Somebody started this many months ago... I don't know whatever became of it, but I was thinking about it the other day, and started putting together a list of my own. Submitted for your approval...
EVERYTHING I EVER NEEDED TO KNOW I LEARNED FROM "FRIENDS"
Sometimes monkeys die.
If it isn't a headboard, it's just not worth it.
Everything you hear at a poker game is pure crap.
Sometimes, after you sleep with someone, you *have* to kill a fish.
How can she grow if you won't let her blow?
Salmon skin roll.
You stop inserting the Q-Tip when there's resistance.
There's no such thing as an innocent burger.
Hug for her; roll for you.
If you go to Disneyland, you don't spend all your time on the Matterhorn (unless it's anything like 7).
You NEVER run on a barge!
It is unreasonable to expect a 12 year old to wait for a light bulb to cook brownies.
What's the opposite of man? Jam!
You don't stop for Chunkies.
God bless the chick pea.
Be your own windkeeper.
Ducks have heads.
Water rules.
Grab a spoon.