Futurama on the election

Nov 2, 2004, 12:38 PM ET4 posts by 4 posters
4 posts
Ernie Sty

[Fry and Bender are watching a cartoon]

[Enter Leela.]

Leela: There's a political debate on! Quick, change the channel!

Bender: Hey, that's what Fry said when we turned on the debate!

[Leela changes the channel herself. Two men who look remarkably alike stand at podiums. There are just two people in the audience.]

Announcer: (voice-over; on TV) C-SPAN9 presents: The Thrill Of Politics.

[Fry and Bender snore. Leela sighs and slides Fry across the couch and sits between them. They wake up.]

Leela: Look, I know there are no car chases but this is important. One of these two men will become president of the world.

Fry: What do we care? We live in the United States.

Leela: The United States is part of the world.

Fry: Wow! I have been gone a long time.

[One of the candidates, Jack Johnson, begins the debate.]

Johnson: [on TV] It's time someone had the courage to stand up and say: "I'm against those things that everybody hates".

[The other candidate is John Jackson.]

Jackson: [on TV] Now I respect my opponent. I think he's a good man but, quite frankly, I agree with everything he just said!

Fry: These are the candidates? They sound like clones. [He looks a little harder.] Wait a minute. They are clones!

Leela: Don't let their identical DNA fool you. They differ on some key issues.

Johnson: [on TV] I say your three cent titanium tax goes too far.

Jackson: [on TV] And I say your three cent titanium tax doesn't go too far enough!

Fry: If I were registered to vote, I send these clowns a message by staying home on election day and dressing up like a clown.

Leela: You're not registered?

Fry: Nope. Not vaccinated either! Besides. It's not like one vote ever made a difference.

Leela: That's not true. The first robot president won by exactly one vote.

Bender: Ah, yes. John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a cord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree.

Farnsworth: But, like most politicians, he promised more than he could deliver.

Leela: The point is, one vote can make a difference and even though it won't, I'm still taking you to get registered.

Farnsworth: Yes, that's a capital idea. Let's all go register.

Fry: Professor, when did you become so obsessed with voting?

Farnsworth: The very instant I became old.

Matthew MillerErnie Sty

Heh. That's one of my favorite Futurama lines ever.

Matthew Miller [email] <http://www.mattdm.org/> Boston University Linux ------> <http://linux.bu.edu/>
Scott HowardMatthew Miller

And educational too! The more Americans who watch Futurama and hear this fact the better! :)

Scott

NateTXErnie Sty

Woman: We favor unreasonably huge subsidies to the Brain Slug Planet.

Fry: OK, but what are the Brain Slugs who control you gonna do for the working man?

Woman: Attach Brain Slugs to them.

Fry: (sarcastic) Sure, you say that now!