Should I finish this?

Since it's been rather slow on this group over the last few days, I thought I'd post one of my (unfinished) fan scripts. If it meets with everyone's approval, I'll finish it and post it on fanfiction.net or some other online showcase.

Either way, let me know what think.

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[Scene: Daria's Room] [The screen is jet black]

Daria: *moan* What the..?

[The camera switches to a view beside Daria's bed] [Daria sits up and puts her left hand to her face] [She discovers she has no eyes]

Daria: Terrific.

[Daria hears a scream from her parent's room] [The camera switches there] [Helen, in her nightgown, is sitting up with some difficulty] [It turns out she has no arms]

Helen: Jake, get up!

[Jake continues sleeping]

Helen: Jake!!

[Helen gives her husband a kick that sends him tumbling out of bed]

Jake: Huh? W-what's going on?

Helen: Something terrible's happened! Go check on Quinn!

[Helen runs out of the room] [leaving Jake to rub his eyes]

[She heads to Daria's room]

Helen: Daria, are you all right?

[The door opens] [Helen gasps]

Daria: Sure, aside from a little eye trouble.

[Jake approaches from behind Helen]

Helen: Where's Quinn

[Quinn comes out of her room, mumbling like crazy] [She has no mouth]

Daria: Well, at least there's one consolation.

Jake: Why isn't anyone SAYING anything?!

[Quinn points to Jake, then her left ear, and does a horizontal wave] [Jake quickly figures out what she means]

Jake: Oh.

[Scene: The Morgandorffer Kitchen]

Helen: *growl* This is maddening. There has to be a logical explanation.

Daria: Are you sure you didn't send God to prison.

Helen: Well, until we figure this out, none of us are going anywhere. Quinn, you and Daria can skip school today.

[Quinn coos and claps her hands]

Daria: Somehow, my heart will go on.

Helen: We'll all be going to Lawndale General. Jake, you'll have to drive since I can't grab the steering wheel.

Jake: Say, what?

[Quinn writes a message on her notepad and shows it to Jake] [It says, 'We're all going to the hospital. You're driving']

Jake: Great!! It's not one of those psychiatric ones, is it?

[Jake looks rather dumbfounded]

Jake: Did that come out right? Dammit!!

[Scene: The waiting room at Lawndale Hospital]

[The place is packed with patients that have strange conditions] [One has feet instead of hands] [Another has a cat's tail and pointy ears]

[Jane rolls up to Daria in a wheelchair]

Jane: Hey, Daria.

Daria: Jane? What are you doing here? I didn't hear you come in.

Jane: You can thank my new set of wheels.

Daria: Ouch.

Jane: I'm sure it's temporary. But, you should have seen some of the nurses. They were freaking.

[Brittney storms through the hall looking rather peeved] [Kevin follows, of course, on crutches] [He has only one leg]

Kevin: Come on, babe. You know I think you're beautiful even without a voice.

[Brittney turns around] [She mouths something rather 'loudly' at Kevin, and slaps him] [before storming away]

[Kevin still follows]

Kevin: Aw, babe.

Daria: I'm detecting a pattern here.

Jane: and it only took you how long?

Daria: I think the writer's been experimenting again.

Jane: Just ignore him and maybe he'll go away

[A sheet of paper suddenly appears on the wall] [It says, 'I heard that']

Jane: And he wonders why his novels aren't selling.

[Upchuck approaches from behind]

Daria: Hello Upchuck.

Upchuck: How did you know it was me?

Daria: I can smell that crappy aftershave a mile away...and, no, I'm not planning on wearing red spandex.

Upchuck: Too bad. I was going to ask one of you lovelies to a movie this evening.

Daria: Somehow I don't think listening to Laurel and Hardy marathon will have the same effect

[Jane raises an eyebrow at Upchuck]

Jane: Hey, Daria, run your fingers through his hair.

Daria: Excuse me??

Jane: Trust me.

[Daria waves her hands around until one of them touches Upchuck's face] [She winces] [and then pats both hands along the side of his head] [Upchuck 'shrugs' her off]

Upchuck: Okay, I'll admit it. When I woke up this morning, I was completely bald. My naturally curly coiffure was sitting on a plastic head on my nightstand. You won't tell anyone, will you?

Daria: I don't think you need to worry. Your secret's safe with us.

Jane: And I'm sure Quinn and Brittney would just love to hear it.

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As I said, I'll be adding more later on.

Feel free to comment.

Signed, Warewolf at Large

Warewolf wrote in message news:...

Re: Should I finish this?

No, please don't. This is awful. Your theme of an God-like author toying around with the Daria-cast, was already done before.

Ace Trax.

PS. This reminds me of some of my early fanfictions, which I keep hidden on my hard disk. And I am glad that those fragments never ever would be read by the public. ;-)

Hey, man. I say go for it. Although I don't encourage the self-aware cartoon idea. It's been done before, quite a few times, and there are more interesting things to be done.

Your story is outlandish, which should mean that i don't like it, but you do show a knack for Daria dialogue, and the fact that you've kept the dialogue realistic in such an unreal and non-Daria scenario is impressive. I say work on it, if for nothing else than to further hone your skills writing for the Daria cast of characters. Such unrealistic, kooky ideas are really useful for working on other aspects of the craft other than plot, in this case dialogue.

Go for it.

Andrew

It's not bad, an interesting start. You might try making it something else besides the author screwing around, though. Maybe Artie was right about those space aliens?