compassion for no one, not even old men that are "stooped for age." In his tender mercy and loving kindness he has them all slaughtered. 36:16-17
Esther
Esther has two men "hanged on a tree." 2:23
Esther has another man (Haman) hung. 7:6, 10
Our heroine (queen Esther) suggests that the ten sons of Haman should also be hanged. So "they hanged Haman's ten sons. 9:13-14
The Jews kill 75,000. 9:16
Job
God (or Satan) sends a wind that kills Job's sons and daughters. 1:19
Psalms
God will hit heathens with a rod of iron and "dash them in pieces." 2:8
Christians often say that one should love the sinner but hate the sin. Perhaps, but God hates sinners and plans to destroy them. 5:5-6
God will rain fire and brimstone on "wicked" folks. 11:6
The God of peace teaches us how to kill our neighbors in war. 18:34
If God doesn't like you, he will burn you to death. 21:9- 10
A sweet prayer for the destruction of one's enemies: Let their way be dark and slippery: and let the angel of the LORD persecute them.... Let destruction come upon him at unawares." 35:6,8
If you forget God, God will tear you into pieces. 50:22
If you don't trust in God, he'll kill you and while you're dying the "righteous" will laugh at you. 52:5-7
The psalmist devoutly prays: "Break their teeth, O God, in their mouth, ... let them be cut in pieces." He says that "the righteous" will rejoice when he sees "the wicked" being dismembered by God. He'll even get a chance to "wash his feet in the blood of the wicked." Now that's entertainment! 58:6-10
The psalmist asks God to kill all "the heathen" and not show them any mercy. 59:5
God will laugh at the heathen as he kills them. 59:8
"Consume them in thy wrath, consume them ..." -- more sweet prayers to a savage god. 59:13
God will "wound the head of his enemies" so that the righteous can dip their feet in blood. And the dogs will lick the blood of God's enemies. 68:21, 23
The psalmist prays that his enemies be tormented and blinded by God. He asks God to "make their loins continually to shake." 69:22-28
The psalmist asks God to " do unto them as unto the Midianites ... which became as dung for the earth." 83:9- 18
God gives the lions their meat. The cruelty and brutality of nature is all part of God's plan. 104:21
The psalmist recounts God's treatment of the Egyptians: "He smote the firstborn in their land." See Ex.12:29-30 for the gory details. 105:29-36
God is praised for the creative ways that he kills people: by drowning, earth-swallowing, and burning. 106:11-19
God will "fill the places with dead bodies." 110:6
God is praised for slaughtering kings, nations, and little babies. 135:8, 10
"To him that smote Egypt in their first born: for his mercy endures forever." 136:10
God "overthrew Pharaoh and his host in the Red sea: for his mercy endureth for ever." 136:15
God "smote great kings: for his mercy endureth for ever." 136:17-18
Happiness is smashing your little children against the rocks. 137:9
The psalmist excels at hating. He hates people with a "perfect hatred." 139:19-22
A prayer that God will burn people to death. 140:10
The God of Peace teaches us to kill each other in war. 144:1
Proverbs
Beating your children with a rod is a sure sign of parental love. 13:24
Beat your children and don't stop just because they cry. 19:18
How could "the blueness of a wound" or "stripes [on] the inward parts of the belly" cleanse away evil? 20:30
Beating your children will make them less foolish. Have you beaten your child today? 22:15
Beat your children hard and often. Don't worry about hurting them. You may break a few bones and cause some brain damage, but it isn't going to kill them. And even if they do die, they'll be better off. They'll thank you in heaven for beating the hell out of them. 23:13-14
Whip horses, bridle asses, and strike the backs of foolish people with rods. 26:3
Beating your children will make them wise. 29:15
Beat your servants (slaves), as though they were your children. 29:19
If you mock your father or disobey your mother, the ravens will pick out your eyeballs and the eagles will eat them. 30:17
"The wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood." 30:33 Isaiah
If you associate or gird yourself, God will break you in pieces. 8:9
God will make every man kill his brother and then force him to eat "the flesh of his own arm." 9:19-20
God will "smite the earth with the rod of his mouth, and with the breath of his lips he shall slay the wicked." 11:4
On God's day he will kill sinners with great anger, wrath, and cruelty. 13:6-9
If God can find you, he will "thrust you through," smash your children "to pieces" before your eyes, and rape your wife. He will have no mercy, but will even kill your little children. 13:15-18
God will slaughter children "for the iniquity of their fathers." 14:21
The God of Peace will set brother against brother and kingdom against kingdom. Then he'll make the survivors seed the counsel of "wizards," and subject them to a "cruel lord." 19:2
God is furious at everyone and is ready to kill them all. Or as Isaiah so delicately puts it: "Their stink shall come up out of their carcasses, and the mountains shall be melted with their blood." 34:2-3
God's sword "will be bathed in heaven." Sounds like a place to stay away from to me. 34:5
God's sword is "filled with blood," and he fully intends to use it. He'll kill so many people with it that the "land shall be soaked with blood." 34:6-8
An angel of God kills 185,000 men. "And when they [those killed by the angel?] arose early in the morning, behold, they were all dead men." 37:36
God will "go forth as a mighty man" who cries and roars, and "will cry like a travailing woman." After he tires of roaring and crying he'll "destroy and devour." What a guy. 42:13
No astrologer, stargazer, or prognosticator will be able to save those that God plans to burn to death. 47:13-14
God "will do his pleasure on Babylon." That is, he will mercilessly slaughter the Babylonians. 48:14
God will make the bad guys eat "their own flesh" and then make them "drunken with their own blood." 49:26
God's clothes will get stained with the blood of humans. 63:2-6
God will "plead with all flesh" with fire and sword, "and the slain of the Lord shall be many." 66:16
The carcasses of those killed by God will be piled high. They will rot and burn forever. And although their stench will be revolting to humans, it will be a sweet savour unto the Lord. 66:24
Jeremiah
God tries to "correct" people by killing their children. 2:30
Jeremiah says that we have a choice: either cut off "the foreskins" of our hearts or be burnt to death by God. 4:4
God will bring evil to destroy cities and wipe out all of the inhabitants. 4:6-7
What was once fruitful is now barren. Birds have fled, people are gone, towns are in ruins. All "by his (God's) fierce anger." 4:25-26
God sends plagues and violence to correct people. 5:3
God will send lions and leopards to tear people into little bitty pieces. 5:6
God again talks of bringing a foreign nation to destroy his chosen ones and their lands. 5:15-17
"I am full of the fury of the Lord; I am weary of holding it in." He's anxious to "pour it out" on children, young men, husbands, wives, and old people. 6:11-12
God plans to kill pretty much everyone: Fathers and sons, family, friends, and neighbors. God plans to kill them all after laying a stumbling block before them, just to make sure. 6:21
God will send soldiers from the north that will kill everyone and have no mercy. 6:22-23
God will pour out his anger on both man and beast. Not even the trees will be spared from his wrath. And the ground itself will burn forever. 7:20
God will feed the people to the birds and the beasts, "and none shall fray them away." 7:33
God will cover the earth with dead bodies that will not be buried. "They shall be for dung upon the face of the earth." 8:2
People will choose to kill themselves, rather than be killed by their vicious God. 8:3
God will give the people bad food and water, and then kill them with a sword. 9:15-16
God will kill children and young men, and the dead bodies "shall fall as dung .... and none shall gather them." 9:21-22
"Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will punish all them which are circumcised with the uncircumcised." I guess that'd include just about everyone -- well, all the men anyway. 9:25-26
Jeremiah prays for the destruction of the people that don't know God or call on God's name. 10:25
God "will bring evil upon" people from which they will not be able to escape. And if they cry out to him for help, he will not help them. 11:11
God forbids others from praying for his victims. Such prayers would go unanswered anyway, he says, because he "will not hear them in their time of trouble." 11:14
God will punish the people by killing their young men in war and starving their children to death. 11:22
Jeremiah asks God to drag away his enemies like "sheep for the slaughter." 12:3
God's sword will "devour" everyone until "no flesh shall have peace." 12:12
If any nation does not listen to God, he "will utterly pluck up and destroy that nation." 12:17
God plans to make everyone in the kingdom drunk and then "dash the fathers and the sons together." The merciful God of Peace vows to "not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy them." What a guy. 13:13-14
God will ignore the peoples' prayers and sacrifices, promising to kill them all instead by war, starvation, and disease. 14:12
God will destroy by famine and sword those who are misled by the prophets, as well as the prophets themselves. 14:15-16
God plans to do four things to his people:
kill them with swords,
tear their flesh with dogs,
have the birds, and
the beasts eat their bodies.
Why will he do these terrible things? Because of something some former king did. 15:2-4
God again threatens Jerusalem with mass destruction. Here are some of the highlights: He will kill children, make more widows than there are grains of sand, terrorize cities, and then kill the survivors. 15:7-9
God will have you enslaved and, if you make him mad enough, he will burn you to death. 15:14
God has ordained that everyone "shall die of grievous deaths," and that they shall neither "be lamented" nor even buried, but "they shall be as dung upon the face of the earth." 16:3-7
God will kill children if their parents worship other gods. 16:10-11
If you don't honor the Sabbath, God will burn you to death unquenchable fire. 17:28
God admits that he does evil things to people. 18:11
Jeremiah asks God to kill the young men in war and the children by starvation. 18:21
God will do so much evil to the people that whoever hears of it will have their ears tingle. 19:3
God will make parents eat their own children, "and they shall eat everyone the flesh of his friend." 19:7-9
After Jeremiah is roughed up and arrested on the orders of Pashur the priest, he threatens Pashur and his friends, family and all of Judah with captivity and slaughter. Because of the actions of one man. 20:4
God will break those who worship other gods as though they were made of clay, killing so many that there will not be enough room to bury them all. 19:11-13
God will fight and kill everyone "both man and beast," "with a strong arm" and a great pestilence. 21:4-6
God will deliver Zedekiah and those that survive the famine, disease, and war into Nebuchadrezzar's hand, and "he shall smite them with the edge of the sword; he shall not spare them, neither have pity, nor have mercy. 21:7
God tells the Judeans to either surrender to the Babylonians and become their slaves or die. "Behold, I am against thee." No kidding. 21:9-13
God will have Jeconiah's enemies kill him and his mother and then ensure that he die without leaving any sons. 22:25-30
God promises to kill everyone by war, starvation, and disease. 24:10
God will force "all the kingdoms of the world" to drink "and be drunken". Then he'll kill "all the inhabitants of the earth" with a sword. 25:26
God kills so many people that the entire earth will be covered with their dead bodies. No one is to mourn them or even bury them; "they shall be dung upon the ground." 25:31-33
God will destroy "the peaceable habitations" and make the land desolate "because of his fierce anger." 25:37-38
Anyone who disobeys King Nebuchadnezzar will be punished "with the sword, and with the famine, and with the pestilence, until I have consumed them by his hand." 27:8
God kills Hananiah for prophesying falsely. 28:16-17
God will send his usual blessings upon his people: "the sword, the famine, and the pestilence." He "will make them like vile figs, that cannot be eaten, they are so evil." 29:17-18
God will deliver Ahab and Zedekiah into the hands of Nebuchadrezzar "and he shall slay them before your eyes" and Ahab will be "roasted in the fire." 29:21-22
On Sun, 7 Mar 2004 09:30:10 -0500, in alt.tv.sopranos, Rocinante puts the lotion on it's skin or else it gets the hose again. It does this whenever it's told -
There's an important point I forgot to include in my initial post, so I am amending that here:
When Pontius Pilate asks Jesus if he knows that Pilate has the power to crucify him, Jesus tells him that his power could only come from above. The scene was played out beautifully, as it showed Jesus' total lack of fear in the face of lethal danger. If he was Tommy from Goodfellas, it would been like Tommy telling the cop to go fuck his mother.
You believe in a potential fairy tale, something which you can never verify, never witnessed, and is not only so likely to have been completely misinterpreted via it's *endless* versions, but also possibly entirely fiction.
(Note how I, unlike the likes of you, am OPEN to the IDEA that such a person existed, and may've had something worthwhile to promote/say...but that I don't simply, mindlessly, BELIEVE in it just because someone told me to, or because I've had some kind of experience that my *interpretation* led me to believe all was as it's told.)
Try english next time, I don't speak spanish, and give me something other than the fact that you're hopelessly, and so sadly, entirely brainwashed...
You might want to think again before you call my God a "hippy faggot". He's so much more of a man than you're homophobic ugly ass that the difference is literally unmeasurable. He existed before any specific point in time and he will go on living beyond any specific point in time, and you're punkass won't make a bit of difference. Later douchebag.
Sorry...I meant "make-believe character of a best-selling novel portrayed as a hippy faggot."
Is that better? I'm not that well-versed with the fiction section.
Why not check out Scientology instead? Then you could worship your god as the recently deceased L Ron Hubbard, and perhaps actually speak with people who knew the dude. At least then you'd have a greater chance at actual accuracy.
Personally, my God is Frodo Baggins. And he could KICK your jesus's ass ANY DAY.
He existed before any specific point in time and he
That was one of the best counter arguments I've heard yet. Suspenseful...intriquing...dramatic yet convincing....
I would like to see Jesus, or any character in Christian Mythology fight Hercules or any character of Greek Mythology.
Except for that 7 headed monster in Revelations in the bible, or the fire breathing dragon, nothing else Christian mythology has can take on those from Greek Mythology.
JOB 41:19..... Out of this mouth go burning lamps, and sparks of fire leap out. Out of his nostrils goeth smoke, as out of a seething pot of caldron. His breath kindleth coals, and a flame goeth out of his mouth.
Isaiah 34:7 And the unicorns shall come down with them, and the bullocks with the bulls; and their land shall be soaked with blood, and their dust made fat with fatness.
Revelation 12:3 "...and behold a GREAT RED DRAGON, having SEVEN HEADS and ten horns, and seven crowns upon his heads."
2 Kings 18:27 Hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
Malachi 2:3 Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces!
And thou shalt eat it as barely cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man..." - Ezekiel 4:12
"Lo, I have given thee cow's dung for man's dung and thou shalt prepare thy bread therewith" - Ezekiel 4:15
Is this indecent? Should children be allowed to have access to a book with such indecent
material like this? What do I explain to my child when they ask me why people are eating
shit and drinking piss and baking bread with shit?
The FCC should fine the BIBLE!
"If any one comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple." - Luke 14:26 (Jesus)
I listed where they are in the bible, look them up. Of course most people never know about them,
because they are never read allowed in Church, and only atheist read the bible all the way through from
front to back. That's how they become atheists.
Go to church on Sunday and ask the minister. Also tell him you want him to read allowed from those
passages this week. Then ask him in front of the audience, where Cain's wife came from. When he
tries to give the usual answer they give "that it was his sister" you have a choice. You can them
corner him into admitting that God approved of incest, and that it was the only way we could all be here
from only two people. Or you can ask him how the hell he knows it was his sister and not his mother
as it does not mention this anywhere, nor does Cain's wife get a name like all the other characters in
the novel do.
Church is fun when you come prepared to make them look like fools in front of their entire cult.
According to apogryphical books (those writings not included in the bible) Adam and Eve did have many other children besides the three mentioned. But that would still mean Cain married his sister.
I don't have the time nor desire to read any fiction, so I'm glad there's someone out there doing it and calling them on it.
I do the same thing with law, hassling cops and attorneys with why they so rarely actually follow proper procedure, making them look like imbeciles.
Tons of fun. The drawback is that most of the people I study law with are fundamentalist christian, since our laws and background in this country evolved around christianity to at least a certain extent (christians will claim more, non-christians will of course claim less).
The part that pisses me off about the above, is that christians will NEVER acknowledge the fact that Natives lived here before the christains came along and killed/pushed the Natives out of the way. "Savages," as they so arrogantly call them.
Religion as a whole is a disgusting disease; but I believe christians are the worst of them all. They're incredibly brainwashed SICKOS.
"righter" wrote in message news:OzB2c.6400$[email]...
or
beating
death
and
WOULD
Jesus Christ is a character in a story like Harry Potter except that Harry is at least original. If you want to lose your faith, read about Horus, Mithra or Dionysus. All 3 are examples of people like Jesus, all fake prophets but all with the SAME STORY!! Stupid christian, open your mind and read something besides your Bible. The bible is a book of Rated R fiction
"Angle Subsided" wrote in message news:gHM2c.3128$[email]...
it
character,
was
and
one
a
never
and
It may interest you to know that I don't go by everything that's in the Bible, for the very simple reason that many many men had their input into that book, and it is subject to error. As far as whether I want to lose my faith or not, let me think--NO, I don't think so, but thanks for the offer. Do you have any shit pies? I might be more likely to eat one of those.