All Winona All the Time!
Is it the end of civilization as we know it or just more "real life is better than fiction" good time entertainment?
Should I be outraged or just amused?
Evidently, the court system isn't too bogged down for this nonsense.
I have to admit that I have always had a thing for Winona Ryder. Probably since Beetlejuice. Definitely since Heathers. It's that pixie I look sort of like a little boy but check this out I have deceptively large breasts package that I've always yearned for. She's a genius in that way. I'd pay like a hundred bucks to see her breasts. Sometimes they aren't there. Sometimes they seem enormous. Either way she's always avoided showing them off and ruining the mystery. Hey, even Molly Ringwald has done topless scenes! Hopefully, Winona's career doesn't tank. I'd hate to see her follow Dana Plato into Playboy.
How do you know their career is in big trouble?
Men: Get arrested for marijuana possession.
Women: Pose nude for Playboy.
Winona even seemed kind of smart. Having grown up hanging around Timothy Leary and all. Hell, how bad did I want to be Johnny Depp dating Winona Ryder? Even her mad dash to do celebritys made her kind of hot. Here she is working with Scorcese during the day banging the hottest rock star of the month at night. Everyone said that it made her seem shallow but in a slutty way it made me want her all the more.
I really wanted her in Girl Interrupted, but that's where the backlash started for some reason. Angelina Jolie got an Oscar while she got the blame for it's lack of commercial success. Hell, even that chick who played the nut case with the chicken carcasses under her bed is being mentioned as "the actress of her generation" these days.
Fun observations on the trial.
1) If they are going to waste taxpayer money staging this loon fest shouldn't that necessitate it being live on TV?
2) Is there anyone alive besides love sick me who thinks she's innocent?
3) Does anyone really care if she's guilty. Matthew McCaunahey got busted for playing bongo's stoned and naked in the presence of another guy and he still has a movie career.
4) Why exactly is Saks on such a crusade to get her? Do they have a rampant problem stemming from celebrity shoplifters?
5) Here's where my Economics background comes into play. Saks accuses Winona of stealing $5,000 worth of stuff. Winona is spending like $200,000 to defend herself. Couldn't they have reached a monetary agreement somewhere in between and kept the whole thing quiet?
6) I don't know about you, but if word got out that Winona regularly shoplifted at Saks, I would definitely do all my shopping there.
7) Could it be that a lot of Saks security personnel are failed jealous actors?
8) Isn't it great to see people all hung up on how much journalistic integrity they have lead the news with the Winona trial update.
9) It's not like with Pee Wee Herman and his kids show. I'm guessing that Winona's characters in Beetlejuice, Heathers, Great Balls of Fire, Reality Bites, Girl Interrupted and Alien Resurrection were all very capable of a little shop lifting.
10) Winona's attorney claims that she has receipts for all the stuff that they say she stole. Hmm. Ok, I've been accused of stealing stuff and had the receipts before. In my world, when you show the store employee the receipts they apologize and leave you alone. It takes maybe ten seconds while I fumble through my pockets to find it. Winona's been keeping hers hidden for over a year. How funny would this trial resolution be?
Winona: Here are my receipts
Judge: Apparently, Miss Ryder is innocent.
Winona: I'll be holding my press conference in the lobby.
Judge: Would Miss Ryder mind signing a photo for my grand daughter?
The most important part
It's all about power and money. How do we know? Peter Guber big time movie producer is on the jury. Amazing. He has the best seat in town. It's a wonder Al Michaels or John Madden weren't on the OJ jury. I don't know much about being a super rich executive but I'm guessing that most avoid jury duty like the plague yet somehow this guy gets picked for the most entertaining Trial of the Decade. The only thing truly shocking about the whole thing is that Jack Nickleson isn't sitting right next to him at game time.
Take a deep breath
Isn't there a war thing sort of going on?
Who cares "can you believe Girls Club only lasted two episodes." Now I'll never know if Kathleen Robertson's boyfriend really was cheating on her with his own sister.