My tele-vision friends and THE LIST

Aug 20, 1999, 5:01 AM ET4 posts by 3 postersalt.tv.futurama
4 posts

Aside from pin-ball practice, I usually unwind by watching ladies as they appear on my tele-vision. With stalking laws the way they are now, I must confess that I am no threat to anything other than those damned silverfish! I am but a harmless recluse. I just sit quietly in the basement of my manor watching local female cele-brities on my tele-vision sony trinitron screen. As my manservant Hamish fetches me iced tea, I flick the channels with my electronic remote-controlled device. Upon finding a pleasant face to study, I shout to my assistant Maria, "who is that person there in the tele-screen!?!"

Maria, quickly answers me and adds the name to my list of "tele-vision friends." I fear that this extensive list will fall into oblivion with my demise. For that damned Maria, although she knows to properly fold my under-garments, has no respect or appreciation of my list. I have caught her doodling on the margins of my list. Tarnation!!

I find the scribbled characters of Robots 3000 to be quite intriging. But enough of the small talk, I will now share with you a few of my findings...

  • Joan Lundon of a morning show
  • Lynn Russell of the CNN tv series
  • Bonnie Bernstein of sports programming
  • Shannon Miller of acrobatics
  • Elisa Donovan of the red hair variety
  • Jodie Applegate another news focused woman
  • Ann Curry news reader
  • Annie Potts of designing woman
  • the "Asian-looking" Atlanta Falcons Cheerleader
  • Christina Abernathy of the weather channel
  • Lisa Lopes of the hipster rap group

This is by no means an exhaustive list of tele-vision personalities attractive to the male viewer. It is simply the first page of my unabridged listing. I am seeking a newsgroup to post the entire list. I do no feel that this is the appropriate one. Thank you.

That's sounds a little too much like T. Herman Zweibel, editor of The Onion News-paper for my liking...

~Riptor

FlipScrip hO hO wrote in message ...

Do you not care for T. Herman Zweibel, my mentor, best friend, and father? We use to dance on the shores of the Mud River to the tunes of Gary Garpen's wild big band.

Riptor wrote in article ...

Onion