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Hank's Unmentionable Problem Writers: Greg Daniels, Mike Judge
Director: Adam Kuhlman
===============================================================================Production Code: 4E07 U.S. Airdate: 2/22/97 Capsule Revision: D - 5/10/97
===============================================================================
- TV Guide Synopsis
A concerned Peggy inadvertently spreads the word about Hank's bout with constipation, leav- ing her husband flushed with embarrassment. Voices: Kathy Najimy, Mike Judge.
- Did You Notice...
Jason Hancock:
... Hank turns the channel with the VCR rather than the TV?
... Bill, Dale, Boomhauer, and Hank's father are pallbearers at Hank's
"funeral"?
... Bill, Dale, and Boomhauer have algebra homework to turn in?
... the picture of a cat hanging from a rope in the sigmoidoscopy room?
... "faux-fu" costs $2.15 a pound?
... Hank kicks the moxibutionist with his right leg?
... the toilet paper in the ladies' room is hung in the "improper overhand
fashion?"Ondre Lombard:
... Hank would've gone if he had've eaten the muffins? (because
Ladybird had to keep going after she was fed the muffins)
... in Peggy's dream, Hank's pallbearing father is hanging off the
coffin?
... there is no epitaph, name or birth/death year on Hank's tombstone?
... the man in the hopsital waiting room looks like Bill?
... how patronizing Dr. Morley is?
... Bobby comes in, going "Woah! Dad, what are they doing to you" even
though it seems Dr. Morley never put the camera in Hank's anus?
... Hank tries Dale's bacon grease idea? (which we never get to see)- Previous Episode Similarities
[4E01] Peggy tells a stranger detailed personal information about Hank [4E01] Hank shouting "Get!" [4E02] C. Everett Koop is mentioned; also, Hank ends the show on top of his lawnmower with a speech [4E04] The Hills eat at Luly's Cafeteria
- Animation and Continuity Goofs
The theme song shows Luanne with her old boyfriend Buckley, who she left in 4E04.
Bobby's bowl of ice cream disappears.
As Hank heads back to the receptionist's desk, the clock on the wall behind the receptionist has no hands. {jh}
Before the nurse comes in, Hank is wearing his shoes. When he takes off his pants, he is out of his shoes without ever taking them off.
It's daytime when Hank gets up off the toilet and his glasses fall in. So why is it when he really has to go moments later, Bobby is in pajamas, brushing his teeth for bed?
- Freeze Frame Fun
TODAY'S
SPECIAL
BLACK
BEAN
BURRITONO GOAL IS TOO HIGH IF WE CLIMB WITH CARE AND CONFIDENCE
- Comments and Other Observations
What's that darn dog's name, again?
Jason Hancock: "We finally learned that the name of the Hills' dog is Ladybird; it's probably named for the wife of former President (and Texas native) Lyndon Johnson. We also find out that Dale's wife is a TV weather lady."
For all the latest medical poop...
Jason Hancock: "C. Everett Koop was a former U.S. Surgeon General who had his own show on NBC a few years ago. He doesn't even remotely look like Howard Stern, despite Hank's comment."
Similarities to The Simpsons...
In the episode 8F01 "Mr Lisa Goes to Washington," Bart Simpson pushes all the floor buttons on the elevator, just like Bobby.
Tidbits about Hank's nudity
In an audio promo that played over the end credits of 12/31/96's episode of "The Simpsons," Hank lists off the things he won't do on his show (including the Macarena). Nudity was on the list, and he said "unless it's tastefully done." Perhaps he finds a story all about pooping is tasteful.
Also, the program in competition with King of the Hill on NBC was Steven Speilberg's "Schindler's List," which did include graphic nudity.
Luly's:
Jason Hancock gives us insight onto the reference regarding "Luly's" cafe: "Luly's cafeteria, previously seen in last week's ``Luanne's Saga'' (4E04), is a takeoff of the Luby's cafeteria chain in Texas.
- Quotes and Scene Summary
% Peggy asks Luanne how the shampoo finals at her beauty school went. She % passed lather, but failed rinse and repeat, because repeat includes rinse. % Out of the bathroom emerges Hank. Peggy reminds him to flush, but he didn't % need to since he didn't do anything. Peggy wonders how long this has been % "going on," and Hank insistantly drops the subject and goes to the % refrigerator, asking if there's any chicken-fried steak left.
% After another failed visit to the bathroom, Peggy looks concerned.. Later % that night, Peggy offers Hank some Megamucil, but he would rather Peggy not % get involved. When Peggy tells him at least to drink the water to flush out % his system, he starts deafening his ears.
% The next morning, Peggy serves Hank oat bran muffins for breakfast, instead % of sausage. While she's not looking, Hank feeds the muffins to Ladybird.
Bobby: You should eat those, Dad. They help you make.
Hank: Excuse me?
Bobby: Huh?
Hank: What are you implying?
Bobby: Well, I thought you were consti...
Hank: Where would you get such an idea? That's ridiculous. Anyway,
that's not something you should ever know about your father.
-- "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% Bobby points out that Hank was in the bathroom for an hour last night, but % Hank denies it and eats the rest of Bobby's sausage.
% Hank has to let Ladybird out again. Hank sighs, observing the dog do her % business outside, muttering, "Show off."
% Peggy discusses Hank's problem with Nancy. Hank hasn't gone for four days. % Peggy asks Nancy's opinion, and her educated guess is it could be polio.
% Now Bill knows about it.
Bill: So, Hank, what's this I hear about you being backed up?
Hank: Nothing! What? Who are you thinking about talking to --
It's not me, I'm fine.
Bill: Well that's not what I heard.
Hank: Heard from who?
Bill: Dale.
Hank: How does Dale know?
Bill: Nancy.
Hank: Nancy knows too?? That Peggy! Why not just take the door off the
bathroom and put it out on the lawn.
Bill: Oh, Hank, it happens to everyone now and then. There's no reason to
be embarrassed.
Hank: Maybe I'm not the one who should be embarrassed. Did you ever think
of that? Maybe you're going a little too much. Once every four or
five days gives me more free time. If you wanna spend all your time
on the toilet, be my guest.
-- Defying biological urges, "Hank's Unmentionable Problem" Dale: [joining in] Have you tried squatting? It takes pressure off
the lower body.
Bill: You know, Hank, I find a ride on the lawnmower helps.
Hank: Would you please stop talking about this?
[Boomhauer stops by in his Dodge with a woman]
Boomhauer: Hey, Hank, you know I've been thinking about y'all and your
dang'ol bottom and all and what's gonna get it movin' again; I
think y'all ought go jogging or swimmin' like water bugs(?) man,
it's gonna be havin' you poopin' just like you used to, man.
God knows it's gonna work.
Woman: It helped my Ant after her pregnancy.
Hank: I don't know you, do I?
Woman: No, you don't.
-- Solutions to "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% Hank tells everyone to just leave him be. Boomhauer drives off. Dale keeps % persisting, though, offering a suggestion involving a spoonful of bacon % grease. Hank interrupts, declaring he won't eat bacon grease. "You didn't % let me finish." Hank sighs.
% Peggy watches a TV program featuring surgeon general C. Everett Koop, who % warns that constipation can be a symptom of a more serious condition. Hank % asks Peggy why she told Nancy about his "bathroom shortcoming," then sees % Koop discussing the process of bowel movements. Failing to recognize who's % on TV, Hank changes the channel in disgust to see Nancy incorporating best % wishes to Hank on his problem into her weather segment. Hank tries to change % the channel before Nancy can completely say "constipation," to see Koop % finishing Nancy's sentance. In anger, Hank kicks out the TV plug.
Hank: Peggy, why'd you do this to me? Now everybody knows.
Peggy: Well, Hank, I was worried.
Hank: So, worry to yourself.
Peggy: I'm tired of worrying to myself. It's better to talk things out,
Hank.
Hank: Not these things. Not toilet things.
-- "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% Peggy tells Hank she'll placate him by worrying to herself.
% At Luly's cafe, Hank orders skirt steak, brisket, New York steak, steak % fingers and a burger. When Peggy tells him to get at least one vegetable, % Hank complies by ordering macaroni and cheese.
% While Hank rides on the lawnmower, Bobby finds Peggy making chocolate sauce % in the kitchen and asks for some, but Peggy says no because it's actually a % laxative for Hank.
% Hank really seems to like the taste of the chocolate sauce on his ice cream. % He offers some to Bobby, and Peggy reminds Bobby of what it is, to which he % says, "So?" As to be expected, Bobby spills the beans that it's a laxative. % Hank spits out the ice cream and scolds Peggy.
Hank: You're trying to drug me?? Good god. That's going too far!
Peggy: Well, you won't talk to me about it. And what if it is
something really serious, like polyps, or worse? You should see a
doctor.% Hank angrily tells Peggy to stop making a big deal out of it and storms off. % Meanwhile, Bobby eats the laxative ice cream.
% At night, Peggy dreams that Hank died from his constipation. Peggy, Bill, % Dale, Boomhauer, Luanne and Bobby are at the funeral. Boomhauer cries, % mourning "Why?!" in his usual draw. Dale says, "It should have been Bill."
Oh, Hank, we never got a change to talk about your constipation. And now,
we never will.
-- Peggy, mourning over Hank in her dream, "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% C. Everett Koop is even there, saying, "Early detection is the key. Now pass % in your algebra homework." Dale, Boomhauer and Bill give Koop their papers. % Hank's father says, "Goodbye, boy! See you in hell!" and turns the flush on % Hank's tombstone, causing Hank's coffin to drain into the grave (with a % flushing sound, too). Peggy awakens and rushes into the bathroom, where Hank % is trying to do his business.
Hank: Uh, occupied!
Peggy: Oh Hank, you're alive!
Hank: Close the damn door! Can't you see I'm in here, Peg? [Peggy
starts hugging him] Don't, no, don't touch me! I'm on the john!
Get out of here!
Peggy: Hank, I was so scared. I dreamed you died. You didn't see a
doctor, you didn't listen to Koop.
Hank: Peggy, you're not suppose to see this!
Peggy: Listen, Hank, I love you. Please don't die on me.
Hank: I love you too, but... Oh geez. All right, I'll see a doctor if you
just get out, and leave me be.
Peggy: You will?? Oh, Hank! Oh that's wonderful.
Hank: [shooing her] Yeah well, come on, get a move on!
Peggy: Oh, thank you. [walks out]
Hank: Get!
[a roll of toilet paper is thrown at the door]
-- "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% [End of Act One. Time: 8:22]
% At the Heimlech County Medical Center, Hank goes to see Dr. Morley. When % asked why, Hank has immense difficulty trying to tell the receptionist. % Consequently, he's told to write down his problem on a form. Bobby finds a % model of the large intestines blows into the tube, creating a loud noise. % Peggy tells him, "Bobby, put that down, you don't know where it's been." % Hank writes down the purpose of his visit, illegibly. Surprisingly, Hank % sees his 3rd Grade teacher Mrs. Macintosh.
Mrs. Macintosh: Why are you here, Hanky? This is an old person's doctor.
Peggy: Well, Hank hasn't been able to take a...
Hank: ...a walk. I threw my knee out playing touch football.
-- Third grade teachers: there for your most embarrassing moments,
"Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% The receptionist has failed to read what Hank's problem is. To futher his % subterfuge, Hank fakes a leg injury as he nears the woman to clarify his % ordeal.
% In the examination room, Dr. Morley asks Hank when he had his last bowel % movement. "Five days," answers Peggy for Hank. "And Hank's usual schedule % is every two days. Of course, when we were first married, he'd go everyday. % But then I spoke to his mother and she said the most interesting thing. When % he was a teenager, he would be in that bathroom three or four times a day..." % Hank interrupts by shouting "Peggy!" Morley thinks this information is % helpful, and goes to prepare for a sigmoidoscopy. A nurse comes in and asks % Hank to take off his pants.
% Bobby's wandering around the hospital, looking into rooms. Meanwhile, Hank % hesitantly unzips his pants, then decides not to take his pants off till % Morley returns. The nurse comes in and tells him to take off the pants, and % he does. He then just stares at a jar of cotton balls.
Uh, why look at that, Peg. Cotton balls. White ones. Heh.
Whole jar of 'em.
How many do you think there are in there?
I'll bet thirty. [pause]
Yep. Thirty.
-- Hank, waiting for Dr. Morley with his pants off,
"Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% In the sigmoidoscopy room, Dr. Morley returns. Hank, in nothing but a % hospital gown, goes onto the examination table, facing the wall while Dr. % Morley looks through Hank's, well, you know. A woman named Tosha, who is a % medical student, comes in to watch the examination.
% In the elevator, Bobby pushes the buttons to every floor and walks out. In % comes a harried husband, his expecting wife and a doctor. The elevator is % going through every floor gradually. By this time, the baby has been born.
% Dr. Morley shows Hank the rectal camera used to get an inside view of his % colon. Sighing, Hank says, "Just kill me now." Bobby walks in.
Bobby: Mom, I'm hungry... Woah! Dad, what are they doing to you?
Hank: Bobby, get outta here!
Dr. Morley: No, Mr. Hill. When a family faces an illness, all family
members should be involved. Remember, they're your get-well
team. Hey there, Ace. Do you like video games?
Bobby: Yeah!
Dr. Morley: This joystick is just like a video game joystick. Only my red
button fires a real laser.
Bobby: Cool!% Bobby aims the stick at Hank, playing with it and annoying Hank. Dr. Morley % tells Hank it doesn't hurt to smile and decides to begin the procedure. % Everyone sees the twists and turns of the inside of Hank's colon. Dr. Morley % even says that Hank's colon if laid out in a straight line would cover the % Earth. "Now, how can that be?" questions Hank. "The Earth is twenty five % thousand miles around. A piece of steak would have to shoot through your % system faster than the speed of light. That's impossible." Dr. Morley % replies, "Well, Mr. Hill, there's certainly nothing going through your % intestines that fast." Bobby is intrigued, and apparently has a new % aspiration: to be a proctologist.
% Later on, Peggy becomes tired from sitting around the room for so long. So % everyone stretches while Hank still lies on the table uncomfortably.
% Since Dr. Morley can't pinpoint what the problem is, he decides he must % remove something from Hank's colon surgically. Peggy asks him to give Hank's % low-fat, high-fiber diet more time to work. But just to be safe, Morley % books an appointment anyway.
% [End of Act One. Time: 14:50]
% At the "Soy to the World" health food store, Peggy finds "Not Dogs," a tofu % substitute for hot dogs. When Hank rejects it, the store man offers him % FauxFu, a tofu substitute for the tofu intolerant.
Peggy: Now, would that be good for a man who's constipated?
Hank: Peggy...
Peggy: Well, I didn't say it was you.
Man: Is this for your husband?
Peggy: Yes. And we will also take a quart of your brown rice broth.
Hank: Do you have anything here that tastes good?
Man: [looking around] Uhh... no.
-- "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% Luanne shows Hank a flyer for an acupuncturist.
Hank: What the hell is that?
Luanne: He sticks needles in your skin and sets them on fire.
Hank: Anyone ever try that on me, I'll kick his ass.
-- Suggesting an acupuncturist to solve "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% Hank, apparently eating his health food snacks, watches a football game. % Peggy tells him to use the bathroom. On the toilet, Hank overhears Peggy % passing up Hank's chance to help Dale with his fence.
% Hank cooks bacon, throws the bacon away and pours the grease into a cup, % apparently giving Dale's idea a shot.
% This time, Hank has fallen asleep on the toilet. Peggy comes in and puts a % blanket on him.
% Hank's really desperate. He's even decided to give Mr. Li's Moxibustion % treatment a go. As Hank promised, he does kick Mr. Li in the butt-- % literally.
% At Luly's, the Hills, Luanne, Dale, Boomhauer and Bill all are having ribs, % while Hank looks glumly at his dinner of unrecognizable health food. Peggy % thanks everyone for coming to help cheer Hank up. Hank excuses himself for % the bathroom. When Hank and Peggy see the men's room locked, Peggy bangs at % the door. When it won't open, she takes Hank into the women's room.
% Hank stares at all the girlie thinks in the women's room, like a tampon % shoot. Meanwhile, Bill is having an inane conversation about salad, when % Hank returns, with no success. "I'm sorry, Peg. I let you down. I let you % all down." Peggy reassures him that there are 24 hours left for him to go.
% In the bathroom, again, Hank stares to see everyone on his block having a % good, active day. (Bobby flashes a light up the butt of a squirrel). Peggy, % however, is talking with Nancy.
Nancy: You know, Hank seems a little... down.
Peggy: Well, he's a shell of a man.
Nancy: I never thought Hank would have the will power to give up everything
he enjoyed in life.
Peggy: Well, that's not Hank. That's me. I mean, if it was up to him,
he'd still be eating burgers in the backyard with Dale, Bill and
Boomhauer. He'd still be drinking beer and shouting at the TV set
and having a lot of fun and... hm. [looks glum]
[Hank gets off the toilet and his glasses fall into it]
Wait here!
[Hank comes out drying his glasses]
So...?
Hank: So what?
Peggy: Well I heard a... I mean, I wasn't listening, but I did hear a...
Hank: Oh, that was my glasses.
-- "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"% "Look, honey, we've gotta talk. I know you wanna help, but this is getting % out of control. You can't treat a grown man like a baby. It ain't right. I % feel like I've been trying to be someone else lately. Eating food I don't % eat--and I'm just not gonna do it anymore. And if I don't ever poop again % then that's just gonna be who I am. I'd rather die with a burger in my colon % than live and eat FauxFu.
% Peggy breaks down, admitting she only does this because she wants him to % be around a long time. Soon, she cries, telling Hank she worries about him. % The two share an emotional moment, interrupting by *surprise*-- nature's % call. He throws Bobby out the bathroom (while he's brushing his teeth). % The sound of the toilet flushing reassures everyone. Hank emerges from the % bathroom (as Beethoven's ninth symphony plays) and gets a hug from Peggy % and Bobby.
% [End of Act One. Time: 20:53]
% And now: a word from Hank Hill...
You might've noticed in tonight's episode, there was some brief nudity.
Now, as an actor, I only do nudity when I feel the script warrants it.
And I thought tonight's episode only warranted seeing the side of my rump.
You can believe me when I tell you the Fox executives were pushing for a
whole lot more. If any of you were offended by my body, I'm truly sorry.
Good night.
-- Hank, "Hank's Unmentionable Problem"- Voice Credits</A>
Starring:
Mike Judge (Hank, Boomhauer) Kathy Najimy (Peggy, Receptionist, Mrs. MacIntosh) Pamela Segall (Bobby) Brittany Murphy (Woman in Boomhauer's Car, Nurse, Luanne) Stephen Root (uncredited) (Bill) and Johnny Hardwick (Dale, Expecting Father)
Also Starring:
Ashley Gardner (Nancy, Tosha) Steven Banks (Dr. Morley, "Soy to the World" Man) Jim Cummings (C. Everett Koop) Toby Huss (Cotton)
- Reviews
Russell Brooks: This episode was lame compared to others. Think about it. Only one weak part with Boomhauer and the supporting cast. Almost no sub-plots, just Hank and his "problem." That would make for a good show, but they needed some other action to keep your interest for the whole 30 mins.
Jason Hancock: I thought this was the best of six episodes so far. I laughed my ass off no more than three times during this episode. The funniest parts for me were Hank's confusing C. Everett Koop with Howard Stern, the "consti... pation" on TV, "faux-fu," and Hank fulfilling his promise of kicking the acupuncturist in the ass. Grade: A
Yours truly: TV has seen a new age with the airing of this show. Never before have I seen 22 minutes devoted to constipation. Humurous and touching in its weird way. Grade: B.
Contributors
{jh} Jason Hancock
Legal Disclaimer
King of the Hill - Capsule 4E07 copyright 1997 Ondre Lombard ([email] Episode summaries and capsule sections not to be redistributed in a public forum without the previous consent of the author. The quotes are copyrighted property of Deedle-Dee Productions, Judgemental Films, 3 Arts Entertainment and Twentieth Century Fox. This capsule is not meant to infringe upon those copyrights. Do not back up--severe tire damage.