alt.tv.friends awards 2000 part 2 of 4

[Show fades from black to see Tennant departing the stage and CC with a distinctly scared look on his face.]

CC:> Well that was certainly . . . . interesting. Well we'll move along swiftly or flee screaming from that to the next award since the shed is double booked tonight with the hose taming class. We would like to remind you at this point about the importance of winners making speeches. This is because the ceremony is so unfunny that we need material to distract everybody else from the fact. What better person to give an hilarious speech (of course I'm sure to fall flat on my face now) than . . .

The Funniest Poster and the nominations were . . . Jonathan Roberts Marcel (Zoepetier) Tom Hawley Coca-Cola Adeline Toni Perry

And the award goes to . . .

<*ping*>

It was close, probably the closest (thought I've only counted the first two awards at the present time) but the winner my a nose and a bit (probably an ear) was . . .

<*ping*>

Toni Perry!

[Toni looks on with surprise as she gets up to receive her award]

CC: Ladies and gentleman, where have all the ....? . . . Oh, to the bar. Well until they return we bring to you a special treat, playing a somewhat familiar song, one of my favourite bands The New Pretenders.

[Rapturous applause as the band is wheeled on. The lead guitarist and vocalist looks somewhat familiar, her hair seems to be shimmering from colour to colour and she speaks with a distinct yet subtle (gotta love it) accent.]

LG:> Hope y'all are havin' a reeeal good ole' time, hit it!

[A quiet fast drum beat builds up to a loud crescendo of instruments.]

LG:>I believe that Friends used to be the best comedy on tv I believe that it's gone downhill since the end of series 3 I believe that even Jessie was better than Friends now, it's true I believe those writers don't always do the best job that they can do I believe that the cast don't go and give it their all I believe that they'd do better with a whole lot of Red Bull!

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe Ross isn't the sweet romantic guy that we use to know I believe Rachel has changed completely as well though I believe Monica couldn't do better than with her current guy I believe that Joey makes us all laugh until we cry

I believe that one day Phoebe will completely flip I believe that Chandler's hair would look good with a little snip

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

<Instrumental>

I believe that a weird cat is just a normal little cat I believe that the black recliners will always be the best of the best I believe that we don't need a wedding every season I believe one day the producers will listen to reason

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye I believe in big yellow taxis flying up in the sky I believe that I'm getting sick of singing in rhyme I believe I'll stop it after this one final time

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye Until you say goodbye

CC:> The New Pretenders! Thanks, more from them later.

[To applause the band is wheeled off]

CC:> The nominations for the Most Missed Poster award were....

Lee Green Dionysian Don Raven Activia H*E*L*E*N*A

and the winner was . . .

<*ping*>

It's one of those long running jokes that you dislike even more as it repeats, please bear with it.

and the winner is. . .

<*ping*>

(see what I mean?)

Activia! . . . . Errr. . . anybody know how to contact her to tell her she's won?

[Show fades to black]

CC (V.O.):> Still to come on the alt.tv.friends awards 2000, Friendliest Poster and Best Overall Poster stay tuned!]

In article , "Coca-Cola" wrote:

Yay!!!!!!!!

Well done Antonia Perriawater (at last her full name can be revealed).

Yep, no kidding, I know her real name & where she lives. I'll tell her.

Tennant

<rolls eyes> Tennant it's never a good idea to start to produce names of females at award ceremonies (private joke).

Actually I used to know an Antonia, she was certainly an. . . . intriguing girl.

Always CC (Who if he carries on like this deserves to be taken away with the old relic.)

you.... what?

I'm siding with CC :)

it wasn't me I swear!!!!!

I never got Tennants post, that's wierd...

Nice to meat you, I'm Jon Chris Codapop.

Yet you have no idea what I'm going on about do you? Or is it a case of siding with me because of the 'enemy of my enemy' rule?

intriguing

I'd be somewhat scared if it was, she was certainly 'unique' but I never thought that was bad.

the

Judging by your response I'm guessing you've not seen the rest of the slander either.

Always CC

In article , "Coca-Cola" wrote:

It wasn't that bad! We said...

�** And the award goes to . . .

�** Toni Perry!

�* Yay!!!!!!!!

�* Well done Antonia Perriawater (at last her full name can be revealed).

�** and the winner was . . .

�** Activia! . . . . Errr. . . anybody know how to contact her to tell �** her she's won?

�* Yep, no kidding, I know her real name & where she lives. I'll tell her.

Activia was very surprised to hear that ATF misses her. She misses you lot as well, and she hopes to start posting again in a week or so.

Tennant

Tennant, sarcasm. Sarcasm, Tennant.

• I don't tell the truth
• Rule 1 is true

Always CC

<~~~zips her mouth shut

unique...?

hehe

In article , "Coca-Cola" wrote:

Ah - well since it was a private joke I don't understand that.

Me too. But probably not the same one.

Tennant

If you were truly doing your research well you might just get it, in fact there are tons of private jokes in the awards some more obvious than others.

Always CC

In article , "Coca-Cola" wrote:

That was *my* turn to be sarcastic...

Tennant

Congratulations, Toni! You really deserved it! :)

Will she return to ATF in the future?

In article , [email] (Marita) wrote:

She tells me she hopes to. Soon.

Tennant

aww thank you!

Repost for AOL members

[Show fades from black to see Tennant departing the stage and CC with a distinctly scared look on his face.]

CC:> Well that was certainly . . . . interesting. Well we'll move along swiftly or flee screaming from that to the next award since the shed is double booked tonight with the hose taming class. We would like to remind you at this point about the importance of winners making speeches. This is because the ceremony is so unfunny that we need material to distract everybody else from the fact. What better person to give an hilarious speech (of course I'm sure to fall flat on my face now) than . . .

The Funniest Poster and the nominations were . . . Jonathan Roberts Marcel (Zoepetier) Tom Hawley Coca-Cola Adeline Toni Perry

And the award goes to . . .

<*ping*>

It was close, probably the closest (thought I've only counted the first two awards at the present time) but the winner my a nose and a bit (probably an ear) was . . .

<*ping*>

Toni Perry!

[Toni looks on with surprise as she gets up to receive her award]

CC: Ladies and gentleman, where have all the ....? . . . Oh, to the bar. Well until they return we bring to you a special treat, playing a somewhat familiar song, one of my favourite bands The New Pretenders.

[Rapturous applause as the band is wheeled on. The lead guitarist and vocalist looks somewhat familiar, her hair seems to be shimmering from colour to colour and she speaks with a distinct yet subtle (gotta love it) accent.]

LG:> Hope y'all are havin' a reeeal good ole' time, hit it!

[A quiet fast drum beat builds up to a loud crescendo of instruments.]

LG:>I believe that Friends used to be the best comedy on tv I believe that it's gone downhill since the end of series 3 I believe that even Jessie was better than Friends now, it's true I believe those writers don't always do the best job that they can do I believe that the cast don't go and give it their all I believe that they'd do better with a whole lot of Red Bull!

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe Ross isn't the sweet romantic guy that we use to know I believe Rachel has changed completely as well though I believe Monica couldn't do better than with her current guy I believe that Joey makes us all laugh until we cry

I believe that one day Phoebe will completely flip I believe that Chandler's hair would look good with a little snip

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

<Instrumental>

I believe that a weird cat is just a normal little cat I believe that the black recliners will always be the best of the best I believe that we don't need a wedding every season I believe one day the producers will listen to reason

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye I believe in big yellow taxis flying up in the sky I believe that I'm getting sick of singing in rhyme I believe I'll stop it after this one final time

I believe in Karma, what you give is what you get returned I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye Until you say goodbye

CC:> The New Pretenders! Thanks, more from them later.

[To applause the band is wheeled off]

CC:> The nominations for the Most Missed Poster award were....

Lee Green Dionysian Don Raven Activia H*E*L*E*N*A

and the winner was . . .

<*ping*>

It's one of those long running jokes that you dislike even more as it repeats, please bear with it.

and the winner is. . .

<*ping*>

(see what I mean?)

Activia! . . . . Errr. . . anybody know how to contact her to tell her she's won?

[Show fades to black]

CC (V.O.):> Still to come on the alt.tv.friends awards 2000, Friendliest Poster and Best Overall Poster stay tuned!]

Surprise is the word! Okay I'd like to thank my mum my dad my sister... hang on a minute I've made this speach somewhere before. can I just do it again, stay up here for 8 minutes cry my eyes off and get carried off by the band or something? no? okay, well how about my rendition of smelly cat? Yes! after months and months I have learnt the chord changes and I can now play the damned song! why are you all staring at me like that? okay I'm gonna start crying now... <~~~she gets chartered off by the band.

I just realised in my original post I didn't thank the posters... I'm sorry! thank you to those that voted for me :)

Toni Perry If only wrote in message ...

You're welcome!

=+= Marcel =+=

Joey- "There already IS a Joseph Stalin!" Chandler- " You're kidding!!"

aww! you voted for me? :)))

Toni Perry wrote:

Ofcourse! Did you think I voted for myself? That's not my style..... Ain't I sweet? :-)

=+= Marcel =+=

Joey- "There already IS a Joseph Stalin!" Chandler- " You're kidding!!"

Coca-Cola spoke to me from the shadows...

-snikt-

-snikt-

Whoops, looks like I missed the awards ceremony by several days. Ah well, Jacqui was kind enough to mention them to me when I saw her in town recently.

I'm actually really touched both that any of you still remember me at all, and that one of you would actually be kind enough to nominate me. I somehow suspect that my loss to the group isn't really all that great, but it's very sweet of you nonetheless.

I wouldn't have voted for myself. ;)

Thank you.

Nice to see you both IRL and on ATF though. ;)

Jac

Jacqui spoke to me from the shadows...

-snikt-

Just dropping by. :) I'll send that email once exams are out of the way.

In article , Raven wrote:

Nice to see you here again. :)

Tennant