I suggest every Seinfeld fan ought to read this article's part 2 (How it should have ended). While I disagree with almost every author's sentence in his article's part 1 (What went wrong), I must admit that his version of Seinfeld's "last episode" is one of the best I have read since the show famous (or infamous) end.
Link to full article: http://www.tv-now.com/pilato/seinfeld.htm
============================================ Herbie J Pilato "How It Should Have Ended" (c) July 2001 .. Herbie J Pilato
The camera fades in. Jerry's apartment. It's morning. We see Jerry tossing and turning in bed. He's dreaming of the last nine years. His parents in Florida. George. George's parents. Elaine. Kramer. Newman. Mr. Bookman, the library detective. The virgin. The low-talker. The close-talker. The puffy shirt. Teri Hatcher's hot Sidra ("They're real, and they're spectacular!"), and all of the other eccentrics he's come to know.
He awakens.
"What's it all mean?" he wonders aloud. Thinks a second, then, "Eh.it's probably nothin'."
That evening, George, on a whim (but really because he's bored), decides to set Jerry up on a blind date.
"This could be the one," George tells his best friend.
"Yeah," Jerry replies with a measure of apprehension, "maybe it's time."
"You've got to meet this girl," George goes on to say. "You won't believe your eyes."
"But I'm really not concerned so much with my eyes, as I am with hers," Jerry says. "As well as her nose, her mouth, and various other pertinent body parts and districts." He thinks a moment, and then asks, "Is she good lookin'?"
"Good lookin' doesn't begin to describe her," George returns. "As a matter of fact, she's indescribable. Without description. This girl cannot be described."
"So, she's undesirable?" Jerry jokes.
"Come on," George insists, "give her a chance."
Jerry gives in. "Alright. Alright. One chance, and one chance only."
"Thank you, Sir," George replies.
"And by the way," Jerry warns, "this is your last chance."
We then hear the strum of Seinfeld's theme guitar and cut to the following Saturday. George arranges for Jerry to meet this mystery woman at Monks, the gang's home-away-from-home for the last near-decade.
At the allotted time, the woman walks in.
To Jerry's and our utter surprise, it's Elaine.
Both Jerry and Elaine who, of course, once dated, feel duped by George.
But we kind of like it.
At first, they laugh. Next, they become a little angry, then begin to discuss how meeting this way (and anything that could develop from it) may have its perks.
"Hey," Elaine figures, "I've done worse."
"Well, I haven't," Jerry jokes. "This is as bad as it gets."
On that note, Kramer rushes in with Newman and his little acting friend, Micky.
"Then again." Jerry adds.
"Guess what?" Kramer screeches.
They all look at him, as if to say, "Yeah.??"
"I've been pegged by a Hollywood producer to star in my own TV sitcom."
"Oh, you're pegged alright," Jerry says.
"And I've got a supporting role," adds Newman.
"Really pegged," Jerry adds.
"Me, too," says Micky.
"Pegged like you wouldn't believe," Jerry adds once more.
Kramer explains: "I play a character named Mr. Fix-It Doctor, which also doubles as the show's title. He's a plumber-slash-psychologists who knows all too well how to drain the pipes and emotions of others. And it's about the funny situations that stem from there. The premise is really out there."
"And I'm outa' here," Jerry interjects.
"You and me both," Elaine chimes in.
We cut to George's apartment. We see him watching TV on the sofa. There's a knock at the door. It's Susan, his thought-to-demised fianc�e.
"You can't be here," George states in shock. "You're dead!"
"No so, George," Susan replies. "No so."
"But the poison glue from our wedding invitations? What about that?"
"All a lie," Susan replies. "I lied, George. And I learned from the master."
"Of my domain?"
"Bingo."
"So now what?"
"I tell you what. We're getting married. That's what."
Back at Jerry's apartment, Jerry and Elaine are in the living room. They've just returned from their date. And as it turns out, sparks have indeed flown. They retreat into Jerry's bedroom. The next morning, the two decide they've always been in love, and to marry. As we view their bliss, we cut to George's distorted face. Then to Kramer, Newman and Micky flying to LA.
The screen goes black. We hear, "Cut!"
The lights go on. We see Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer reassembled in Jerry's apartment. The camera pulls back. The living room is really a TV set. There's the production crew. The audience.
"See you later, Jerry," George says, walking off to one side of the set.
But it's not George, the character saying this to the TV Jerry, but Jason Alexander, the actor, saying this to the real Jerry.
"Good night, Jason," Jerry replies, adding, "Julia.Michael," as in Luis Dreyfus and Richards.
All these years, Seinfeld has really been a show-within-a-show.
And that arc of episodes, in which Jerry and George create their own sitcom for NBC? Well, those outings really displayed a show-within-a show-within-a show premise.
But wait -there's more.
The screen goes black once again.
The lights reappear.
We're back in Jerry's bedroom.
The show. The no-show. The show-within-a show. The show within a show within a show.
All of it was."nothing but a dream."
We think.