The premise is simple--take a classic episode of Star Trek and throw in Fry, Leela and Bender. It doesn't really remind you of the ep yet, but the plotlines sort of converge at a later point in the script and then diverge again.
This is a rough rough draft of the teaser sequence before the opening sequence is played, and as such isn't quite as dense as it should be, so feel free to recommend any changes, et cetera. And now, on to the fanscript...
FANSCRIPT: "BENDER ON THE EDGE OF FOREVER", TEASER
ACT I TEASER ----------
Fry is working the graveyard shift as the Planet Express ship meanders through space. The clock in the computer console reads 2:15 AM.
Fry presses a button on the console and a cup of coffee pops out.
FRY:
(mocking)"Short straw gets 2AM, Fry."
"Somebody has to watch the ship, Fry."
(genuine)Lousy straws.(mumbles)Fry sips his coffee and reaches for the channel changer. Fry clicks on the TV in the corner.
Click. Test pattern. Click.
TV:
"That IS incredible! I can keep my joints
oiled AND maintain a rust free shine for the
low low price of $19--"Click. Static. Click. Test pattern. Click.
TV:
(Peg)"Oh, Al! Come to bed!"
(Al)"Mmm... no."FRY:
That voice sounds familiar--
(ponders for a moment) naah.Click.
TV:
(Blob)"I know he's a horrible gelatinous
blob that ate 7 sixteenths of the population
of Mylarn IV--but I still love him!"
(Hick Guy)"I'll learn you to sleep with my robot!"
(Robot)(expletive beeped)and(bleep)your carbon
(beep)decalcif(beep)Guy gets up and starts punching blob, but the blob morphs around the guy and starts beating him on the head with a chair. The view shifts offscreen to Jerry Springer's Head In A Jar, and blood splatters on his jar.
(Jerry Springer's Head)"Hey!"
The robot throws a chair at Jerry Springer's head, which breaks the glass. Jerry's head flounders around like a fish out of water.
Fry sips his coffee and lays back in the chair. Suddenly, the reception turns to static.
FRY:
(Shrieks)TV!
Fry reaches for the clicker and frantically clicks through a few dozen channels. There's nothing but static on every channel.
Fry jumps under the console and brings out a TV Guide 3000. Calculon is on the cover, which says "CALCULON DISCUSSES LIFE, LOVE, AND PROPERLY OILED JOINTS". Fry quickly turns to a page which shows a map of the galaxy. The title at the top of the page says ROAMING AREAS.
Fry's finger moves down to a section labelled SECTOR G7A. Under it is written DEAD ZONE in big black type.
Fry quickly brings up a map of the ship's current location that looks vaguely like a game of Asteroids. The slow-moving trangle representing the ship has a caption above it that says ENTERED SECTOR G7A. Some polygonal asteroids float by.
FRY:
Agh! Stupid dead zone!
Why can't they put you somewhere like
(squints at TV Guide)sector 001?Fry looks back up at the screen, and notices that it says TIME UNTIL ENTRY INTO SECTOR G7B: 15 HOURS, 27 MINUTES, 45 SECONDS.
The clock seems to be frozen, however, because the SECONDS meter isn't moving. Fry hits the console with his hand to get it to start moving again.
FRY:
Ow!(rubs hand)
Fry massages his hand and looks at the screen again, and finds that the timer is indeed moving again. However, now the time is going _up_.
Fry grips the joystick on the console and blows away the time meter on the screen. A '500' floats up, and Fry is satisfied enough to turn away from his Asteroids game.
FRY(THINKING):
Well, it's another 53 minutes 'till your shift
is up and the TV's out... it's a good thing
you've got plenty of wholesome reading material!FRY:
Yes... reading... [rubs chin]
There's a novel idea...Fry cracks his knuckles and gets out a pair of reading glasses. Fry then opens up the TV Guide to an article on DESCENDANTS OF THE BASTARD CHILDREN OF THE CAST OF THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL--WHERE ARE THEY NOW AND OTHER RUMINATIONS BY MATT ROUSH'S HEAD. Fry sips his coffee.
Pan "camera" over to the clock, as time passes to 2:57 AM. Fry is still reading TV Guide 3000, only now he's reading the crossword at the very back.
Over Fry's shoulder, we can see:
26
M
U
S 25
E 7REVLON
5L___E
I 6DONNY
XDOWN
- ___ GREEN SHOW
- REGULARITY
ACROSS
- I ____ LUCY
- _____ AND MARIE'S HEADS
- $65,000 BLERN SPONSOR
Fry ponders for a moment, and then gets a smug look on his face and writes 'SCREWED' in for 5 across. When he discovers that it doesn't fit, he erases all of the other words, squints, and adjusts his reading glasses.
Fry sips his coffee and places it atop an intricate cup sculpture he seems to have constructed during the time elapsed. Fry struggles to place his last cup perfectly on the top of the sculpture. Just when he thinks he's gotten it, he moves his hand away, sits down, and eyes it with smug satisfaction.
At that moment, a disturbance rocks the ship. Fry falls backward in his chair, and all of his cups come raining down on his head. The alarm klaxons sound as the ship is rocked violently.
FRY:
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!
[cup falls]
Ow!Fry eyeballs the console where the cups fell from, and the coast seems to be clear. Then, very cautiously, he gets up, and bangs his head on the console above him.
FRY:
Ow!(rubs head)
End of teaser sequence.