I'm full of energy right now (for reasons explained below) so I'll bash this out now, while I'm thinking about it.
What's the deal with Fans and Enthusiasm? Maybe it's just me, but I can't get my head round the fact that some people are so into stuff they'll watch the same film 50 times, and still want to keep watching it. And job descriptions: "Must be Enthusisatic". What kind of person is enthusiastic about being a Computer Network Engineer? OK, so I can picture that, but other things? What do enthusiastic people look like? Do they grin a lot? How do you show enthusiasm? It strikes me that there must be loads of words I know but have forgotten the meaning of. ("Angst" springs to mind, and "Irony"). Reading a dictionary wouldn't help, I need practical demonstrations ("See the amazing Enthusiastic Man! and the Incredible Angst girl!").
Long computer related rant, skip to the next paragraph if you want.
I'm all fired up because I've just set up a clients Web page Live on the server, (for the first time) and only after looking at it I found out that it was looking for *.JPGs, which, of course, UNIX doesn't understand, being CAPITALS, so I tried to change the names of the files, and edit the relevant HTML, only to be told I didn't have the relevant permissions, so I had to change the files on my machine, send them back across to the test server, then faff about getting them into the right groups before mirroring them across to the live server, and you know that American comedian Steve Wright, he has this gag, "You know the feeling you get when you're leaning back on a chair, and you're just about to tip over, but you catch yourself? I'm like that all the time", well I'm like that RIGHT NOW.
I wish I was a baboon. Then I could get away with screaming, baring my teeth and destroying stuff when things get stressful.
[Scene: a typical office; a baboon is squatting on a swivel chair, in front of a desk on which is a PC. It types at the keyboard, looks at the screen, pauses then types again.
Close up of computer screen: an error message box reads: "You do not have permission to make changes".
Baboon: "... EEEeeeeek! AAAAaaaaa! AAAAAAAaaaaaa!" It picks up the keyboard with both hands and begins bashing the monitor with it.]
Probably one of those blue-faced Mandrill ones. I want a baboon for a pet; they're just like dogs that can climb. Baboons are cool...
Homer: "Urge to kill falling... falling... Rising!... Falling... Gone..."
Rant over. I'll regret this in the morning. Merry Chrstmas to you all.