Dashed and Dotted Lines - By JLR
Rating: PG-13 (Adult Themes, Language)
Category: Daria/Jane slash. Drama.
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Author's Notes: This fic deals with violence, sex, and a relationship with a member of the same sex. If any of this offends you, you probably shouldn't read this. It's a sad, yet revealing fic.
Summary: Jane's fatally stabbed, leaving Daria to deal with the fact that she might lose the most important person in her life. How DOES Daria deal with it, and who is Jane's assailant?
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-[Lawndale, 2004]-
Well, here I am, 20 years old now. I'm half way through college. I'm out on my own. I'm experiencing freedom and the responsibilities that go along with it. I'm sitting in the Lawndale Memorial Hospital room 751 at 2 a.m. on a Wednesday night in late November, doing something I've never done before in my whole life. Praying. I'm so exhausted that I'm amazed I can come up with the energy to pray, much less think right now.
I wearily look over and stare blankly at the oh-so-familiar face that lies there. I can't help but flashback to the scene. The blood was everywhere. The apartment was in shambles. I look over and close my eyes as the sound of the ventilator pumping life into the body next to me lulls me. I'm so drained right now. The cops have questioned me already, as well as everyone else in our building. There is no one else to talk to, no more tears to shed.
|...Later...|
"Ms. Morgendorffer?" a deep voice rumbled. I opened my eyes and turned to the man. I recognized him as the head doctor in the Trauma room.
"Please...call me Daria," I respond, stealing a quick glance at the clock in the room. I feel slightly more refreshed and less frazzled. I must have dozed off for about two hours.
"Daria..." He started, searching for what he was going to say next. "Daria, Jane's condition is very grave at this point." I sat up a little straighter in the obligatory hospital armchair I had fallen asleep in. He continued. "The knife punctured her aorta, and almost got her left lung. She's going to be on a ventilator and have all those chest tubes for quite a while." I closed my eyes and slightly clenched my jaw in mental anguish. Seconds later I nodded my affirmative comprehension.
"Was her family notified?" I asked, using my unbreakable no-nonsense voice.
"Her brother Trent was notified. The police are trying to contact her mother and father," He said, jotting down the numbers on the monitors above Jane's bed onto a chart. He paused for a minute or two before he addressed me again. "Daria...I'm curious. Are you and Jane related?" I momentarily froze. I was expecting him to ask this eventually.
"No sir," I said, allowing my lips to curl into a rarely seen smile. "We're lovers."
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-[Lawndale, 2002]-
I looked around and lost myself in the sea of blue that was our graduation caps and gowns. So this was what we spent 13 years in Public School hell for? Highly overrated.
I managed to find Jane, Jodie, and Mack relatively close by. I sat there and listened to Principal Angela Li's speech for a good 30 minutes before I zoned out. Soon enough, I was brought back by the sound of my name over the loundspeaker.
"And now, the Valedictorian of the Class of 2002, Daria Morgendorffer!" Li barked, leading the monsterous crowd in a round of applause. I quickly stood and made my way to the stage, as practiced last week. I approached Li and she handed me my diploma, complete with an actual genuine looking smile. I nodded politely and stood at the podium to begin my speech.
"Class of 2002, parents, faculty, and families. As my classmates and I receive our diplomas and prepare for college, or whatever plans lay ahead for us, we truly have all of you to thank. We thank you for the support, the knowledge, and the discipline you all have given us. We thank you for listening, understanding, and mentoring us. Years down the road, we might forget everything we learned in our textbooks. We might lose contact with our High School friends and teachers. But we will never forget our roots. Our successes will be clear reminders of who helped us get there. When all our childhood dreams of becoming teachers, astronauts, lawyers, doctors, or what have you come true, we will remember your guidance, values, and support. Thanks again to all our parents, families, and teachers out there"
There was dead silence for almost 30 seconds before the thunderous applause began. People who never so much as layed eyes on me in the hallways between classes clapped. Teachers who dispised me because I was usually smarter than them clapped. My parents were probably clapping the loudest, while Quinn sat there looking bored, probably planning to have the color of the graduation caps and gowns changed to pink for her graduation in 2 years. Oh well. I'm finished with High School.
It was another hour and a half before we could leave. Jodie spoke eloquently as Salutatorian, and Jane's art was displayed on stage, right behind where you picked up your diplomas. We all agreed that we would meet at Pizza King to celebrate. After an hour of congratulations from my family (sans Quinn, who had scampered off with the Fashion Victims Club earlier) and classmates, I finally made it to Pizza King. I took a seat next to Jane, who had struck up a conversation with Andrea, Jodie, Mack, Brittany, and Kevin about the art she had displayed on stage.
"It was Goth, yet very eloquent," Andrea said, taking a bite of pepperoni pizza. Jane seemed pleased and smiled broadly.
"Well, I didn't have a choice. Li said it had to be "acceptable" or I wouldn't graduate," Jane explained, scarfing down some supremo pizza. Andrea began to reply, but was interrupted by another conversation at the table.
"Hey Mack Daddy, do you want to get together this summer and play some football before I go to college and become a big NFL superstar?" Kevin asked, cheese dripping out of his mouth. "I'll even autograph some stuff for you if you want." He slurped the cheese up and gave Mack his best "dumb jock" smile. Brittany was the only one who seemed to beam at the prospect of Kevin's success.
"Oh Kevvie! When you become a big star, we're going to be SOOO rich! You can buy diamond necklaces and rings and bracelets for me and... and...what's a matter Kevvie?," Brittany asked, noticing the slight palor that Kevin's skin had taken.
"Babe, what do I look like, your Honey Daddy?" He asked, with a slight look of shock. Andrea, Jane, Mack, Jodie, and I all looked at each other with amusement. The situation wasn't just funny because Kevin said "Honey Daddy" instead of "Sugar Daddy". It was funny because Kevin just *now* realized that he was her Sugar Daddy. Brittany had the boy whipped good.
Several hours and 2 Kevin and Brittany make-up/break-up cycles later, I found myself at Jane's. I was going to spend the night, so I layed my bag down on her bed and prepared for a night of sarcasm and Sick Sad World re-runs. What I got instead was something that would change my life.
"Daria..." Jane said, standing up from her perch on the floor. A second later she sat on the bed next to me. "In light of all the day's celebration and joy, I feel there is something I must confess." Her tone was not it's usual sarcastic. Her tone was a mix of fear, shame, and nerves. This was scary. This was something big.
"Ok..." I responded. Jane's slender artist hands grabbed mine. Her palms were sweaty and her face was flushed. Whatever she was going to say, she had my attention.
"Daria...we've been friends for a while now. We've been through a lot. We'll be sharing a dorm room for the next year. This isn't easy to say, but here it goes. Daria...I'm in love with you."
Holy shit.
I've waited an eternity to hear those words...
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-[Lawndale, 2004]-
I snapped out of my daydream and looked over to Jane's peaceful looking form next to me. I smiled, for I remember that night at Jane's in vivid color. I admitted that I had fallen in love with her too. Told her I had loved her since I met her. After those words were uttered, there was no more talking. There was only desire and lust.
We explored every inch of each other's bodies. We made sweet, slow, passionate love that night, bringing each other to the edge and beyond several times. I remember looking over to the clock, which displayed 5:30 a.m.; We layed in Jane's bed, cuddled, basking in the pre-dawn light that shined down upon us. It had been a night of discovery, unleashed desire, and revelations. No regrets.
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-[Lawndale, 2002]-
She layed her head on my shoulder and sighed contently. I looked over at her alarm clock and kissed her forehead.
"It's 5:30," I said, yawning. She seemed to contemplate this and I could tell she dismissed it as unimportant. We lay there in silence for a bit more before she spoke, her hand caressing my stomach.
"Have you decided what you're going to tell your family?" She asked. I froze. I hadn't thought of my family's involvement in this. I looked away from her, and she knew I was put off by her question. "You know...I already spoke to my parents. They support us 100%."
"Well, I really don't know. I'm not really sure how my parents feel about these sort of things, but I can pretty well guess that Quinn won't exactly be the leader of our support cavalry," I said, letting out a big sigh. Jane was silent for a moment. I could tell she was contemplating what I just told her.
"Why do they have to know at all?" She asked. "We'll be headed off to college in a couple of weeks, and we'll be living together. Even if shit does go down, I think we'll be ok. As long as we have each other, I think we'll be ok..."
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-[Lawndale, 2004]-
Her words echoed through my head and I allowed a couple tears to be shed. The salty liquid dropped from my cheek and landed on Jane's hand, the same one that I still held firm in my grasp. What if she never wakes up? What if I could never hold her in my arms again, or kiss her sweet lips again? Never again tell her how much I love her? The past two years with her have been phenomenal, and I don't really think I could live without her. My family knows about us now, and, surprisingly, my parents were supportive. Quinn naturally threw a fit and asked that the subject not be discussed in front of her. Ever. I didn't really expect any other reaction.
I again looked at the clock and closed my eyes when there was a sudden knock on the door. Whoever it was didn't wait for a response, and the door opened. The dark figure stood in the doorway, and I could immediately tell that it was Trent. He didn't move for a while, just stood there, looking at the bed with a blank expression.
"Trent?" I asked, slowly standing up. He didn't acknowledge me right away, and his face took on a terrible palor. I slowly approached him and helped him sit down. His eyes locked on Jane and never left her. 10 minutes later, he finally spoke to me.
"Daria," He asked, his voice shaky, "What happened?" He surveyed all the lines and tubes that came from under the blanket that covered his baby sister. He looked like he was going to be sick.
"Trent, Jane was attacked at our apartment on campus last night, about 8. Stabbed in the chest. It knicked a major artery, and she had surgery about 10:30 last night. The doctor says she's stable, but that it's too early to tell anything," I said, watching as Trent closed his eyes. He looked so shook up that I wonder if they should have let him in here like this.
"Who did this?" He asked, as a tear rolled down his right cheek.
"I don't know, Trent. The police are investigating," I explained, hoping to assuage him. It did a little bit, for he stopped shaking and stood.
"I gotta get ahold of the rest of my family. Thanks, Daria," He said, leaving the room and closing the door behind him. I sighed. I have a feeling this is going to tear Trent up more than myself or the rest of her family. He's going to feel responsible for his baby sister being harmed. I sighed. I can't help him, much less help myself right now. I curled back up in the chair with my head resting on the side of Jane's bed and closed my eyes, willing at least a little bit more sleep to come to me.
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I woke up with a start, breathing heavy. I lifted my head from Jane's bed and again stretched in the chair. The clock read 5:30 am. I stood and gave Jane a quick peck on the cheek. I needed to get out of this room, perhaps go to the cafeteria and get some coffee. I grabbed my backpack and stopped by the nurse station to let Jane's nurse know where I was headed. She nodded and told me where the cafeteria was.
I headed back up to Jane's room an hour later, feeling revived after drinking a cafe mocha. I walked in to the room to find Trent asleep in the chair I was in earlier. I decided to let Trent have some time with Jane alone. I left a note letting Trent know that I went to the apartment to shower and check my e-mail.
I walked outside and bundled my jacket up closer. It had got colder since yesterday, and there was more snow on the ground than I remembered. The walk to the hospital wasn't far, only a couple of blocks. I neared the apartment in the same pre-dawn light that Jane and I basked in our first night together. I sighed. I was about a block away from the apartment when something in my peripheral vision caught my attention. Something shiny. I shrugged, figuring it was a broken beer bottle from a frat party. Suddenly, I heard feet shuffle behind me and I was knocked to the ground. I gasped in shock and pain as something sharp entered my back, twice. My attacker ran away in front of my visual field, but it was too dark and I was in too much shock to make out any details before I passed out.
|...2 Days later...|
I slowly opened my eyes and looked around. I was in the hospital, I knew that for sure. I had no idea what had happened, but my back hurt. I wasn't on a respirator, but an oxygen mask had snuggly been placed over my nose and mouth. All this activity seemed to not agree with the machines I was hooked up to, because they started beeping and making all kinds of noises. Not more than a minute later, a nurse came barreling in.
"Oh honey, you're awake!" The nurse said, silencing all the noisy machines. "How are you feeling?" I was very groggy and my throat hurt, but I managed to talk.
"My back is killing me. What happened?" I asked, in a rather rough sounding voice. The nurse frowned in concern, like I was supposed to not be talking like that.
"Well, you were attacked," She explained. "Stabbed 2 times in the back. Once in the left kidney and once in the right shoulder blade. Tell me, do you know your name?"
"Daria Marie Morgendorffer," I answered, trying to keep the sarcasm out of my voice. "Why's my throat so sore? And what about Jane?" The nurse picked up my chart and browsed through something.
"Well, Ms. Morgendorffer, we had to remove your left kidney, and to do so, we had to intubate you temporarily for the surgery. That's why your throat's sore," She said, matter-of-factly. "As for this 'Jane', I'm not sure what you mean."
"Jane Anne Lane, she's the patient in room 751," I said, hoping that she would know whom I was talking about. "She's, um, my girlfriend." The nurse stared at me for a moment before shaking her head.
"I'm sorry, but I'd have to call up to the 7th floor nursing station to find out," She said, writing something down in my chart. I sighed and closed my eyes. "Oh, your family was here earlier. They'll be back soon to see you." And with that, she departed. I managed to sink further down into the bed. Great.
|...3 hours later...|
My parents had come to visit me, as the nurse promised, sans Quinn. I didn't really expect anything else. Dad had brought me a stuffed rabbit. It was a little childish, but cute and I appreciated the gesture. Mom, of course, was babbling on her cell phone, which she was asked to turn off many times by the hospital staff. I'm surprised she didn't get kicked out of the hospital.
"So, kiddo. How are you feeling?" Dad asked, his usual oblivious self. How did he expect me to feel?
"My back hurts, but my throat stopped hurting, finally. Other than that, I'm just peachy," I said, yawning. "Say, would you guys mind doing me a favor?" Mom immediately came to my side.
"What can we do, Daria?" She asked, taking my left hand into her own. Dad stood next to her, looking obedient, as usual.
"Can you guys check on Jane for me and let me know how she is?" I asked.
"Oh, yes Daria. Of course," Mom said.
"Anything, kiddo!" Dad chorused. Well, at least I would find out how Jane was.
They came back 30 minutes later to report that Jane was still on the respirator and still hadn't woken up yet.